One star for Aaliyah, one star for the music. Still a better Lestat than Tom Cruise. And, hey, look, it's Paul McGann!

Proof that something can be irrefutably terrible yet equally fun to watch at the same time.

I used to love this film when I was young, but I'm afraid I find much of it more tedious now. (The show has spoiled me. Also, should Pitt and Cruise have swapped parts?)

This mere two-hour dip into Anne Rice's world may look like the more faithful adaptation from the description, but the television series touches much more on the book series' deeper truths (not to mention the deeper truths of the real world) – and is far more entertaining besides.

As for this film, Kirsten Dunst is still far and away the highlight. And super-fun ending.

Let's do Beetlejuice meets Monsters, Inc. – but make it deeply Taiwanese, and thoroughly 21st century. Make sure there's humor both slapstick and sarcastic – grounded in the story of a young woman literally crushed by the weight of her family's expectations, and a gang of influencers and misfits struggling to understand what it really means to be seen.

I thought this was going to be a movie about learning empathy, which made me inclined to like it — and I suppose it *was* meant to be that, but the messaging is so muddled, and so much of it seems just ugly and cruel. Like, is the man really teaching the kids that revenge is the way?? And why are the kids attacking a pig after the man said one saved his life??? Maybe I'm just too sick to get this right now, but it left me feeling icky and even more despondent about humanity.