baby, you've got to be more discerning.

hey, thanks! i appreciate it.

Happy 18th Birthday, Kirstie! I loveeeee youuuuu!

so, i worked this morning. and near the end of my shift, i heard someone call my name from table 45. it was paula's parents, anne and terry. we made small talk for a little while, blah blah blah, until terry said "so, kiddo, what do you think about your dad?"

i didn't know what he was talking about.
"what do you mean exactly?"
"you didn't hear what happened to him?"
"uh, no. what happened?"
"he was robbed at GUN POINT at work a couple days ago."
i didn't know if was serious or not. but he was. apparently, it happened early in the morning, and my dad and one of his drivers [he works at badcock's as a manager, fyi] were working. i guess his driver came back from a delivery and the robber followed him in the store through the back. the guy shoved a gun in my dad's face and told him to empty out their safe. the guy had the gun in my dad's back the whole time he was getting the money out of the safe. after he was done, he made my dad and the driver lay on their stomaches and put their hands on their heads in the stockroom. dad thought then that's when he was going to shoot them both. but the robber took off. he only went away with $3,000. my dad couldn't identify him because he was wearing a ski mask and gloves.

i nearly lost it in front of everyone in the dining room. i made the rest of the conversation short and mainly stayed in the kitchen until my shift was over.

i called kirst on the way home to tell her what happened, and she called dad at work and asked him why he didn't tell us what happened. he was pretty upset that terry told me what happened, because he didn't want kirstie and me to worry about him. but he told her that it was the scariest moment in his entire life. and kirstie said "it was the scariest moment of my life, too!" and then dad started crying a little bit and told her that all he thought about was us and that he just wanted to see us one last time. so that's when i lost it. in the car on the way home from work.

i love my dad so much. i don't get to see him nearly as much as i should, but we have a great relationship now. i won't ever take him [or anyone else for that matter] for granted ever again. i am so so relieved that he is okay. i don't know what i would do if i lost him.

i understand why he didn't want to tell us, because i am scared to death for everyone's safety now. it's all i have thought about since i was told about it.

but my dad is safe, and that's all that matters. i can't wait to see him and tell him how much i love him.

To be lost in the forest
To be cut adrift
You've been trying to reach me
You bought me a book
To be lost in the forest
To be cut adrift
I've been paid
I've been paid

Don't get offended
If I seem absent minded
Just keep telling me facts
And keep making me smile
Don't get offended
If I seem absent minded
I get tongue-tied
Baby, you've got to be more discerning
I've never known what's good for me
I will be yours

I'll pay for you anytime

You told me you wanted to eat up my sadness
Well jump on, enjoy, you can gorge away
You told me you wanted to eat up my sadness
Jump right on
Baby, you've got to be more discerning
I've never known what's good for me
Baby, you've got to be more demanding
I will be yours

What are you holding out for?
What's always in the way?
Why so damn absent-minded?
Why so scared of romance?

This modern love breaks me
This modern love wastes me

Do you wanna come over and kill some time?
Tell me facts, tell me facts, tell me facts
Tell me facts
Throw your arms around me

If you comment here:

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Try to Remember, Forget. by Say Anything-
It is my birthday. It is a new year. I should be happy that i am still here.
Light up a new joint. Put on an old shirt. Try to remember but forget how my brain works.
But i could read a book a night before this year.
I knew every word, their definitions clear
But now in stealth i check thesaurus- it's become my guilty mistress.
So i heave my breath at burning wax because i know that spark ain't coming back.
It is my birthday. I've got all my friends here.
They haven't been talking as of lately. They've all found new bro's and babies.
I have smoked away my pride.
There is nothing but the cinders of it inside.
But i believed in more than nothingness last year and under every quiet failure it's still here.
Buried breathing under 18 years of tragedy and fear.
If i could crawl my way out of this grave just think of all the time i'd save.
The stereo's playing the same old songs and we still hum along
And in no time we'll be spread across the earth,
Donning business suits to show the faceless master what we're worth.
From our Huggies to Armani and it all seems so rehearsed.

so, i applied at both of the vets offices today. i don't think i have a shot at the first one, considering a little old lady was applying at the same time as me, and has probably done office work a majority of her life. so whatev.

i really hope that i get it at the second clinic i went to. everyone seems to be really young and nice. and the assistant that i saw today was quiteeee attractive. the receptionist asked if i could come in tomorrow, but i'm a double at work, so i told her i couldn't. then she asked if i left a phone number, and i said yes, and she said that they'd give me a call. so i dunno if that's a good or bad thing. i really hope they call. i'd really like to have a laid-back, non- hectic job. it would be nice.

i went by jamie's house today and checked out her new car. it's pretty killer. my little girl is all grown up... getting her very first car. awww.

my birthday is next tuesday! i need ideas on where to go and what to do! i'll be 21!!! eeee! so exciting!

i'm off to bed. goodnight.

so, i had today off of work. and tomorrow as well. and i have done absolutely nothing. i went to plato's closet and ross and marshall's with mom and tink today, and the only things i got were a bracelet and some marc jacobs perfume from marshall's. i saw some really cute high heels at marshall's as well, but i doubt i'll ever wear them, so i didn't get them.

i signed up for netflix the other night because i spend too much in late fees at movie gallery.

i rented good night and good luck and match point the other night as well. good night and good luck was boring, but match point was really good.

i finally saw that wes anderson american express commercial on tv yesterday.

umm, so if anyone is up for hanging out tomorrow, let me know. i'm bored.

goodnight.