It's been a long time since I last wrote in here..... wow.... so much has happened since college started.
I wonder if I've changed. I think I have, perhaps a bit, but I am not judge of myself since I spent my entire life with myself change is hard to note. I think college will provide a lot of opportunities for growth, I just hope I find them. Time to test my independence will be good, see how well I can stand on my own. I guess that's one of the weirdest parts of college, feeling alone. Not because people are ignoring me, but that these are all new friends. I miss people who have known me for years where the relationship is so casual I don't need to think about it. Simple trust. But time should hopefully fix that.
Life is good overall, things have settled down now from the original hype... all the new things and experiences, tango, swing, new church, rock climbing, hiking.... but I have settled into a routine and am doing some of those fun things less often as finals approach. I am really looking forward to winter break. A month with no homework to visit family, see friends, sleep, Christmas, go hiking, play with the dog.... to just relax and refresh full before tackling another semester.
Well, I am losing it, time for bed, perhaps I will remember to write more later...... we'll see......
Here I am, in my new home, my dorm room, room 311A, in Quad B, at MSU, in Bozeman, Montana.
Band Camp is okay, not the most exciting, but I think I am starting to make a couple friends. The first couple days were brutal, but they've eased up a little.
On Monday classes will start. It's coming fast! Wow. I am excited and am looking forward to meeting my classmates. Sadly, my room mate has not arrived. The two other girls who share the same study room with me have started moving in, but they aren't sleeping here yet. They seem to be okay.
Well I think I may go eat soonish as I am starting to get hungry....
I am now in my last few days here. It is becoming an increasingly stressful time as I realize how much there still is to do, and to add on, more friends keep calling wanting to spend a few last minutes together before I run of to college and I hate saying no to them. Most people I did get a chance to spend time with, but some were gone when I was free and now that I am really busy, now they have available time.
It feels so weird to think about leaving for so long. It is hard to pack away some of my special things, like a rock from my grandpa and other sentiental items, and put them in the attic where I will likely not see them for 4 years. The funny thing is, I don't really pay that much attention to them when they are readily available, but it is fun to go and look at such things and remember whatever special memory they are attached to. But suddenly it is hard to put them out of sight, even though I often wouldn't look at some of them for a couple years. Gah, I am too attached to some of my stuff!
But I am very excited nevertheless. There seems to be so much to do in Bozeman and the surrounding area, I can hardly wait. I leave Friday to open a new door in my life. To be independent, make my ow choices. Wow...... so soon!
Well, I should really go and continue working and packing and cleaning and getting otherwise ready to go.
Wow, my life has been so busy lately!! This summer is running away fast!!! There are just under 3 weeks standing between me and college!!! The biggest change of my life so far is so close...... It feels so weird to think that Bozeman will be home, that I will be living hundreds of miles from here, that my family will be far from me, my friends as well. I will be starteing over in a new place, with new faces, new things to do, incredible freedom relative to living with parents. I am so excited and yet slightly nervous. I don't want to leave my friends. To not see my best friend for months on end. To likely never see some of my friends again. To never again truly call this house, my bedroom, home. But it's all for good. The mountains of Montana, the learning of the university are calling to me. And I am getting ready to answer.
I've been out of school for 2 weeks now and it feels great. I've been sleeping so much, I think I'm finally returning to a normal healthy state. Now I need to start being active and regain my physical fitness after way too much time spent sitting in class, studying, doing homework, etc. It feels so great to be FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!! No more high school!!!!!!!!!
I had my personal grad party on Sunday and it was one of the happiest days of my life. There were so many friends and family who came, more than I expected. I saw old friends who I hadn't seen in while. Even Carl and Gary came with a bouquet of flowers (I still can't get over that!). It was so fun to talk to the old Crew members; I didn't realize how much I missed that group. My mom invited Steve and Cole Kingsbury as a surprise. It was good to see them again, too. Wow, I wish it could have gone longer..... so I could have talked more with everyone there. As is, my last family members didn't leave until 9pm (even though the party technically ended at 5pm!)
Monday was graduation. The ceremony was ok..... the speaker ran kinda long...... if he had cut off a few minutes earlier, it would have been amazing...... but oh well...... now I am officially a BHD alumus!
Then came grad night which was held in Vancouver. It was a crazy night filled with swimming, food (more food than I have ever seen at a party and you could have as much as you wanted!!!!!), a magician, caricature artists, a mechanical bull, and so much more. The night ended with a hypnotist which was hilarious!!!!! It's still hard to figure out who wasn't really in it and was faking and who was really under..... a couple people you could really tell were hypnotized because they would never have done what they did (like being a cheerleader!)
I spent Tuesday with Kobuk watching a movie, talking, walked to the Asain market to buy sticky rice for my mom, wrestling, and such. It was fun, but I was tired running on 3 hours of sleep.
Yesterday I saw X-Men III which was too short for all they put into it. Still, it was a good movie and very sad. Other than that, yesterday was rather boring.....
So far today is boring as well. I don't have anything planned other than baby-sitting from 5-10pm. Oh well. I'm guessing I'll finish thank you cards for the graduation gifts, and find something else productive to do.
But, I do have the annual family backpack trip to look forward too!! It starts on Saturday!!!!!!
1 test left to go.... Tuesday and Wednesday..... for IB Psychology.... THEN I AM FREEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!
But I won't stop being busy....
Engish paper —> reflective essay on my 12 years of school Psych project —> psychology of risk takers (esp. climbers!) Physics —> Airplane competition
May 20th —> Service Project, removing invasive species May 21st —> Climbing Mt. Hood May 24th —> Band, Senior Roast, awards May 25th —> Band concert May 26-27th —> Square dancing May 28-29th —> Backpacking June 1st —> last day of school June 4th —> climbing the Tooth June 5-7th —> IB camping trip June 10th —> Grand Floral Parade, band June 12th —> Graduation
IB/AP testing is in progress...... I have survived one week...... 2.5 weeks left to go....... *sigh*..... I'm so sick of tests already...... seems like such a long time..... and the more I take the harder it is to focus and study..... I hope it doesn't ruin my grades...... including the 3 AP tests from the last 2 years, I think we've paid over $1000 for these tests, so I want to do well, but right now all I want to do is sleep, climb, just about anything but more long hours of studying, stressing, and test taking...... plus the normal homework and chores......
1. I'll respond with something random I like about you. 2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you. 3. I'll name something we should do together. 4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me (or just me). 5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you. 6. I'll leave you a quote that is somehow appropriate to you. 7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you. 8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal so you can do the same for other people.
Had a great time at Smith Rocks...... it snowed on us the first day...... very cold and snowy (like 2 inches).... the next day it was sunny and warm.... the next day felt hot! I climbed better than the last time..... I got 8.5 routes done and 1 rappel..... all of them I climbed clean except for 1.5 routes...... it was very good...... I can climb clean up to about a 5.7...... beyond that things get iffy...... but it was lots of climbing and hiking, tent parties, little sleep, etc. Very crazy and fun......
Then I went to the beach the next day with my family....... and Kobuk........ it was nice to be able to spend that much time with Kobuk, though we got teased to no end even for just sitting close to one another......
Yesterday was devoted to this application for some cool summer program called Girls on Ice that involves studying glaciology on Mt. Baker.....
Today was taxes and chores, followed by lunch with Eric @ 2 (that was very fun, by the way..... Eric - we need to get together more often, but it was very nice to talk to you in person, and eat yummy Thai food and Cold Stone!)....... and then I saw Ice Age 2 with Kobuk.....
Tomorrow is a family cross country ski trip, then quickly changing to go square dancing...... get home about 11pm.....
Sunday is a hike up Dog Mountain, followed in the evening by homework and some more chores.....
Then Monday is school..... and Model UN after school...... planning a service project...... doing some homework.... and then going to a Post leadership meeting.....
I'm going to be very tired..... but it should be fun and exciting...... yay for business......
tired
thoughtful
content