Admittedly I think the line between gender dysphoria and body dysmorphia is kinda fake and basically just drawing a line between "this is a Gender Thing it's ok to actively reach for" and "this is something you should just get over" when really I think everyone in the world should look how they want to look and the fact that this isn't possible is one of the many deep cruelties of reality
but w/e
like, idk!
i am not "a femboy", but i am someone who considers myself transfem without considering "being a woman" to be something i get anything out of?
i'm ok with it for like, political reasons (i.e. if i see a man being misogynistic (or specifically transmisogynistic) toward women i identify far more with the victims than the man) and personal reasons (i.e. i am ok with my friends and girlfriends and such calling me a girl), but like... the amount of personal joy or enrichment i get out of it hovers somewhere between "none" and "a little"
(really, if it happens too much it quickly becomes more "an irritation i am willing to endure" than anything...)
and on the other hand boyhood is like, a thing i do actually consider part of myself, to an extent. like, i enjoy it a lot when the circumstances are right, even if when the circumstances are wrong i can't fucking stand it.
and like... with the way some of y'all talk about this stuff it's really hard not to go "oh, ok, an honest and full representation of my gender in a character would be 1. read as a femboy (which i'm (mostly?) fine with) and 2. immediately hated by many trans women for existing (which i am... less fine with.)"
and y'know, i try not to make this other people's problem too much. but good god is that not reciprocated.
no wonder at all i can't consider myself properly transfem half the time. how frustrating.
My inability to feel welcome in any kind of trans space as someone who's vaguely transfem-ish but not a woman vs. "nah man, your're just being paranoid, those are your sisters in this surely, you share a community :D"
but here comes "oh no nevermind here's them being awful for real, not imagined at all :(" with a steel chair
i love seeing that "there's a word for when you identify with your assigned birth gender and some of you aren't gonna like it" post
i keep seeing it like right after thinking about how i'm really only comfortable being called a girl or w/e if it comes along also being considered a boy, and it does a good job reminding me that's bad and i should stop
