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The 2006 remake of the classic 1973 cult film The Wicker Man is a piece of shit from start to finish. Basically, they took the "B picture" aspects and discarded most of the rest. It's as if LaBute and co. were aware that it had a cult following, but had no idea why.
The folk tunes, which were such an important part of the original, are the most obvious loss. They were woven into that movie's sense of living tradition (albeit one invented by Summerisle's grandfather), along with the dances and references to mythology. Instead, for the remake, we get a rather uninteresting score by Angelo Badalamenti. But they ruined the narrative, too...
Summerisle, Scotland is a place I could live. The people there are good-humoured and human (at least until the end, anyway). More seductively, we see them as holding on to an earthy joyous paganism long lost elsewhere. They tease, manipulate, and finally murder Sgt. Howie, of course, but they respect him for what he stands for. When Summerisle at last says "the game is over", there's a sense of relief. One doesn't object so much to the destruction of Sgt. Howie partly because he's following out his destiny as a martyr within his own Christianity, and partly because his death resonates with us as a purging of the authoritarian, censorious part of ourselves.
There's none of that in the remake. The islanders of Summersisle, WA are rather dour matriarchal cultists, and ultimately just plain evil in a rather boring and improbably inhuman way. Their cult draws on very little of any pagan interest. They don't have the same respect for Patrolman Malus or "honour" him the way the original islanders do Howie "as a fool and a king". But equally, I couldn't identify much with Malus either, he doesn't have Howie's sense of religious purpose in life, and no wit or cunning to make up for the loss. Cage's acting is almost amateur in places. And we don't even get much beekeeping realism.
There are lots of inconsistencies in the remake. Why didn't the California cop involve local law enforcement? Perhaps because to Californian movie producers, the entire Pacific Northwest is the scary pagan "other". How could the islanders have spent years setting this up if it's in response to the previous year's honey "crop failure"? Why don't they pick one of their own men, who really would have a "blood connection" to them?
I suppose the locations (BC being the cinematic WA) and cinematography were OK. Oh, and some of the costumes are quite pretty. Don't bother seeing this one unless you have to see for yourself how bad it is.
