Coach her the same as everyone else. If it gets deep or theological, keep in your background awareness that Catholicism is a religion of sacrament and ritual, like some versions of Tantra. Material actions and touches and movements are actually God working miracles using his people's bodies, hands and voices -- their muscles. Sex is a sacrament in traditional Catholic Theology, and while some may object to restricting it to mutual monogamy, all should benefit by learning to feel God in this sacrament.
Yes! Like can we receive from life too... I had a client reach out offering sales today and i was so surprised, like wow what a gift from the universe and then it challenged my havingness. I saw little ways I started to try to sabatoge it, like not responding right away or dismissing the offer. So then I'm like ok, can I open more here?
What I got from today's call is how much my reception is key to a mans ability to show up, provide, and succeed in any role he's in. If I'm doubtful, cut off, judging, critical or withdrawn, he can't be amazing in the ways that are possible. My open reception is necessary for his greatness to arise.
I want a stable life that I'm happy in and don't try to run away from. I want to be happy I want Gwen to feel safe
Start a poly lifestyle coaching circle, see another family house in action, establish a group for kids for gwen. Hopefully have my house, job and friends all be closer. Establish Community dinner s.
So, a list of things I am passionate about: good sex, self-respect, child rearing, self-sufficiency / off the grid, growth and approval at all ages, self-expression, community, inclusion, design / permaculture
And, I want my income to come from things that I am passionate about, or easy things that I already do.
And, I think a lot of my struggle comes from being unwilling to set boundaries. I let my time be leaked away, and then don't devote myself to meaningful projects. I need more practice holding my boundaries.
There is a lot of conversation in my circles about higher purpose, finding your purpose, serving your higher purpose. I think it maybe rings hollow because on some level I feel like we are all just bags of (really cool, extremely complex) chemicals, albeit struggling from advanced cognition, meta-cognition, and limbic sensitivity.
On another level, I think we are all faces of God, trying to fight our way to self-awareness (the creation of our self). And in that latter conception, there is certainly space for me to speed the process, to help at my most effective. What does that look like? What am I best equipped to bring to society, to humanity, to speed our race to enlightenment?
I'd like to remind everyone that we are meant to live in community, that it makes us feel safe and free and at home. Even though people are assholes. And I am particularly well equipped to manage people, to hold space for them, for their feelings, to add pressure and heat with precision. (and I have charge around admitting I'm doing it.) I have oodles of approval. I have joy for life, and fucking.
The challenging thing, I suspect, is that I have such great perpective, such "two sides of the coin" view, that I can't nail down just one side of what I want my purpose to look like.
Maybe I just need to start mapping the different sides of the dodecahedron. Look big, small, and multi.
I'm headed back to San Angelo, after having destroyed my savings, my relationship to Lorenzo, and having my daughter experience life in a tent.
Good times, good times.
The east coast is pretty chill. It's big, and I didn't take advantage of all the cool things here,didn't explore as much as I ought, all in all a great learning experience, I will keep learning, learning, learning.
I don't know what I'm going to do without these people. I am sad to be losing them, even though, just like Lorenzo, I would never deny someone an opportunity. I think both of them will be much happier... all three, I suppose.
Just scared to be left alone. Even if it means more time and less distractions. I worry about raising my daughter on my own. And, it's sad to lose the company of people you care about.
I guess it's true-- never trust someone else to do something you really need done. I don't know why I imagine people are generally competent, and I don't know how to do a better job of getting results from people. I guess I need to reign in my dreams, knowing I have to do every piece by hand. Ugh. Especially because I have all the foibles of a person, too; lack of timeliness, mismatched priorities, etc. I better make a ton of money, to be able to fix failures to plan.
But really-- I left a householder at my house, who is ostensibly my personal assistant, but at teh very least my roomate, and I asked on Friday-- hey, can you upload my resume? Done! Except, the old version, that he typed up, with spelling errors, that I worked on for another 5-6 hours improving. 10 min later, I ask-- thanks, that's great, can you upload the new, corrected version? I included the filename. It's in the same folder. Sat, nothing. Sunday, nothing. Monday, I fly home to be able to do it myself (he had asked if there was any way I could leave the computer at home, so he could make electronic music while I was gone...) -- Because I live in Hawai'i, the deadline had passed...
Still working on a routine in tx. The military just has too many boys. !!! I am definitely a self-proclaimed cougar now, picking up the baby 21 year olds
Plus, torn away from the one I really want. At least for a year. Oh, how the military wrecks havoc on interpersonal relations.
This is going to be my scribble box for chinese, unless i start to find the updating too hard.. maybe twitter? I have a ton of things to say in chinese, practice wise.. Twitter.
anxious