no but imagine being the Palmetto State track team coach and learning about this kid who can run a mile in four minutes and so you go and check it out but surprise surprise the exy coach from the shit exy team has him already so you try to negotiate for the player because he might be the fastest kid you’ve ever seen but the exy coach keeps saying no and no and so you watch this kid that can RUN THE MILE IN FOUR MINUTES become the fastest exy player in history and you’re sobbing falling to your knees because you could’ve had him in the track team winning you gold medals in the olympics but instead you just stare from your campus office as this redhead short exy obsessed kid runs laps around the entire uni campus for hours on end without getting tired and just wishes all hell on exy