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The "Gandalf is old as balls" meme is textually inaccurate. As one of the Maiar, the fullness of Gandalf's existence pre-dates the invention of sexual reproduction, so strictly speaking he's older than balls.

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One completely unique kind of the fandom torment is when you enjoy a villainous character, but everyone in the fandom just gets their villainy wrong.

Like, yes, this guy is awful, no argues here, but he is not specifically this sort of awful. He isn't a corrupt narcissist hedonistic politician, he's a puritan religious zealot who genuinely thinks that handholding is a sin. This is an entirely different kind of a terrible person, thank you very much.