there is this really specific thing that very Online women of a certain age (mostly older millennials and younger gen x in my experience) who are married to a man will do where they will refer to their husbands as "Mr. (Part of My Username)"
so like if the username is something like "dancingwithbears" they'll refer to their husband as "Mr. Bears"
i think it is extremely charming
I’m soooooo embarrassed. My lord told me “good night,” but I thought he was calling me a good knight, and, well, you could hear it clink against my codpiece.
must feel good as fuck to curse a prince for being rude to you while you were larping as an old woman for no reason
... you know. If I could transform into someone a CEO is ethically obligated to help and then punish them for failing to do so, in such a way that they can only be accepted into society again if they learn basic moral lessons about decency, I don't think I would do anything else ever again.
amen
Someone should make a scum villain iceberg but the only thing at the very bottom tier is "airplane bro's foot fetish"
cumplane is a perfect ship name methinks. ticks all the boxes:
genuinely combines elements of two character's names
it's their online usernames which are in fact the only names they 100% for sure know belong only to each other (at first)
they're also the only people in their world who know what those names mean and why they have them
play on 'complain' which they do at each other & together all the time
dirty joke
dirty joke x2 actually because the usernames it's based off of are both also dirty jokes
this is gospel to me
every now and then I think about cumplane again and just. wow. their level of soulmates (derogatory) is insane. guys who killed each other before they even met. then when they met each other for real, first order of business was helping each other fake their deaths by killing themselves for real. who's doing it like them.
as a trans man, so many of the things cis men consider to be “emasculating” are so fucking funny. you are our gender’s weakest soldier. you would kill yourself if you were a trans man for a day. how are you going to tell me I’m ‘not a real man’ and then start cheating on your wife because she makes more money than you and it makes you feel ‘emasculated’? your masculinity is as fragile as a champagne glass and you’re throwing stones? lmfaoooo
God made me trans because he knew you couldn’t handle it
Because I saw this mentioned in the comments, I think what cis men describe when they speak about feeling ‘emasculated’ is very different than the feeling of gender dysphoria. It is an ego bruise. A dent. Anything that makes them feel like they are not an upstanding, radioactively, toxically masculine member of dominant gender. “I won’t eat any vaguely phallic fruit because it might look kind of gay and being gay makes you less of a man.” is very different than “My body, the way that I am forced to present myself and the way others perceive me is at odds with my inner self and the core of my identity as a human being and it hurts.”
Once again, God or fate made me trans because the guys who think eating a banana is gay and gay is bad would not have survived. A lot of gender is a performance, they’re rigidly reading from a script and yelling at someone in misplaced rage every time they feel like they got a line wrong, I’m doing improv comedy from the heart with a few fun quotes from the classics that I enjoy.
I was born with the dragon soul. you will not put me on hold
No sorry boss, I didn't get a call back number. She just said something about a dragon soul and hung up
Shen Jiu: I don't need therapy
Mu Qingfang: Just give it a shot. We can start with something easy. How do you start your day?
Shen Jiu: As everyone does, I get out of bed and clean up myself
Mu Qingfang: That's good...
Shen Jiu: Then after I'm washed and dressed, I stand in front of a mirror and remind myself that all men are monsters including myself and everyone will leave me eventually
Mu Qingfang: ...
Mu Qingfang: Ok, so, there's a few things to unpack there...
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