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@cloudpetals / cloudpetals.tumblr.com

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life is so stinky poop right now. i don’t even know how to wait for things to get better i am just getting up to get ready for work taking my meds showering brushing my teeth on autopilot until i die. for years. how am i about to be 25 and i can’t tell if i have actually friends or not. why can i not make decisions for myself and take risks that might be worth it. why can’t i create. i complain and complain and wallow but sometimes maybe thats all that’s left of me. until i die. for years

#it has to get better at some point right#i will have ppl that want to text me and check in on me right#i will feel loved like genuinely loved because i believe ppl when they tell me they love me right#right…..RIGHT#someone get me to finish making these cover letters#so i can apply at better jobs#i have to do something#owen if u see this#please know for some reason i have been thinking of u#which is weird and random cus i know we don’t talk that much but u have shown me nothing but kindness#and i like to think in another timeline we are good friends irl#u are such a warm person with such a powerful mind. u make the world a better place
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horses touching noses tenderly in the snow these horses love for one another is palpable as they pause side by side in their tracks which are visible in the snow and trail backwards what a beautiful intimate moment of companionship and mutual affection