When the corporate customer service quiz has this as a question:

And you have to decide if you want to pass the course or be true to your heart.

showing this to the customer:

(Blythe Baird)

We are monitoring the situation

you have to get this piercing!

DJ selfcest wants everyone to feel themselves in the club tonight

Ngl this has me kind of mad. Someone made AI slop of my art to advertise some slop app. I’m so mad because I declined hundreds of sponsorship offers for apps that felt exploitative of vulnerable groups and „ADHD-curing“ vitamins, and I’m here feeling bad advertising my book and they just go and do this. One of these vitamin grifters have used my art before without approval.

- I’ve only ever accepted one sponsorship for a drawing tablet

- I don’t use AI

- I don’t partner with vitamins, herbs, coachings, apps, anything that would make use of my target audience and that I don’t strongly believe in myself

So please know that if I do sponsorships I’ll post about it on my own channels to let you know. Please be safe out there, report these ads and never hesitate to ask me if you’re unsure.

And it should go without saying but I would never insult myself as an artist to this degree by using AI to make images for me. I do not use AI and despise having my art fed into it.

Thank you for making me aware of this and being with me for so many years 🫶

Spangled Kookaburra (Dacelo tyro), family Alcedinidae, order Coraciiformes, New Guinea

photograph via:  Ornis Birding Expeditions

I NEED TO WRITE FANFICTION <- guy who is perfectly capable of writing fanfiction <- guy who is not writing fanfiction

always such a struggle when you get to the sex scene part of the fic you're writing and you're not horny at all. i don't know. their things were touching. without ANY underwear. the end.

#I'm a firm believer that there are ideal levels of horniess for each stage of writing erotica #Conceptualization: Mind-Meltingly Horny #Drafting: Pleasant Fizz of Arousal But Not Too Much #Editing: Not Horny At All - this is about sentence flow + word choice + general setting #Right Before Posting: Not Yet Horny But Amenable To It - final check to make sure youre not getting knocked out of the sex by prose oddities (@tinwomanrunaway)

never forget the universal rule of the order of things: People Will Not Read It

signs at stores? émail? menu ?? instruction ? post online ? caption with andswer to question ? group hand outs ??? street sign ??? no. The Written Word Is The Enemy

#The number of compliments i have gotten for reading a thing

The ability to occasionally Read A Thing will make you a hero in your workplace, especially if it is for example an error message that tells you what you need to do differently, or instructions on unjamming a printer.

how dare you say we put jam in the printer

Ok reblogging this again because story time.

I work in tech, and much of what I do is support sales reps within the company by resolving errors with the software they use.

There is one sales rep who, every single time I send her a message or email with extremely specific instructions that will resolve her issue, does something completely different from what I tell her. Every time. Without fail. It is so glaringly obvious that she has never read even a single word that I have written to her.

So one day, she sends me a message that says little more than "(software) is broken, help"

So I do my standard song and dance of asking her what she's trying to accomplish, and what specifically is stopping her from doing that. And eventually, after much unnecessary back and forth, she tells me there's an error message. I ask her to send me a screenshot of the error message. She does.

The error message basically says, "these two required fields are blank. To resolve this, please fill in these two specific fields, and then click save."

So I take a few deep breaths.

Then I lie to her.

I message her back, saying "hey yeah, for some reason it's not loading that screenshot on my end. Could you type out the full text of the error message for me?"

She does.

I ask her if she still needs help.

She does not respond.

I have similar story from tech support.

Client is reporting that Some Thing Program doesn't work. I ask if there's an error message with further information about what's not working. Client says "no". I go over and ask Client to open Some Thing. Client double-clicks on the icon for Some Thing, it starts to boot, an error message dialog flashes up on screen, Client closes error message before I can read it, Thing closes after the error.

"What did that error message say?" I ask.

"What error message?" asks Client.

I tell Client to open the Some Thing again and then not click anything else. Client opens Some Thing, error message appears, Client clicks it away again.

I tell Client to stand up, step away, and give me physical control of the computer. I open Some Thing, start looking at the error message without closing it, and Client says "You should close that." I tell Client that I am reading the error message. Client is apparently accustomed to treating error messages as a kind of spam email that should be deleted as fast as possible, and gets agitated that I'm reading it.

I read the error message. It tells me what the problem is. I fix the problem. Some Thing works now.

---

Later, I start thinking about how such an error message might perhaps be engineered to be more attention-grabbing and close-resistant as a way of making people read it. It's not important for some random program here, but there are more important systems (medical, etc) where it would be reasonable to demand the user's attention because people's lives depend on paying attention to the error message.

But then people with a perverted intellect would still be thinking about ways to avoid reading the message, like dragging it off edge of screen or hiding it behind another window. So maybe the dialog box could have an always-in-front feature to override other windows, and the alert could use the computer's hardware "beep" functionality that can't be switched off by muting the regular sound system, and keep beeping... shit, I realize I'm reinventing pain, and get philosophical about it.

Story from The Past about My Mum:

She was a computer programmer / analyst, a... Long Time Ago. Called in for a system she'd installed before, the office folk said they kept having problems where it Didn't Work Right (no error, a malfunction)

She investigated, and told them that could only happen if they did 3 specific things in a specific order, which they should not ever do.

So, she asked, did they ever do that?

No! Of course not, was the answer.

So she made a couple of small changes, packed up and said that should be fine, but they should call her if there were problems.

The next week

She had a call saying "We're getting a strange error message on the system, can you help?"

She said, of course, can they tell her the error?

And the message was:

"You Said You Didn't Do This"

i think if your kid is precociously good at an adult hobby like cooking or sewing or whatever and you try to monetize it by turning them into a three-year-old influencer you should be locked in a funhouse until you change your mind

I'm against capital punishment even in my tumblr posts #consistency

added to the only a gif but sounds like shit archive

guy on the left just slappin his dick

A comic about something that happened a while ago,, I still feel guilty in a way that I was there that day.

what if they were black AND gay...everyone needs to get woker NOW

Making sticker sheet of my sillies yayassss

idk but when i discover new books and music i’m just excited to be alive again. yes a bit dramatic but that’s how i feel when i discover them