I noticed recently that I am the type of person who might be against what most of the group of people do. In fact, I don't know if this has something to do with the social trauma I had before or it is just another change in my point of view.
I don't know why dealing with people seem to be very hard on my part. I need to work my butt off on Human Resource Management or better yet have a doctorate degree on that. Lol.
Greetings, you can call me Kaye. I got to know lots of people because of my SS501 and DoubleHJ obsession but I don't have lots of fandom friends that I am close with in real life. There were very few who know me better or actually be friends with me. I can count with my fingers. The others, well they are my friends only when it comes to my fandom but nothing more than that. Lol so much drama but it's actually true.
People only talk to me when they need something from me. People only talk to me when they need DoubleHJ. Lol sometimes, I am quite annoyed by it.
Lol sorry for the fucking drama, I am not trying to be a drama queen or something. Lmao just stating about people.
Lol I am so fucking obsessed with gay stuffs. Everything gay makes me happy lol.
I also find myself not interested with anything heterosexual anymore. Lol. Seriously. That's one of the reasons I find dramas hell boring. I don't watch dramas anymore well except for gay ones. Nor series except for gay ones. XD
I would be undergoing a 300-hour internship in an Insurance company this summer and it will last until end of May, I guess. Our school obliged us to have some sort of a journal to express our daily realizations and I am planning to use LJ because I know I would be able to keep some good and memorable stuffs here. I won't make it viewable to anyone though because I don't want to hurt your eyes XD
Well, to be honest I am kind of having mixed feelings about it. I find it stressing but exciting as well. I hope I can be lucky on my 1st day :3
These kind of people makes it a burden for me to even try reading updates from various social networks I used to love taking a visit. I really wonder if they even realize that they are barking too much that it causes other people to feel the same way I am actually feeling right now. I think it is good to express your thoughts openly but not to the extent that it will make you sound stupid and so damn irritating.
You could have felt this, any ordinary person might feel this especially when the time was so fucking and perfectly right for you to feel it. I guess everything clearly falls with a cycle and the earth and everything that encompasses it has a constant change.
There are lots of stuffs happening lately. It feels crappy and creepy as well. I don't have any idea what will be the next move to make. Ever getting the feeling of being stuck? Feels like that right now and it seriously is not good.
One more thing to blabber about is, I feel like being tested with lots of thoughts again. I am starting to feel paranoid and I don't even know what to do. Hating this feeling, really.
Wishing something or better yet someone would get me out of this paranoia.
I don't get why people have to joke on any matter that is not funny at all in the first place. I seriously think that these people don't have any lives or souls for that matter.
Let me tell you, I am deadly biased over Hyung Jun maybe because I treat him differently, I can't explain it's something more. One thing I don't like about people is that THEY BASH HIM RIGHT THEN without even knowing about the boy.
It's true, I really hated how SS501 got solo activities separately. I really hated solos but since it's REALITY, I can't do anything but just support them from any activity they are into and now that it's Hyung Jun's turn, why don't people support him. Isn't he also a member of SS501?
and this thing even his OWN NAME is attached to somebody else's... I CANNOT TAKE IT. Not even the name of KIM HYUN JOONG! Because they are exactly two different people.
Has anybody ever realized of how that poor boy's working? Has anybody realized that he was the only one trying to speak of SS501 most of the time?
Let me tell you, Hyung Joon DOESN'T EVEN GET A GOOD SLEEP FOR HIS HEALTH! Have you seen his eyebags? Have you seen how hard he worked for Music High then back to his fanmeeting and back to his solo activities! That boy is doing everything. He is so determined. I don't get why people would say bad things to him.
I'm really really depressed now. I can't take this shit. AT ALL.
Let me tell you, Hyung Joon might not be the best out there but at least the boy's striving hard. He will be forever SS501's Maknae in my heart.
My mind suddenly wanted to write a journal entry and I don't even know why. Maybe because it is too bombarded with terms, formulae and extensive readings. I am currently reviewing for my preliminary exams and I can't even concentrate. This kind of thing is probably the toughest ever. I wish it's already Thursday night so I would have to deal in battling monsters in GENSOU SUIKODEN II than battling with these readings.
anxious
annoyed
pensive
bored
angry