junior year!

i haven't written in FOREVER. lol. bunch has been happening.

Jay is gone, back to JerZ. as i told Amanda this morning, i am fine as possible, and know we will be fine, and its not like hes dead. aka-- i am in physical pain because a part of me is missing and i am trying my best to hold myself together, but I am sure its gonna slip out at some point.

she told me to not worry about it, not try to hide it all. i agree. but its easier and less stressful to throw myself into other things 1000%.

i think this weekend will be the first test. first weekend without him in a while. makes me happy i have made at least a few friends here in NC.

classes are all really good. first time that has happened in my years here. lol. which is tre good. i think things could def be a lot worse.

oy. i hope maybe, that all this happiness will one day be 100% genuine, but for now... ill take what i can get.

now back to the girly tv shows!

love you all. some more than others.