we don't want nobody nobody sent

sometimes i see an opinion i disagree with, and from a combination of wanting to keep up appearances, avoid flak, and cut to the heart of the issue, i draft a series of increasingly abstract responses, eventually culminating in typing out "falsehoods aren't true", which, in a perfect act of autofellatio, deletes itself

i dont care that primetime comes out next month they need to let me watch it right now

Yellow-tailed Black Cockatoo displaying a rare genetic mutation called leucism which creates a stunning blend of yellow, white, and black feathers.

let’s all crash our cars into walls

see it’s literally fine if we just do it safely

todays enemy is someone named Dori in cincinnati who is trying to sell her camaro and has been giving people MY number instead of hers and people are on my ass like crazy trying to get this fucking car

We’re over the need of ice breakers in meetings. We’re certainly over the need to go through ice breakers for a meeting of 20 or more strangers. Keep the ice. Just convey the information.

Item: apparatus allowing a horse to fire a gun

that post where someone says lesbians are over represented in media and all the examples were kids cartoons. lol

I mean, cartoons are the only media that ever mattered to me… so yeah?

this is a really embarrassing addition to be making at 40 years old unfortunately

ok there's nothing wrong with cartoons honestly i dont watch them or any tv in general but what, you think adults should only want to see real humans doing bad acting/simulating of emotions in a non plausible way instead of animation which can be a lot more visually interesting and not just people being bad at acting .. idg what the point being made here even is. haha you're 40 and watch cartoons. okay and you apparently like watching real humans being filmed performing emotions unconvincingly. now what 😐

you’re the second person to witness this interaction and sincerely believe the embarrassment comes from “you watch cartoons” and not “um, well I only watch cartoons so yeah [lesbophobic made up shit] is true actually” which should also be really embarrassing for you

there was a lesbian in glee.

and? 😭

my get rich quick scheme is to run a writing workshop where people pay $1000 a day for me to tell them that writing is good because all art is valuable and it’s just important to make things

you ask me how you could make your writing better and I just smile and pat your head and tell you just to write from the heart