A dragon on the wing

Current status: Main set, 65. "Grease the skids (i.e. Greasy)" set, 40, two times a day.

Friday's sets went well, and yesterday was Rest Day (Wednesdays and Saturdays). For some reason, today's main set was ROUGH. Hopefully today's greasy sets will go better, especially since tomorrow those go from 40 to 45 each.

Oh, well. If it was easy, there'd be no pride or sense of accomplishment in reaching the goal.

Oh, my aching arms!

Normally, I do three sets of pushups a day: one major set in the morning, and two smaller sets to "grease the skids" that I jokingly refer to as my "greasy" pushups later in the day (usually one in the afternoon and one in the evening).

I've been pacing the "greasy" ones at about 1 rep / second. Nothing outstanding, but slow enough to let me focus on all the little details of form that I sometimes lose track of on the major set. (Sorry, haven't actually timed the major set yet, but it's faster than 1 rep/sec.)

Today I was "feeling my oats" and decided to slow the first greasy set down a bit, to something along the lines of 2 reps every 3 seconds (50% slower).

At which point I discovered that even though I'm usually pretty good at multi-tasking/task switching, my brain hits a big ole Blue Screen O'Death if I try asking it to focus on technique details and... oh... math.

Instead I ended up doing them at a rate of 2 seconds per rep, which is a MAJOR effing increase in effort! I made it through about 75% of the set, then had no choice but to go to Downward Dog for several seconds before squeezing out a few more reps (no idea what the pace was), more Downward Dog, etc.

I finally managed to accumulate enough reps to finish the set, but O My Stars & Garters, am I ever glad tomorrow is a rest day!

Progress is... well... progressing!

I just finished my first set for the day.

This past week I've been doing one "fast" set of 60 in the mornings, then a much slower set of 30 in the afternoon, and another slow set of 30 in the evenings. I've just started adding the slow sets, using them for what I've heard referred to as "greasing the skids" for the main set.

With the progression schedule I've drawn up, I'll be adding 5 reps to the main set every 4 weeks. That first increase will be one week from today, and will bring me to 100 just in time for Midwinter's. I don't have a progression schedule drawn up for the slower sets, but I'm going to add 5 more to those today and however often I feel like I can. As the reps for the slower sets gets closer to the main set, I'll be slowing down the main set until they're all the same speed.

Somebody remind me why I'm doing this?

Oh, right. Because I'm a stubborn bastard who really dislikes coming up short on goals he's set.

I'm a bit disappointed in how much effort it is still taking to get this month's reps in. 3/4 of the way through the month, and I'm still straining.

This does not fill me with warm and fuzzy feelings.

But don't count me out just yet, dear reader -- because I sure as hell haven't!

Still rolling right along with 70 reps. Two more weeks before I take them up to 75.

I've also started doing "greasing the skids" sets at least once a day, usually twice. These are fewer reps but done more slowly and paying more attention to proper form, etc.

I started out at 30 reps for a "skid-greasing" set, based purely on how the body felt when I got to that number the first time.

It didn't take long to realize that 30 reps, even better reps, wasn't really doing anything to challenge me. So I increased them to 35 -- half of my "main" set. That seemed about right... but something about it WASN'T quite right. So after a week I bumped it up to 40. Okay, that seems to work well.

You know how sometimes you can be working on something repetitive, and you're focusing on a particular aspect of it and lose focus on another part? Yeah, that kinda happened.

I was working on keeping my form and controlling my breathing, and just counting in the back of my head, when suddenly I realized that I had "heard" myself count "40, 41, 42..."

So now my "skid-greasing" sets are 45! LOL

I haven't decided on a schedule for increasing my skid-greasing sets (or my "greasy" sets, as I've nicknamed them). Suggestions are welcome, and I'll let you know how they're working out.

Overall a decent week, but oh my stars and garters, after spending an hour and a half today shoveling snow and ice, I am NOT doing pushups today!

One more week at 65 reps, then next Sunday I bump it up to 70.

It's a new month, so that means more 5 more reps.

65 per session.

I'm straining a bit by the end, but I'm getting them all.

Found this, that I had written 11 years ago: Dec 31, 2014. It stirs a few memories, but more good ones than bad. And a few reminders, such as what scars really mean to me...

=========

2014 is almost gone, and I can't say I'm sorry to see it go. Still, for all of the dark spots of this year, taken as a whole I will call it a good year. I've lost too damned many people this year, and I was almost one of them, but I'm too stubborn to "go gently into that good night."

Two months ago, I had a VERY nasty accident -- one that by most standards I should not have survived. Instead of pushing up daisies, I am less than a month away from being finished with my brace, and only one remaining issue still do deal with.

2014 was the year this world tried to kill me. I have a scar on the side of my head that I'll carry the rest of my days, and I'm strange enough to consider it a good-luck charm. I have come to realize what a scar means: that something did hurt me, but that I was stronger than whatever it was, and the scar is the proof of that.

I hope 2015 brings better things for all of us. And when it hits those dark spots, I hope that you'll do what I've found works well for me, which is to remember and follow the advice given in Stan Rogers' song, "The Mary Ellen Carter:"

And you. to whom Adversity has dealt the final blow,
With smiling bastards lying to you everywhere you go,
Turn to! And put out ALL your strength, of Arm and Heart and Brain,
And like the Mary Ellen Carter...
RISE AGAIN!

Some deep thoughts at this darkest time of the year, as I try to find the path with the greatest amount of Light to deal with a situation, and to do my best to navigate in accordance with two philosophies which both make excellent sense.

A bit long-winded, I'm afraid.

One philosophy says to always remember that the spear which pierces the Other's heart is the spear which also pierces yours, for you are he.

A somewhat martial way of expressing one which charges us to do unto others as we would have done to us, or not to do to another that which we find hateful.

The other points out that there is a point where turning the other cheek becomes indistinguishable from condoning the violence the other is doing to you.

Having boundaries, maintaining and defending them, is a good thing. Those who don't want us to have them are almost always those who have something to gain by violating them, and who intend to do so.
Both of these philosophies are valid.

I think I must fall back on a conversation from many years ago with a man who had lived most of his life as a monk. He had just mentioned a core tenet of the monastery: the importance of respecting all living things.

When asked if that applied even to such creatures as mosquitos, he adopted what I think of as "Teacher Face." (You know the one, and many of you have seen me wearing it.)

Holding his open hand palm down at about chin level, he told this story.

Let's say a mosquito lands here on the back of my hand. I may let him take a little bit, then give him a puff of air hard enough to send him on his way. He's fed, and I am unharmed.

But let's say he comes back. I might let him take a little bit more, then use my other hand to thump him away.

If he comes back a third time? At that point, I might swat him.

Because you see, it is important for the mosquito to respect me, too.

Well, THAT'S a first!

Since January, I've been working out with a local Goju Karate club. They're good folks. There are a couple of places where we disagree, and that's fine.

I made the decision that after December, I would discontinue my training with them. When I paid my monthly dues on Monday, I told the instructor that this would be my last month.

His face shut completely down. "Why?"

I didn't want to cause a problem, so I just said, "Eh. There's just some things that don't fit well, and I feel like it's time to go on."

But that wasn't good enough, and he kept pushing.

I have three rules about questions. The first one is: don't ask a question you don't want the answer to.

So I told him a few of the things that had led me to this point, only one of which was in any way a reflection of him or his teachings.

And we left it at that. Other students arrived, we had class, after which he said he hoped I'd change my mind.

Tonight I texted him that I wouldn't be able to make it, but "have a great class and an even better weekend, and I'll see you guys Monday!"

His response: "I have given this a lot of thought and given your view of me and my teaching, think it's best we just cut ties now. Please come get your money, I don't need it and wish you farewell."

WTF? "You can't quit, you're fired"?

Eh, I'll go by Monday night and collect my refund, and wish them all well and let them know that there's no hard feelings on my part. But this is definitely a new experience for me! LOL

Sometimes you have those moments that remind you that even when you don't necessarily realize it, there are others watching you, listening to you, and taking note of things you do or say.

Several years ago, I was talking with a martial artist friend who was working towards their black belt test. The topic came up about what it means to be a black belt and about some of the lesser-known personal challenges that many people encounter along that road. This person was not a student of mine, just a friend who was also into martial arts.

Today I heard from them, and they told me that our conversation from that day had stuck with them through the years.

Fast-forward to today. It seems that they have a good friend who runs a nearby school where a young student is preparing for their black belt test and is experiencing some of those challenges. My friend, now a black belt themselves, shared with the student what I had said years ago.

For me, this wasn't some Formal Teaching Moment(TM) at a class or seminar, or even a one-on-one session with a student. This was me chatting with a friend. But for them, something I said resonated inside and stuck with them.

I am EXTREMELY pleased that what I said helped my friend, and incredibly proud that it made such an impression on them. But for them to pass it along to help someone else? That's some next-level stuff.

Most of all, it drives home the need to be sure that I always walk my talk. I won't always be right. I won't always have helpful things to say. But I hope I can always come from a place of sincerity and honesty, and I figure I can't go too far wrong like that.

There seems to be a theme cropping up again and again around me lately. In the books I read, the music I listen to, whatever.

"[Humans] need to believe in things that aren't true. How else can they BECOME?" -- Sir Terry Pratchett, "Hogfather"

"From the paintings of a child to the works of God above, every act of creation is an act of love." -- Joe Bethancourt, "Acts of Creation" [Edit: I have since been informed that the original author of the lyrics is Catherine Faber]

We as humans have a greater ability to create a greater range of things than any other creature we've ever observed -- and likewise a greater capacity to destroy, but that's a topic for another day.

Tomorrow is the Winter Solstice -- the shortest day and the darkest night of the year. After tomorrow, they days slowly get longer over the next six months. The amount of physical daylight increases, and I hope for you that other forms of Light will increase as well.

What shall we do with this increase?

You may say that Physics tells us that neither matter nor energy can ever truly be created or destroyed, only converted from one form to another. Fair enough. What, then, shall we convert? And what shall we convert it into?

Put another way... what will you create/convert in the days to come?

Perhaps you are like one or more of my friends:

* Matt, who creates delightful artwork -- and well beyond the "paintings of a child" stage mentioned by Mr. Bethancourt/Ms. Faber, too!

* Sharon, who goes out to aid our four-footed or winged cousins who've become injured.

* Caitlyn, who helps make injured bodies become sound again -- to re-create that physical integrity that has become compromised.

* Dvorah, who helps mend people's psyches, their spirits, to get back to where and who they were before their trauma, to create that space and those conditions where such growth (and re-growth) can occur.

Or perhaps you are like one of my many friends who create stories, both the ones you see on the shelves of libraries and bookstores, and the ones that are just as carefully crafted (sometimes more so) but are only seen in various online communities. Creating entire worlds or even universes, sometimes on their own and sometimes as an outgrowth of already-existing works.

Whatever the form your creative aspect may take, I salute you and hope that you will look at year's end with pleasure and pride on what you have wrought.

In a few days, many of us will set goals, expectations, "resolutions" for the new year. Many of these will involve some form of creative effort -- especially creating an improved version of ourselves.

To me, this is one of the highest aims of creation -- to make ourselves better than we were. Physically, mentally, emotionally, even spiritually.

Above that is to make things better for others of our "tribe," our friends, our family, our neighbors.

And highest of all (to me) would be to make things better for our entire world, our entire race and the others who share this bit of rock and water and air with us.

It's going to be awfully dark and cold tomorrow night. What do you say we all go and create a bit of warmth and Light?

STS-51L, with seven aboard. Eight brave souls who "slipped the surly bonds of Earth to touch the face of God."

( Remembrances, and thoughts on souls )

We are a very powerful nation, in many different ways.

Power is like a hammer: you can use it to smash and destroy, or you can use it to build.

These last few years, we've seen the destructive use of that hammer. Not against the enemies outside our borders, but against our neighbors and against ourselves.

The tone of our new "John Henry" this morning sounds like we can expect to see a different use of that hammer. I truly hope this will be so.

But it's not all about the people on Pennsylvania Avenue, or the people on Park Avenue. It's also about the people on Main Street. It's about you and me, and what we choose to do.

It has always been easier to destroy than to create. Destruction just takes energy. Creation takes controlled and directed energy. It's harder and it's slower, but didn't we used to pride ourselves on our willingness to do the hard things that need to be done, and our determination to stick with them and see them through?

I may not have as much power as anyone with a *TUS label (POTUS, SCOTUS, etc), but that doesn't mean I have none. I get to choose whether I'm going to build or destroy. Whether I'm going to live my days filled with anger, or with optimism.

That's a choice I made a long time ago. If you know me at all, you know what that choice was and is.

What's yours?

Oh, my dear and fluffy lord.

( Disturbing thoughts ahead )

Dad's been gone just over 9 months now, but he still cracks me up sometimes.

Last night, I finished what I understood were the requirements for Stage 3 of the knife-throwing program I'm doing and sent in the video. Sadly, I was told that I had misinterpreted one aspect of the requirements, and would have to re-do it. (Mind you, at least 3 other people made the same "misinterpretation" that I did.
But I digress...)

So today at lunch, I went out and did a few practice throws, then in less than 5 minutes I had my new video with their interpretation of the requirements.

And as that last knife went home, I distinctly heard my father's voice in the back of my head: "Well, I guess you fucking well showed THEM, didn't you, boy?"

Thanks, Dad. :-)

And on that note... onward, to Stage 4!

I was doing okay until I saw the footage of the people outside the Supreme Court singing Amazing Grace.

RBG, thank you for all that you did. Heaven knows, we needed you -- we still do, but it would be unfair and ungracious of us to be anything but grateful that you carried so much load for so long.

Part of me is thinking, "God help us"... but I've always been more inclined to believe that we need to do all within or power before calling on a different Power.

So I guess it's time to figure out how to best bring about what our country needs, what our world needs, and make it happen.

Hey, folks.

Do any of you play a game system called Hero Games?

If you do, do you have (or know anybody who has) the supplement "Star Hero"?

Thanks in advance!

We have an awesome Boxing Day tradition of many years' standing -- one of our dearest friends opens their house to those us and other who've had too much family, or who have no biological family left to them, and we gather and watch old movies and exchange gifts and gorge ourselves on roast leg of lamb.

Even as I write this I am sprawled on the couch, blissfully sliding into a food coma.

This year there is sorrow for me at this season, as well as the many joys. My father is no longer with us.

Tomorrow morning GryphonRhi and I will rise early and drive to my home town for a memorial service for him. I know that many people who've known me my entire life will be there. I wish I thought I would remember more of them than I expect to.

Some of them I will be happy to see after so many years. Some I will even be quite amused if they show (my home town, while small, boasts a few celebrities).

And then there are also a few that I hope are NOT there. Sadly, those people are also my ... let's refer to them as kin, rather than as family.

But those of you who have spent any time at all with me know that I am almost constitutionally incapable of dwelling on negatives for very long. So shall it be with this -- I will look forward to the good things that the day will bring, and while I will accept the less-wanted things, I will not allow them to take precedence.

And I know that is exactly as my father would wish it, too.

I have no idea why this popped into my head today. It just showed up, fully formed, like Athena bursting forth from Zeus' forehead (fortunately without the headache).

Leverage, the series. Season 4, The Last Dam Job.

I'm convinced now that Chaos is playing both sides of the field.

Three on-screen canon points:
1) Hardison, Hacker Extraordinaire, tries to hack into Latimer's mainframe and is immediately caught by someone specifically looking for HIS software, and those defenses took Hardison's software and "spanked it." Chaos is one of the VERY limited pool of people capable of doing that.

2) Chaos was already packed and waiting when Hardison contacted him. I know, Chaos said, "Come on, who else were you going to call?" But how did Chaos know they were going to be calling ANYONE?

3) When Chaos tries to hack the same mainframe, he gets full access immediately, on the first try. It's almost as if he'd already been familiarizing himself with that system, and maybe even had a back door already set up.

My new head-canon? Dubenich knew Chaos hated Hardison and was his equal, so he hired Chaos to set up the mainframe's defenses. After collecting his pay, Chaos then goes to work with the Leverage team, gets to look like an uber-hacker because he gets in so easily (where Hardison has failed again), and Chaos gets paid a second time.

Bastard! LOL

I'm not sure where this came from. I don't write. But one of my role-playing characters (a modern-day wizard, similar to Harry Dresden) started bitching in my head about pentagrams, and this was the result. Warning: has not been beta'd, etc.

( Cut for space )

I haven't been terribly active on this site for a long time. Most of my posts here have been written on DW and cross-posted to here.

The recent changes here are ones that I am not willing to endorse or operate under. As such, I am importing all of my LJ posts over to my DW account and will be deleting all content here ASAP.

Those here who wish to keep in touch, please feel free to contact me as "Draconis" on DW.

For those interested in qigong and are in (or feel like coming to) the Memphis area, I will be holding a 2-day qigong workshop the last weekend in March. Let me know if you're interested and I'll shoot you the details. :-)

In 2017, BE Princess Leia.

Fight on the front lines. Strangle the fascists with the very chains they would have you wear. Be a motherfuckin' General!

Can you imagine a more fitting tribute to Carrie Fisher than if women started living up to that?

Rest in peace, Princess. I'm sure Artoo was waiting to welcome you.