relationhelp, posts by tag: support - LiveJournal

The Executive Producers of the A&E program, "Intervention" are looking for individuals who are living a double life.


My name is Lindsey and I am a Casting Assistant for GRB Entertainment, the Executive Producers of "Intervention". We are looking for people to participate in our new documentary series about individuals who are leading a double life.


As an avid livejournal user myself, I am aware that the online community and livejournal in specific, offer the comfort of anonymity. Being able to divulge secrets and seek advice in an online forum may be enough for some people but others may be looking for more. It is my hope that we can use forums such as this to reach out to those in need-those who are ready to seek help and relieve their burdens.


First of all, let me be super clear in that we are in no way out to exploit people for their stories. This is not a reality show meant to merely entertain. We are here to help.


We are searching for people who are tired of keeping their secret (whatever it may be) from their family, friends, and loved ones. We are only looking for people who are genuinely interested in finding healing in their lives.


The goal of this transformational series is to help people rebuild and heal fractured lives. We treat all our participants with the utmost respect and extreme sensitivity. Participants will be offered the choice to consult with a therapist during production.


If this is something you or someone you know may be interested in, please contact us via email: doublelife@grbtv.com, by phone at 818.461.1635 (ext 1115) or by a PM.


Thank you so much.

So I've been in a relationship for six months now, and we've been having sex from the start of it (we were having sex before we were officially dating). Recently, my boyfriend said to me that he would like to stop having sex, because he is afraid our relationship is becoming all about sex. I agreed, because, well, there's not really much else I can do (can't exactly force him to have sex 8D and I would never do that anyway). Inside though, I can't help feeling sort of .... disappointed? He's the only person I've had sex with, and in a way, I guess I feel it isn't fair? Because he's been sexually active since he was 13, and I've only been active for six months. I feel like I'm at a stage in my life where I want to explore my sexuality (especially now that I'm no longer a virgin), but I obviously can't do that if my boyfriend doesn't want to have sex. I have low confidence when it comes to my ability to be sexy or anything of that sort, but I can't practice or gain confidence if I don't have a willing partner to do this with.

There are some other factors that I feel are contributing to his lack of desire for sexual activity. We're both extremely stressed out (his parents are getting a divorce, I'm recently unemployed), I suspect he has some depression (because of the weather, because of his family drama, and just perhaps some latent depressive tendencies), and because, as he's told me, he doesn't feel any encouragement from me. He asked me recently if anyone's ever "sweet-talked" me (such as calling me "Sweetheart" or "Baby" or anything like), and I told him no, not really, and that I'm not really comfortable with myself saying things like that, because it doesn't come naturally to me. He told me he needs that sort of thing to feel encouraged. I understand it, I can appreciate it, but I don't know what to do with that information. I'm afraid we're stuck in a negative feedback loop. He's backing off because he doesn't feel encouragement from me, and I'm not initiating things or being as forward as he would like because of a lack of confidence, and when he pulls away, it just makes me feel less confident. I told him that I want the first two months of our relationship back. I said I felt we had fun and things were easy then, but that now, everyday was sort of ... a lot of effort?

I mean, is this normal for a relationship? Is my feeling disappointed about the decrease in sex suggestive that maybe our relationship was/is based on sex, at least on my part? Or is it just incompatibility? He sometimes says that he thinks I don't care, based on my actions, but I feel like my actions show that I care, so maybe we're just not communicating? I really don't know what to think or feel anymore. I go back and forth with myself a lot: sometimes I think it's too hard, it's too much effort, and yeah, relationships take work, but is it supposed to be this much work? and then sometimes I feel like things are okay, and I feel good being with him, and being close to him, and the way he talks to me sometimes is just what I need to hear.

I know it's bad to do it, but I compare how I perceive our relationship to be with how I see other people's relationships. When I see theirs, they alway seem so happy, and laughing, and flirtatious with each other, and me and my boyfriend just aren't like that anymore. I mean, is it likely that both of us just need to put more work towards things? We've talked about this a lot (I feel like it's all we ever talk about anymore), and I just don't know that anything's getting resolved. So, what are your suggestions?

Hello everyone, my name is Andrea, and I just joined this community today (someone linked it in a comment to a question asked in another community I'm a member of). I thought, "wow, what a godsend, I needed unbiased opinions about my situation! :O" I keep asking my friends and family, but they're all biased towards me, and I feel like they're all too close to the situation to give me any good advice.

So, hopefully you all will be able to give me some clarity. With that said, on to some background.

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So a friend's friend is having a bit of a situation with his girlfriend. He wants to break up with her, and she is threatening to kill herself if he does. Apparently she has attempted to harm herself, so she sounds like she's pretty serious about it (not that anyone should ever be cavalier about someone threatening suicide).

I don't want anyone to hurt themselves, of course, but I wouldn't want anyone to stay in a relationship only because they're being guilted into it.

So I'm asking you guys what is the best thing to do? I suggested to my friend that her friend call a suicide help-line, and perhaps contact a friend or her parents to monitor her/be there when he breaks up with her so she is not alone during the most sensitive time of the break up.

What am I overlooking?

I had an ex boyfriend who threatened to kill himself, but was not actually harming himself. I finally said to him (after a year and a half of the threats) "if you kill yourself it's not because of me. You obviously have problems that aren't about our relationship." (Clearly I wasn't the most sensitive 18 year old, but it had gotten old.)

Help?