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JumpyWhumpy

@jumpywhumpywriter

Asks are open! You can ask me anything or request continuations of my stories. I'm an avid book writer who likes to write tension-filled Whump, Vampire Whump, and Hero X Villain short novels as one of my many hobbies! I'm not a minor, but not ancient either :D

MASTERLIST

An updated list of every story I've posted here so far to make them easier to find and read :) Follow me for more awesome writing!

❤️***Patreon Tip Jar 👈 - if you like my stories, maybe help support my goal of becoming a published author?***❤️

I'm a BIGTIME Whump and Hero x Villain writer, always loved the genre, and I've written dozens of snippets and novel-length stories. 😁

NOTE: I DON'T reblog anyone's else's work, EXCEPT posts that relate to me directly, like fanart & fanfics that were created for me. But everything else you see posted on my profile is my original work. Please ask before using any of my ideas.

I LOVE getting fanart, and am always open to crossover stories if anyone wants to use my characters (please tag me in the finished story)

Longer Stories👇 (Shorter ones are near the bottom of Masterlist)

  • ☕️ Villain's Coffee Shop (48 parts) - Villain is left badly wounded after a fight with Superhero and is staggering his way home after escaping Superhero, quickly bleeding out -- when an unlikely rescuer appears. (This story has an animal sidekick)
  • ⚠️ Badly Injured Hero Sidekick Shows up at Villain's Base to Beg for Help (81 parts) - One day Villain finds Hero's precious Sidekick shivering and badly injured on his doorstep. And Sidekick's been blinded by an acid attack as punishment for failing Hero. Villain decides to help Sidekick recover and keep him away from his abusive mentor, but over time he begins to realize that the mental wounds and trauma... goes far deeper than the physical ones.
  • ⚖️ Villain Carewhumper x Stubborn Hero Whumpee (20 parts) - Hero is bedridden, horribly ill with infection and on the brink of death in her own home with no form of help coming... until a dangerous villain breaks into her house and finds her weak and vulnerable. Will he kill her? Or help her heal? And when a living weapon is involved... things get complicated fast.
  • 🎭 Broken Hero vs Mind-reading Villain (22 parts) - Hero goes on a mission with her team to catch Villain, but things go horribly wrong, and she ends up trapped under rubble. Her teammate came to her aid, but when the enemy appeared again, the teammate abandoned Hero to save themself -- leaving her entirely at Villain's mercy. But what will Villain do to her, now that she's in his possession...?
  • 💢 Vampire Captures Vampire Hunter to Use as Bloodbag (82 parts) - Mallory, a vampire hunter, finds himself in deep trouble during a hunting mission gone wrong. Especially when Alex -- a vampire who knows virtually nothing about humans and how to care for them -- decides to claim him as his own pet. Now, Mallory must learn how to survive in a new world as a vampire's bloodbag... and Alex must learn how to properly care for his human to keep him from dying.
  • Villains & Vampires crossover novel (50 parts) - a crossover between Vampire Captures Vampire Hunter and Villain's Coffee Shop. When Villain and Hero's world gets turned upside-down as an old threat arises, they create an unexpected alliance -- with a vampire named Anisa, and Villain's massive panther sidekick.
  • Traitors & Lovers (Hero & Villain) (40 parts) - Villain and Hero were dating, until Villain found out her lover was using their relationship to get information for Agency and take down her criminal allies. Villain disappeared and left him behind, hurt and betrayed and broken-hearted. She survived for three years on her own... before a former ally named Supervillain captured her, pissed that Villain told Hero how to find him when they were still dating, and he decides to leave her broken, mangled body for Hero to find to send a clear message: that he was going to kill Hero next.
  • 🐚 The Siren and the Little Girl (5 parts) - a little human girl was on a boat that sank, leaving her floating lost in the middle of the ocean... where a Siren found her. The most dangerous aquatic predator in the sea. But the Siren didn't kill the girl... why?
  • 🩸Beautiful Blood -- Sadistic Vampire Whumper Keeping Human Pets (24 parts) - a young boy named Asher has a very unique gift: regenerative blood that gives him rapid self-healing properties. But that gift can easily become a curse when a certain Vampire finds this ability absolutely fascinating. Does his blood taste different from other humans...?
  • 🕊Captured -- Wild Humans Hunted and Captured to be Used as Servants (25 parts) - in a world where human pets are considered a convenience and a luxury to own, how will a young boy who was hunted and captured from his home town in the wild and enslaved to bird-people survive in this new environment as a servant? What lengths will he go to to make it out alive?
  • 💀 A Life in the Hands of the Enemy -- Villain reluctantly saves Hero's Life (38 parts) - it must be Villain's lucky day when he accidently stumbles upon Hero in a dark alley, and gets the rare chance to ambush her. He can finally put an end to his greatest enemy.... but he finds out that Hero is already gravely wounded, from injuries Villain didn't cause. Is there a bigger threat Villain needs to worry about...?
  • 💉 Drugged Hero Whumpee used as Party Favor at Villain's Party (19 parts) - Shadow is the city's Hero... or at least, she was, before Villain captured her and decided to use her as entertainment for one of his Villain parties to celebrate her defeat. Villains from all around town have gathered in one place for this event... and Shadow is the center of attention with her rapid self-healing powers. Archenemy is one of the party guests, and when he sees who the 'entertainment' is, he pounces on the opportunity to get Shadow to spill a secret she's never let slip to him... one with the potential to destroy the very city she gave so much to protect.
  • 🎉 Emaciated Villain Used as Entertainment at a Hero's Party (11 parts) - This is basically the twin opposite version of "Drugged Hero Used as Party Favor at Villain's Party" that someone requested, exploring what would happen if the roles were reversed and the villain was the one being hurt at a hero's party.
  • 🛡 Living Weapon Whumpee (66 parts) - Whumpee has been tortured and trained to be a perfect living weapon for war... a lethal killing machine. He is used to mindlessly following orders and carrying out missions. But this time... he's sent to kill a town full of innocents, and things change fast. He still kills them all, of course... but he missed one, and soon after the enemy captures him alive. What will the enemy choose to do with Weapon?
  • 💥 "The Lost Hero" - Crippled Hero Presumed Dead (20 parts) - Hero has been dead for five long years, killed in a vicious battle with Old Supervillain as she bravely defended the city... or so everyone thought. But one day, a boy named Logan is saved from death by a mysterious woman with a strange limp. And he soon discovers the truth.
  • 🦇 Run, Human, RUN (14 parts) - A human named Alexa lives with a group of survivors who have survived a deadly disease that has wiped out practically the entire human race. She struggles to survive with her group in the dangerous world outside the safety of their hideout, but when food finally runs out and they have to venture into the forest just to avoid starvation... Alexa learns that they are not the only ones hunting out here. The group of humans was being hunted too. And the winged natives were not happy to find trespassers in their forest. Can Alexa survive the attack and survive alone in the wilderness for a few days...?
  • 👿 The Monster in the Black Room (40 parts) - Supervillain had a dark secret... and his son Villain is determined to discover it. He is never allowed in 'the Black Room', a place that seems to terrify all of Supervillain's henchmen whenever it is brought up in conversation. And Villain is determined to figure out why.
  • 🔪 Beauty and The Freak (26 parts) - A young trillionaire girl's parents promise to let her buy one thing for her 12th birthday no matter the cost as they attend a high-end party full of expensive jewelry and potential gifts. But the girl is more interested in the 'entertainment', which turns out to be a small collection of monsters and mutated freaks. But one in particular catches her eye. Will she buy it as her gift to herself?
  • ⛓️ Hero Kidnaps Villain (21 parts) - Hero discovers the hero agency is hiding what they do to the villains she captures and brings in -- who all have a mysterious habit of vanishing into thin air. And no one will tell Hero why when she asks. So this time when Hero catches a criminal... she decides to figure out the truth, by letting the hero agency check him in like usual-- before breaking in and kidnapping him to interrogate him about what he experienced in his short time at Agency before he had the chance to disappear like the others.
  • 💊 Whumpee (Nico) Drugged for His Own Good (29 parts) - Prompt I wrote this story after: a whumpee being drugged for their own good, looking up at their friends with fear/anger/betrayal in their eyes.
  • 🪢 Immortal Deity Fights Mortal Human (requested by anon) (5 parts) - Can u write something Abt an immortal challenging a mortal, but ends up being defeated and voluntarily scarred (like on the face, if u want u can even dig out the eye) by the mortal, as a sign of their defeat?? The trope 'immortal being defeated by a mortal' is literally my drvg
  • 💦 Experienced Hero vs Inexperienced Villain (6 parts) - Exactly as it sounds. A cocky, bold, over-confidence Villain meets a skilled, experienced Hero -- who puts Villain's ego back in its rightful place.
  • 🐺 Vampire vs Werewolf Forced Fight for Human Entertainment Masterlist (4 parts) - Summary: Poor Felix, an innocent young vampire gets caught by some nasty humans who needed a new monster for their blood sports, dragging him into a world of cage fighting and violence... Whatever will happen to him? 👉👈
  • ⚔️ Assassin Rescues Prisoner from Target's House (6 parts) - An assassin breaks into his target's house and kills them, easy enough, a job he's done a dozen times before. But as he's leaving, he hears... crying? He follows the sound, and soon realizes that the target wasn't alone in the house -- a young prisoner has been kept there in captivity, brutally tortured and starved, and is in bad state. Maybe he should just put the poor mangled boy out of his misery... but will he?
  • The Wolfen Shapeshifter - Whumper's Collection of Supernatural Beasts - Whumper collects dangerous, unique beasts from all around the world for his living collection. But one day, a new arrival comes -- a badly injured one, and Caretaker is tasked with keeping it alive for Whumper, while also trying not to be killed by it.

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Shorter Stories👇

MASTERLIST #2 (all stories specifically related to my WIP fantasy trilogy involving Shadow & Thomas)

tw. csa. si. ptsd. self-victimization.

it took me awhile to realize why i love part 41 of injured sidekick series. i think i have the words for it now.

Sidekick makes unwanted advances on villain.

i like to deconstruct the psychology of your characters. bear with me here.

OK SO Sidekick -- barely even a teenager -- sidekick is put through horrible amounts of childhood trauma in the hands of hero. mixed with hero's sentiments of "this sexual abuse is for your own pleasure" and also, "this is for my pleasure," sidekick partially absorbs the indoctrination

after all, he has no choice. many csa victims, including people i know, will convince themselves of this same alibi, whether or not the words are being directly fed to them by their abuser.

why?

because if sidekick was forced to actually reconcile himself with the grave actuality and depth to the abuse he was accustomed to, the grief would shatter him. grief over the amount of himself he's lost to his abuser.

is this why villain builds up sidekick's self esteem before sidekick is able to confront hero?

either way, the guilt that his adopted mindset gives him when he makes HIM the abuser of himself (telling himself that it's his fault for getting abused/ putting himself in abusive situations without prompting like in part 41) -- that guilt is far easier to live with than the grief is.

because for many csa survivors, looking at their grief when they are still in the midst of their abuse and abuser is enough to push them to suicide. in this instance, the loss of their own selves gives them enough of a reason to throw the rest of themselves away.

in fact, this is why i'm surprised that sidekick isn't as suicidal after medic forces him to realize the gravity of his trauma; his abuse. but sidekick isnt me, is he? haha, he's always been far more optimistic.

i guess that's what makes him such a good main character, yeah?

anyways. im here to say that part 41 made me realize how much i love the trope of self victimization in whump. sidekick putting himself on a silver platter for villain as if to prove to himself that if villain were to indulge in abusing him, the pain he suffered was completely normal -- that there was nothing wrong with him -- that hero didn't break him.

in a way, running towards abuse from villain was a way of running from the abuse from hero.

ironic, huh?

Avatar

I hadn't thought of it this specific way before, but this is the end vibe I was going for when writing that scene. Sidekick feels like his only worth and value is in serving others at his own expense. His value is solely determined by how helpful he can be.

It feels validating to him to continuing being abused. Makes his trauma more "normal". He won't have to acknowledge it as thoroughly.

In other words, continuing with the self-abuse feels better than guilt. Than grief. Than pain.

Sidekick doesn't WANT to feel broken, so he'd willingly throw himself back into abuse just to avoid experiencing that feeling.

It is ironic that running toward more abuse is a way of running FROM abuse for Sidekick, but that's just how it works for many csa survivors, sadly.

Villain Carewhumper x Stubborn Hero Whumpee part 21

Warnings: LIVING WEAPON VILLAIN, panic attack, aftermath of using weapon training gone horribly wrong, living weapon essentially "glitching"

While his physical body had slowed its hysteria, his gaze held a wild, terrified quality that mirrored that of a cornered animal.

Conflicted. Ready to bite. Unpredictable.

There was no recognition when he looked at her. His eyes were empty pools of darkness that knew no bounds, and yet they held so much emotion that Hero drowned in it. But the one that caught her off guard was seeing fear. She had never encountered someone who looked at her with such profound fear before, let alone Villain of all people. It was unsettling to see him so… shaken.

He was very, very afraid. He was vibrating with it; Hero could see the way his whole body trembled with every breath, hands shaking violently. He was staring at her with a quiet intensity that set her hair on end, an eerie stillness in his expression. Waiting, watching.

"It's me, Hero," she spoke quietly, keeping her voice calm and level. "I have some supplies here to help you if you're hurt. May I?"

Her eyes scanned over him, finally noticing the injuries Other Hero had mentioned. He honestly looked like he'd been hit by a train or something. A big piece of metal was embedded deep in his thigh, the jagged tip protruding grossly from his flesh, and his leather battle suit was shredded on his whole left side, exposing deep bruises clearly made by a seriously hefty blunt force impact. Many long gashes and smaller scrapes littered that whole side of his body as well, while the other half of him looked mostly untouched.

Blood slid down his skin in scarlet rivulets, dripping steadily to the floor and forming a growing puddle under him. Most alarming was the trickle of red coming his head and the corners of his mouth.

What the hell happened?

Anonymous asked:

are you sure this series was named correctly im beginning to suspect you meant to call it "carewhumper hero and stubborn villain whumpee"

You have a very, VERY good point there 😅

I never thought this story would take the turn it did when I originally gave it that title. I've actually been genuinely considering changing it to something more fitting because I generally like to have my story titles hint at what the story itself is about, and as of now the whole rest of this one that I've got planned is essentially the opposite of what the title is Lol. But I can't decide if I want to do that versus leave it as it is XD

Okay people, take a vote. For this series linked here, should I change the title or keep it the same?

Alternative titles could be things like "Living Weapon Villain x Stubborn Hero", or y'all could offer suggestions of your own :D

Villain Carewhumper x Stubborn Hero Whumpee part 20

Warnings: LIVING WEAPON VILLAIN, panic attack, aftermath of using weapon training gone horribly wrong

Which is why when she cautiously entered the basement with med kit in hand... she locked the door from the inside. So that neither Other Hero nor Friend could enter, no matter what they heard go down.

The lights were dim and flickering when she turned to descend the concrete stairs, barely illuminating the wreckage below. The table that once dominated the center of the room was smashed to splinters, and metal restraints laid cracked and broken apart around it, dusted with a thin sheen of frost.

Other Hero's large basement used to be used for temporary criminal containment, since Agency was such a far drive away. He was permitted to keep the villains he caught in it until he could find time to take them to Agency for proper processing. And now, it was the perfect place to keep Villain, where he couldn't break out even with his unnatural abilities. Though he'd clearly tried. Jagged patches of sharp ice dotted the solid concrete walls, evidence of his futile efforts to make them brittle enough to break through.

Hero's footsteps were light and uncertain as she reached the bottom of the stairs, eyes sweeping over the chaos until they settled on a figure pressed into the far corner, hunched on the floor and looking oh-so-small.

It was Villain. But she'd never seen him like this before; hands tangled in his hair, pulling at it and hyperventilating, doubled over on himself with his knees pulled to his chest and face hidden by them. He looked so utterly fragile. As if he were just a lost kid in a too-big carnival. Scared and alone. The furthest possible thing from dangerous.

He was whispering hysterically under his breath, and as she warily drew closer she caught the jumbled words spoken between ragged gasps.

"Stop, stop, no, can't, bad, help, help, no help, anger, can't do this, NO SIR--" He was rambling incoherent nonsense, just like Other Hero said. Trapped in a vicious cycle Hero couldn't see.

Villain Carewhumper x Stubborn Hero Whumpee part 19

Warnings: LIVING WEAPON VILLAIN, aftermath of Hero using living weapon training to take control of Villain who has accidentally been triggered to attack, mention of injuries from unknown origins

"Hero, whatever you 'using his weapon training' means, it messed him up bad. He is... not okay right now. I currently have him trapped in my fortified basement."

Hero frowned. "What? Why?"

"...He showed up on my doorstep covered in blood.” A pause followed, before, “I think most of it's his own, but I can't get him to talk to me and explain what happened. Something serious clearly went down after he left your place, and now he's just talking to himself and going in circles not making much sense." Other Hero's voice cracked with anxiety.

"I think he might have a concussion. I managed to lure him into the basement to keep him contained because I don't know how safe it is to be around him. It's like he's... glitching. I literally have no other way to describe it. You'd have to witness it yourself to see what I mean.”

"I'll come over right away," Hero announced resolutely. She'd contributed to this mess, so it was only fair that she helped clean it up too.

"Are you... not sick anymore?"

"I'm good enough to walk, and Friend's here with me. I'm fine."

"All right. See you in a bit then."

Hero ended the call, making eye contact with her friend from across the room.

"Grab your keys. We're going on a car ride.”

She explained the full situation to Friend on the way, and the whole rest of the trip passed in somber silence after that, all the way up to when they were pulling into Other Hero's driveway.

Hero was still a bit shaky on her legs, but fully capable of walking on her own by now, and she wasted no time hurrying up the stairs to the front door with Friend hot on her heels. She knocked hard, then made the mistake of glancing down. Her stomach gave a nauseating lurch when she realized there was a trail of blood leading up to where she was standing.

The door swung open barely two heartbeats later, and Hero barged in. "Where is he?" she asked urgently.

"Still in the basement," Other Hero replied. He grabbed her arm when she turned to head in that direction, a warning flashing in his eyes.

"You need a plan first. Villain's calmed down since he first arrived, but I wouldn't consider him fully stable yet. Don't be impulsive."

Hero nodded, heart pounding. She wanted nothing more than to rush down and apologize, figure out what sort of trouble he'd run into after fleeing her place and find a way to help -- but she needed to be careful, and not forget who Villain was. What he was.

Villain Carewhumper x Stubborn Hero Whumpee part 18

Warnings: LIVING WEAPON VILLAIN, Hero using living weapon training to take control of Villain who has accidentally been triggered to attack, loss of bodily autonomy, panic attack, loads of trauma and fear, near-death experience

"Asset 34b... at ease?"

Villain's hand twitched, and a blade of ice formed, his fingers closing around the hilt. His posture stiffened.

CRAAAAP. Hero lost her cool when he started stepping closer, the weapon in his hand glinting dangerously in the light. Wrong phrase.

"You no longer serve me -- I let you go -- STOP--" Her voice rose in pitch with fear as she threw out everything she could think of that could possibly stick. "VILLAIN, DON'T-- YOU ARE RELEASED! I RELEASE YOU!"

Her breath hitched when the sharp edge of Villain's blade skated across her vulnerable throat -- and stopped there, resting innocently over her racing pulse. She stared up into his eyes, and saw something she didn't expect to see -- terror. A distinct shift in the empty blankness from before. A faint sign of consciousness.

The last phrase she tried must have worked.

Neither of them moved, locked in sacred silence. Then Villain's ice blade abruptly vanished, and he jerked back as if burned, nearly tripping over himself.

He looked scared. Pupils dilating, gaze darting around the room like he expected an ambush. Every bit of his usual confidence and composure vanishing in a heartbeat.

"Villain," Hero started to say, about to reassure him. "It's okay--it wasn't your fau--"

"I can't do this again," Villain whispered, voice cracking with distress. He shook his head, grimacing -- then whipped around and bolted for the window.

"Villain, WAIT!" Hero tried to spring off the couch, and was half-successful, managing to balance on wobbly legs. But she couldn’t intervene in time before Villain flung the window open, vaulted over the edge, and vanished into the night without another word, leaving her standing in stunned silence.

Friend rushed to her side and grabbed her arm, stabilizing her before she had a chance to fall. The surprise had worn off of her features, a stern look replacing it. "You have a LOT of explaining to do," she growled.

"I do," Hero agreed quietly, staring numbly out the window. "I have a lot of explaining to do."

Villain Carewhumper x Stubborn Hero Whumpee part 17

Warnings: LIVING WEAPON VILLAINNNNN, Hero using living weapon training to take control of Villain who has accidentally been triggered to attack, loss of bodily autonomy

Decided to write a trope I haven't seen in the living weapon community yet: someone reluctantly using an ex-weapon's training to take control of them when they are being dangerously overprotective, even knowing it will traumatize the weapon deeply since the weapon thought their weapon days were over and that they were finally free of their past, having escaped their handlers years ago >:) And therefore shattering all trust and faith in one solid blow

"Asset 34b!!" Hero blurted shakily. Villain’s back was toward her, but she saw him stiffen at the title. She had his attention now, and that was a dangerous, potentially fatal place to be. No turning back.

She swallowed her terror and forced the words out. “Code 364 override, direct order, priority 1. Let her go, step back, stand down.”

Everything went still and silent for a frighteningly long moment. The world balancing on the tip of a knife.

Friend had stopped struggling in confusion, scared eyes darting between her and Villain.

Hero held her breath, heart pounding in her ears.

Three seconds. Three seconds of agonizing waiting, before slowly, Villain’s grip on Friend loosened.

Friend yanked her wrists out of his hold the instant she was able to, ducking around him and darting over to stand next to Hero's couch, wild-eyed with fear. Both friends stared at Villain's back to see what he’d do next, apprehensive.

He stayed facing the wall a little longer, as if he were still processing his surroundings, before slowly turning around to face them, eyes locking straight onto Hero.

Hero nearly shrank into herself under the sheer intensity of his full, undivided focus.

Villain’s pupils were constricted to twin pinpoints, a frighteningly vacant expression on his face. Utterly blank, devoid of all human emotion. Empty and soulless.

He walked over to the couch in slow, graceful strides, and Hero flattened herself against the cushions, recoiling.

The living weapon stopped two meters away, eerily tilting his head to the side and staring down at her intently. "Awaiting further instruction, sir," he monotoned, his voice flat and robotic.

Hero fought to keep the rising panic at bay, fear tightening her chest and making it hard to breathe.

“H-Hero, what the actual hell?” Friend whispered shakily. “Why is he–”

"Shhh!” Hero urgently shushed, and Friend snapped her mouth shut. She just needed a second to analyze the situation and figure out what to do.

Villain Carewhumper x Stubborn Hero Whumpee part 16

Warnings: Warnings: LIVING WEAPON VILLAIN, ambush, living weapon triggers being accidentally set off resulting in a dangerous situation, pinned to the wall

By the time early evening rolled around, she had given up on the idea of getting answers altogether.

Villain brought her her evening medications like usual, but abruptly stiffened when Hero took them from him, his eyes momentarily going out of focus. “Someone’s coming.”

Hero’s brow furrowed. “Wha–”

Villain was already in motion, his footsteps eerily silent as he quickly set the pill bottles on the nightstand and glided soundlessly over the floor to stand next to the front door with his back against the wall, every muscle coiled tight and ready for a fight.

“Whoa, hey, get away from there, it’s probably just a mailman, don’t attack them!” Hero barked.

“You have no way of knowing that for certain,” Villain growled in response, not budging from his position like a poised guard dog ready to tear an intruder apart. “Could be an enemy.”

“That’s the training talking,” Hero snapped. “No one besides Agency knows where I live.”

“Precisely. I am reacting accordingly.”

“That’s—That’s not what I meant. My coworkers at Agency don’t know that you’re here, they don’t know I know the truth, and they have no reason to suspect anything. If you attack them right now–”

Someone knocked loudly, the action followed by a voice Hero instantly recognized.

“Hero? Are you in there?”

It was Friend. One of her closest coworkers.

“I know you're a perfectly capable, independent woman,” the voice continued, “but you haven’t answered your phone in over a week, and I’m starting to get worried. You’ve never gone this long without texting me back before, and last I heard you were sick, so… even if I’m worrying for nothing, I’d like to see you, for my own peace of mind.”

Hero’s eyes widened with fresh panic. Things had been so hectic lately, she’d completely forgotten to check the messages on her phone. She’d turned off her notifications because it was giving her a headache, and never turned them back on. Crap.

“Villain, you have to hide.” she hissed urgently, voice dropping low. “She’s a friend, I promise. NOT enemy. Please stand down.”

Villain only tensed up further. “Friends can be compromised,” he whispered, quiet enough that the person at the door wouldn’t be able to hear. “If she leaves, I won’t pursue, but if she steps foot in here… I’m taking her out. Can’t risk her reporting back to Agency.”

Anonymous asked:

Cheeseburbur

HAMDOGGER

In memory of the time my sister dropped her hotdog and was distraught about it (only the meat itself was inedible since it hit the ground) and I was about to eat my hamburger, but gave her the meat from my burger instead to put in her hotdog bun and called it a "hamdogger" 🫡

Villain Carewhumper x Stubborn Hero Whumpee part 15

Warnings: LIVING WEAPON VILLAIN

'Strategy' was on the list of things Villain was built for. And he was darn good at it, making the necessary sacrifice to gain allies, even if it meant he was slower to fulfill his orders in the end.

"And... why me?" Hero asked next. "Why approach me specifically to ask about an alliance over any other hero?"

"Because, despite how infuriatingly stubborn and hot-headed you are, you have a golden moral compass. At the end of the day, you won't let your arrogance get in the way of doing what's right. And... someone else also vouched for you. Said I'd stand a decent chance of gaining your help."

"Wait -- what?? Who?"

Villain smirked. "Did you really think you were the only hero I've approached with this proposal? I've already gained the trust of one of your coworkers, and he said you would make the right choice if I came to you. He was clearly correct."

"Was it Other Hero?"

"Yup. He was an even harder sell than you are, but I won him over in the end.”

Hero closed her eyes with a defeated groan. She couldn't believe Other Hero would send Villain to her doorstep, given how dangerous he was. Even though he had mainly come to ask for help, Hero couldn't help feeling slightly betrayed that Other Hero didn't give her a heads up first. Even just a quick text.

Then again, if he had warned her in advance... she would have prepared for a fight and made sure Villain would be taken down the instant he stepped foot in her home. She wouldn't have heard him out if he hadn't shown up when she was at her weakest, caught off-guard.

Maybe that was the worst part -- that Other Hero knew her well enough to know that the only way to get her stubborn ass to listen was to force her into a situation where not listening wasn't even an option.

Villain Carewhumper x Stubborn Hero Whumpee part 14

Warnings: LIVING WEAPON VILLAIN, mention of faulty living weapon triggers that accidently got people killed

Villain grimaced. "The lead hero at the museum had no idea what they were doing. They probably caught a glimpse of Agency's file on me, saw the title, and figured I would respond to it -- which I did, but... not in the way they anticipated. And it got their whole team killed."

"You don't have any conscious thought when it's happening? You really can't stop yourself?" Hero bit her lip pensively.

"Sometimes yes... but often no. Conditioning kicks in before conscience does. By the time I register what I’m doing, it’s often too late. But, as a prototype, my training isn't perfect. There's times when I don't react to situations like I'm trained to, or falter unexpectedly. In those cases, I can control myself and avoid hurting anyone."

"Any other triggers besides your weapon name?" Hero asked, almost fearing the answer. "If we're going to work together... I'd like to know how to be safe around you. I'd rather keep my head attached to my shoulders. Heh."

"Is that a 'yes' to helping me, I infer?" Villain eyes glittered coldly.

Hero rolled her eyes hard. "Okay, fine, yes I'm interested in getting rid of the files too, now that I see how deadly those resources are. So yes, I will work with you. Now, triggers?"

Villain chuckled low in his throat, but his expression was serious. "The only big one you really have to worry about is touching me. Any sharp movements toward me could set me off. I can touch you without issue, but you cannot be the one to touch me.”

His lips twitched into a frown. "The danger there comes from the fact that I don't have a built-in threat scale like later versions. I don't meet force with equal force; I give all or nothing. That specific trait is faulty, so it's a 50/50 chance on whether I'll react and fight back or not, but when I defend myself, I will not be able to restrain my strength."

"So, when you first broke into my house and I slashed your arm..." Hero's gaze drifted to the bandages he still had.

"You got very, very lucky," Villain finished. "You should buy a lottery ticket. You survived death and didn't even know it.”

Villain Carewhumper x Stubborn Hero Whumpee part 13

Warnings: LIVING WEAPON VILLAIN, mention of past murder, mention of faulty living weapon triggers that accidently killed people, direct discussion of suicide (for the greater good)

Hero let out a long, slow exhale, and her sleep wasn't interrupted again the whole night.

-------------------------------------------------------

The next morning was a fresh start. She woke up to find that Villain had already made a healthy breakfast for her, and after eating it she had more questions to ask. Though she chose not to mention the nightmare.

"I believe you now," she said. "That... you're a weapon. Dang, that's still hard to wrap my head around. Do you remember how you were created?"

Villain tilted his head thoughtfully. "I do not recall. But from the documents I've seen, I used to be a regular human -- just enhanced, now. Turned into something... more. Something less breakable."

Hero shuddered, mind flashing back to the dream and how oddly strong she'd felt when she moved. Unnaturally so. As if she could run forever without tiring.

She shook her head to bring herself back to the present, noticing how Villain was watching her closely, an odd intensity in his gaze. She cleared her throat awkwardly, lying on her back on the couch and propping her ankles up on a pillow to rest. "So... this is not me agreeing to help you yet, but... what will you do if you win? If you successfully destroy any remnants of Project Warfell? Will you try to start a new life somewhere in the country and live out your days in a quaint cottage or something?"

Villain looked her dead in the eye, expression grim and hollow. "No," he answered, "when the research files are destroyed... I will die."

"HUH?" Hero barked in surprise, struggling to sit up before he placed a firm hand on her shoulder and lightly pinned her down. "What are you talking about?? If you plan it right, and if I helped you, I don't see why you wouldn't be able to make it out of this alive."

"That's not what I meant to imply," Villain laughed dryly. "I would be the end of me."

Hero frowned in confusion. "Why do you feel like you have to die when this is over?"

"I am an unfinished project," Villain explained calmly, as if it were the simplest thing ever. "I am... unstable at times. Unpredictable. And with the abilities Agency gave me... I am too dangerous to be kept around. I only want to see this through to the end, ensure Agency's weapon research is thoroughly destroyed, and then I will destroy the last piece of that research -- me."

Villain Carewhumper x Stubborn Hero Whumpee part 12

Warnings: LIVING WEAPON VILLAIN, bullet wounds, relived memory, bullet wounds, murder, corrupt heroes, nightmares, living weapon protocols

She heard Handler shriek in pain behind her, but didn’t look, obeying the last order.

The shadows swallowed her whole when she reached the edge of the city, where the spotlights couldn’t stay on her any longer. Only then did she dare stop and turn to look back, now that she was safe, the order loosening its grip. Her heart sank when she saw Handler sprawled on his back in the grass, bleeding badly as a cluster of officers ran over to him, rifles kept trained on him.

The distinct figure of Superhero stepped forward from the group, and even from a distance, Hero could tell he was pissed. She strained her ears, quieting her ragged breaths in an attempt to listen in on what was happening.

“Why did you do it, Handler?” Superhero's angry voice reached her. “Why’d you become a traitor?”

“You created monsters,” Handler rasped weakly, pain lacing his tone. “And I just saved you from making a huge mistake with them. You would have gotten many people killed.”

“You ruined decades of research!” Superhero roared, and viciously kicked the fallen man in the ribs, tearing a strangled cry from his throat. “Do you know how long it took the scientists to come up with those designs??”

“The knowledge… is better lost… than in.. anyone's hands,” Handler wheezed.

“You're a fool to believe that.”

“Perhaps… but I am an educated fool.”

Superhero grabbed a handgun from an officer on his left, cocking it and leveling it at Handler’s head in one fluid motion. “You were such a good agent, too,” he tsked. “Now I am left with the bare basic scraps of blueprints to go off of thanks to your idiocy.”

The crackle of a radio sounded, and while Hero couldn’t pick up what came through it, she did catch what the man who it belonged to said.

“All the Project Warfell weapons have been found deceased,” he informed grimly. “One body’s missing though. 34b.”

Superhero’s face paled, the full force of his fury directed at Handler. “Where is 34b?” he snarled. “What did you do with it?”

Handler stared past the gun’s barrel and locked eyes with Superhero, unafraid. “He has his orders," he said with a threatening smile, “and let’s just say… he hunts better than you hide.”

Anonymous asked:

Sometimes your writing will make me giggle like a maniac if no one else is in the room with me

I find this ask highly amusing and relatable because I giggle like a maniac WHILE I'M WRITING THOSE STORIES if no one else is in the room with me 🤣

So, saaaaaame 🫡

Anonymous asked:

I JUST STARTED READING THE VILLAIN CAREWHUMPER SERIES AFTER PUTTING IT OFF FOR A WHILE AND VILLAIN IS SO PATHETIC AND CUTE (in a non romantic way) WHEN EXPLAINING WHY HE STABBED HERO AAAA

AHHHHHHHHHH I WHOLEHEARTEDLY AGREE WITH THIS STATEMENT XDDDD

VILLAIN IS SUCH AN AWKWARD DORK ABOUT IT LOLOLOL

Villain Carewhumper x Stubborn Hero Whumpee part 11

Warnings: LIVING WEAPON VILLAIN, murders, lots of blood, relived memory, bullet wounds, living weapon gone rogue

An icy shiver ran up Hero’s spine, the command slipping past authorized mental barricades and lodging itself deep into her mind. She wasn’t supposed to take orders from unauthorized personnel. Unless they used a failsafe code.

“I understand,” she said, and slipped the drive into a pocket.

“Good.” Handler nodded approvingly, stepping past her and walking straight over to the nearest table – one full of beakers with unknown liquids – and started swiping things onto the floor, smashing glass and destroying anything he could reach. “Stand watch, alert me if anyone is coming.”

Hero stood rigidly posted at the door as requested, the sound of shattering glass and ripping paper filling the air behind her. But then a sound came from in front of her, and her hypersensitive ears locked in on it. It was far away in the distance, but unmistakably boots on gravel. Several pairs. The clink of guns and body armor accompanying it.

“Activity at West entrance,” she informed, turning back to face the wreckage. “Military. Silent alarm must have gone off. They are fully armed.”

Handler let out a string of curses under his breath, a mess of scattered, ruined research papers and files soaked in blood and chemicals strewn everywhere amongst the lifeless weapons on the floor.

“I haven’t found the main file yet,” he hissed angrily. “But we’re out of time. We’ll have to come back and search for it another day. It’ll be harder to infiltrate this place now that the element of surprise is gone, but it’s our only chance. Run.”