You know what? I'm glad some people haven't lost people they care about, here or elsewhere. I'm glad people are so certain that we will all wind up going home and that going home is the best thing for everyone. I'm glad some people are able to keep some kind of handle on their emotions and remain calm and keep things "in perspective."

But I'm not and I'm not the only one. So stop telling the rest of us not to feel it when people we love and care about disappear. I don't care if anyone thinks it makes us weak and foolish and stupid to form attachments while we're stuck here. I say it's human nature to make the best out of horrific situations, to form relationships and bonds with others. It's how we cope.

And when we lose people we love, we grieve and are angry and sometimes react badly. Yeah, maybe yelling or lashing out is stupid and irrational, and maybe throwing a tantrum is especially dangerous here where people have powers and abilities to be destructive. It's not healthy for them or anyone else, but what gives anyone the right to dictate how people react to pain?

Do not come along and tell people who are hurting that their pain is irrelevant and weak and stupid. Because it's not. For every one person screaming about it, there's probably someone else hiding and hurting and grieving silently and that--emotional repression and shutting people out for fear of losing more people they love--that isn't any healthier than the other extreme.

And you know what? This place might suck and be terrible and we might be stuck here against our wills, but unless you're omniscient, you do not know that returning home is the best thing for everyone here. So don't try to tell me it is. I'm sure there are people here who could argue that.

As for myself, yeah. I know I'm being selfish when I miss my friends. But I'm done apologizing for my emotions. No one should have to.

[Meant to be Private, but she's too upset to remember to bother]

I was actually looking forward to Thanksgiving. Things actually seemed to be turning around for a while.

I'm not feeling all that thankful anymore.

...

Kon... why? It's like--losing him all over again... I didn't get to say goodbye to him, either.

And Robin, too? Both of them? At once? It's just--too much--not fair...

Persephone's going to kill us all or get herself killed. She's snapped. I can't really say I blame her. If Tim--

Oh, God. Tim--

[OOC: And cue the abrupt ending as Cissie worries about how Tim is going to take this news!]

Screened Private: Difficult to Hack

( In which Cissie starts to deal )
[/Private]

I need some fresh air, I think. I haven't practiced, really, since I got here--my coach would have an epileptic fit if she knew. Maybe I'll get a target and go practice. Clear my head. Shooting always helps me think.

...Yeah. I think that's what I'll do.

I'll be in the park.




[OOC: Backdated to before the singing plot]

I'm not in a hurry to repeat that experience.

[Screened to Tim, Lyle, Soma, Robin and Duo]

Thanks for everything, Tim. Really.

Soma and Lyle--thanks for watching out for me. And Robin--thanks for the food and fun. Sorry I was a brat in the park, Duo. I... didn't have great play skills at that age.
[/screened]

[Screened to Tim and Kon: Mostly Unhackable]

Thanks, guys. Really. I'm just--really glad you were both there.

Thank you.
[/screened]

[Screened to Quatre: Mostly Unhackable]

Tim told me that was you. I'm... really sorry. For reacting like that.
[/screened]

Um. We... have a lot of food. A ton of stew and muffins and biscuits and whatever, so--let me know if you want any.

[OOC: Backdated to the night after the transformation plot ended and after this thread.]

Screened to Kon: Difficult to Hack

There is chocolate cake. When you're ready to pull your head out of your ass talking to people again, come on over.

(Tim made me change that to something nicer. Look. This is tough love--get your act together and get over here for some cake before I come looking for you.)

[OOC: Backdated to just after Belldandy's mind-control plot ended.]

So I've been here three weeks now. In three weeks, there have been vampires, annoying tomatoes that bite, strange and horrifying hallucinations and nightmares and then there was the ball the other day. That was a huge success.

And I really *liked* that dress.

Now there are random bombs, windows being broken or smeared with *junk* and mind control? Ugh.

But. At least I have friends here, and I'm making new ones--which, you know, is impressive, considering how long it took my best friends at home to stop thinking I was a bitch. (Granted, with Anita--I *was.* I miss her, but I'm glad she's not here--she'd go crazy worrying about her family.)



However. Certain of those friends needs to stop acting like a spoiled brat and get over his snit fit and accept the fact that people care about him. He can stop being a jerk and pushing us away any time now.

Just because I'm pissed doesn't mean I don't care. Or that I'm going to stop bugging you about it.