Democratic and Republican leaders, in an unheard-of display of bipartisanship, gathered in the Oval Office yesterday as President Donald Trump signed an executive order directing the Department of Education to oversee the removal of the word “problem” from all mathematics instructional materials and its replacement with the word “issue” by Christmas. Trump said that students will now work on word…
Asperity Falls, Ga.–Billionaire mortuary magnates Daley Ketcham and Dewey Burnham of Ketcham & Burnham Mortuaries, LLC, announced yesterday that they will spend $250 million on a nationwide campaign to combat the use of the expression “reach out” as it is now commonly employed to mean contacting or attempting to contact someone. “We are proud of our profession,” Ketcham said, “and ‘reach out’…
Former President Barack Obama and former Ku Klux Klan hierarch David Duke announced yesterday that they are joining forces to combat the excessive use of the word “like” in everyday conversation. Duke said the initiative had come from Obama and had surprised him. “At first I thought it was a practical joke when somebody purporting to be Barack Obama got in touch,” Duke said. “Once he got me to…
Every single time I hear my sister say "Oh My Word!" instead of "Oh My God!", I get so annoyed, I don't even know why. It's like those irrational fears, except I'm more on the angry-ish side than scared.
And I just have one of those Regina George moments when I want to turn around and say
"Stop trying to make OMW happen. It's not going to happen."
And then I remember I'm not the Queen Bee :P
