I hate when I say things like "oh I want an ipod classic but with bluetooth so I can use wireless headphones" and some peanut comes in and replies with "so a smartphone with spotify?" No. I want a 160GB+ rectangular monstrosity where I can download every version of every song I want to it and it does nothing except play music and I don't need a data connection and don't have to pay a subscription to not have ads and don't have popups suggesting terrible AI playlists all over the menus.

Gimme the clicky wheel and song titles like "My Chemical Romance- The Black Parade- Blood (Bonus Track)- secret track- album rip- high quality"

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One of my old employers contacted me today for a paid campaign and I had to (sadly) turn it down coz I have a (for now) a permanent job (whatever that means) and I asked if she'd be interested if I talk to my brothers about it coz they could really use the money- those college going Broke Bois™- and she says 'Uhh...okay sure.' you don't sound so sure. She goes 'I don't have anything against men but any man I've worked with under this portfolio, they all have left because none of them had the patience to talk to clients.'

And suddenly I was taken back to the time when I had to talk to men in my salesperson voice™ while being creeped out in my guts by the way most of them talked to me or complained, or even harrassed me just because;

And I was like 'you know what, I understand.'

Anonymous asked:

If you're still taking writing requests, could we get a cute AU one of Young Ford bringing Fiddleford home for the first time and Ma Pines embarrassing her little Fordsy by showing off baby photos and childhood secrets, then Stan shows up making the embarrassment worse for his twin?

Yes, I am totally all for this. Hope you also don’t mind that I just need little Fidds to be a sass even as a child. And I love the little AU where Fidds grew up with the twins in Jersey. All for the happy AUs.
Not sure how old they are here, maybe like early teens? That’s like the worst time to be embarrassed by moms. Hope you like it!
Word count: 523

“Ma!” Ford shirked, his voice cracking slightly as he dragged two 6-fingered hands down his face. “You don’t need to do this!”

“Oh hush, Stanford,” she patted his head. “I haven’t had anyone to show off these pictures in a long time and your little friend here wanted to see them.”

“You don’t have to do this. We can just go up to my room. I have the books you wanted to look at and all.” He turned to Fiddleford hoping he would just politely decline his mother’s offer and they can leave.

But his new friend was not having that and had what Ford could only think of as a ‘devilish grin.’

“Ah come on, Ford, ya know I just moved here,” he turned to Ma Pines. “I would love to see those photographs, Ms. Pines.”

“Oh, your little friend is such a sweetie, I love him. You can come over to visit whenever you want, hun.” She went to go fetch her albums leaving the boys to wait on the couch.

“You are doing this on purpose,” Ford turned to his friend. “You have betrayed my trust, how could you?”

Fiddleford laughed. “Don’t look like that, Ford! Now when my mom asks about looking at baby photos, you don’t have to say ‘no’ and I really do want to see if there are any little secrets I should know about.”

“THERE ARE NO SECRETS!” Ford yelled a little too loud. His cheeks were bright red and that just made Fidds laugh more.

“Don’t go yelling at your friend, Stanford,” she came back into the room with a small book in her hands. She sat down next to Fidds opening it to the first page. “I’m only showing the first ones so don’t go being a grumpy fish.”

For almost 20 minutes Ford’s ma and Fiddleford were looking at old photos of him and Stanley as babies, but boy, did Ford feel like he was there for days. His face was bright red as he tried his hardest to ignore the giggles coming from their direction. He only feared the worst as the hands on the wall clock click by too slowly for him.

He was about to get up to go hide in the bathroom when the door swung open.

“This is where you went!” Stanley yelled. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you and you were just at home the whole time! You said you’d wait for me.” he looked over to see Fiddleford looking through some of Ma’s photographs. “Ah, I see.”

“Sorry, Stan, but Fidds wanted to see some of the books I got from the library and then Ma came in and it just went downhill from there.” Ford rubbed his arm. “We were gonna be back by the time you got out of -”

Stan quickly covered his mouth shushing him. “Quiet. Ma don’t need to know!” Stan whispered before letting him go.

“So, whatcha looking at Fiddlesticks? You get to the pictures of Ford in a little pink bunny suit? That one’s my favorite.”

Ford groaned putting his face in his hands refusing to look up.

my beautiful beloved phone case finally kicked the bucket, torn in two.

it wasnt really all that considering i bought it for twenty bucks at like. best buy. but it survived two screen protectors, being dropped no less than fifty times from questionable heights and probably deserved its psych degree too considering it took me all the way through college. the actual back of the case was disconnected from the rubber outside piece for years and clicked all the time in and out of place. my nice keychain was on that.

godspeed kate spade phone case. i hope you find peace in valhalla