I'm new. This community seems pretty righteous. Here is my latest asshole story:
I met this coke-fiend the other day at a friends house. Our town is dry right now, so he was having withdrawl. I told him I had a little bit of coke left and that he could have it. He got really excited. I went to my car, got a can of Coca-Cola, walked back into the house and threw it at his head. He cried a bit, then I snorted a line in front of him that I had in my bag. It was a nice day. And, for some reason, that guy is still nioce to me...
I was walking around downtown with my friends one day. I noticed a bum sitting off to the side of the sidewalk. As I started to pass him, I felt my boot connect with something. It was his change can, he had had it out in front of him. I paused for a second then went back to walking, catching up with my friends who hadn't noticed. I looked back to see the bum scrambling around the crowded sidewalk for his change.
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- Current Music
- Acid Bath - Scream Of The Butterfly
Hello everyone,
I'm new.. *waves*
me: get this
me: i was walking around my hall last night
bry: ha
me: with a sock in my pant
me: s
me: tight pants
bry: omg
bry: omg
bry: ha
me: and my friend was like
me: hey!
me: check out this guy
me: he's HUGE!
me: and i was getting all embarassed sayin
me: that he had been makin fun of me all night
me: because i dont usually wear tight pants
me: and this one girl
me: was ridiculously into it
me: such the size queen
bry: haha
bry: an 30 mins later she swallowed?
me: naw
me: but she was following me around
me: not being able to take her eyes of it
me: it was fucking spectacular
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- Current Music
- major league on VH1(?)
i'm really jealous of my friend and her boyfriend because they always think of the best games. one weekend they found an old coonskin type daniel boone hat thing, so what did they decide to do?
tie a fishing line to it, stretch the line across the street and hide in the bushes, and when a car comes pull the string really fast so the hat shoots across the street and the car thinks it was like a cat or something. one day they're going to get someone killed.
also dragging a big branch in the road and covering it in vaseline is really funny. people get the most hilarious expressions on their faces when they go to drag the branch away.
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- Current Mood
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bitchy
over the summer, this girl who was like...my best friend started going out with my other friend's ex boyfriend. this bothered me quite a bit because fr one, he was an ass, and for two, she was being really public and creepy about it to the point where my friend who USED to date the guy was really bothered. that was so uninportant.
anyway
the point was, my friend decided to CALL ME UP AND TELL ME that after knowing this guy for aproximately 5 entire days, she had unprotected sex with him. she seemed quite proud of herself, but warned me not to tell anyone.
so i went into her journal, hijacked it by changing the email and password, and exposed her sex life on the internet. i think the funniest part was when she caled me and left me voice mail messages crying about my betrayal. hahahaha.
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- Current Music
- liz phair-flower
envious