I remember when I tried my first anamorphic lens and couldn’t help myself from beaming lights directly into it for fun flares. It is truly surreal to watch a blockbuster movie that seems to never have outgrown that fascination.

Beyond the messy script and a borderline Neil Breen-esque plot, I’m even more baffled by cinematography that is plagued with unmotivated movement and unmotivated lighting, all packed into a strange edit that makes some line delivery feel awkward and unintentionally funny. …

Penis joke haha butthole lol wolverine claw go in butthole penis lol funny because almost gay joke fuck word penis lol butthole holy shit Chris Evans fire guy fuck word penis joke butthole boner fuck word!

Our standards need to be higher. They need to be. I should not be watching this amongst roaring laughter in a packed theater. I’m aggro and my expectations were on the floor.

I was going to be fair and give it a full star…

Hahahahahaha I get it now!

Not to be dramatic, but watching Paul ride the worm for the first time was a cinematic experience I’m going to remember for maybe the rest of my life. After the first film I never thought this one would pull so many goosebumps out of me. 

This is probably the biggest cinematic glow up of all time! Or maybe I’ll revisit the first after this whiff of spice and come around to it after all.…