I am constantly torn between “it’s crazy that we vet adoptive parents so harshly but let people get pregnant and have babies and then have total rights over the resulting human beings with no oversight or vetting at all, there are definitely a lot of people who should never have been allowed to have kids because they are in no way fit to be parents, we should vet everyone who wants to be a parent to see if they’re a safe person to raise a child” and “we can’t let the government decide who can have kids because that’s eugenics and it’s definitely going to be affected by bigotry” and it just drives me crazy that there doesn’t seem to be any sort of solution to this problem except for the idea that maybe kids should have more rights and parents should have fewer rights but if I ever say that then I get killed by an angry mob immediately
Adultism (and maybe saneism) is our therapist we had during elementary school not referring me to being tested for depression despite suspecting it because we were “too young” and instead testing me for cyclothymia because our father has bipolar disorder. (spoiler alert: We have depression, got diagnosed with the very next medical professional we went to and we’re on an SSRI and lost a year of our life because she wouldn’t treat us for the underlying cause of our anger issues ^^)
Fun fact we’re so depression multiple medical professionals have said they usually don’t diagnose depression at our age but we’re so depressed they break the rule 😭😭😭
This is adultism and saneism, specifically depressomisia.
Thinking I've finally made a friend, but uh oh! They're 2 grades ahead! To them, this means that it's suddenly okay to refer to me as a baby or child or even their child despite the fact that there's little to no gap in our maturity levels! Hell, I've even seen them in more petty drama than some people in my grade. I had to drop them immediately because it disgusted me to my core only for my mother to tell me that kind of behavior is why I don't have friends.
Being referred to or seen as family by anyone I'm not related to is triggering and extremely uncomfortable. Being infantilized is also extremely uncomfortable on account of my agelessness (<- nonhuman)! I felt betrayed! I don't have any friends because they keep doing things like that and I leave because I know they'll think I'm being weird and start telling people.
This is ageism!
Mfw my mom had/has TWO spyware apps on my phone that she PAYS FOR AT LEAST ONE OF to keep her child from "not being safe on the internet" like i swear all the time she has never caught anything that has been unsafe and although i can see where she can be getting at occasionally it also collects ALL OF MY FUCKING DATA
This is adultism and surveillance culture.
The Tech Worker Blues: The future of aging out Ageism is a multiplier, addressing it has to be woven into whatever work companies are already doing on race and gender equity, or it will keep quietly undoing that work for everyone as they age into it. https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/tech-worker-blues-future-aging-out-jason-cranford-teague-0tmpe/
i think it’s actually really fucked up how little people care about teenagers’ mental health if it doesn’t affect their grades.
like i was actively going through Hell for 1.5 years, and have been passively going through Hell since then cause i just crashed once it was over and don’t have the energy to pick it all up again, and the only accommodations i got were a pair of noise-cancelling headphones i bought of my own account (which i am not allowed to use during tests, when noise distracts me most) and one “low stimulation room” during the Big Event, which was not furnished in any comfortable way and which i was routinely kicked out of so people could use it for other stuff.
but when i got so overwhelmed i started missing tests, that was when the intervention came. when i couldn’t turn in projects cause i didn’t work on them, cause every day when i came home from school i could do nothing but sit on the couch and doomscroll because i barely had the energy to talk. THATS when i got a card that can let me out of lessons to destress and a decreased amount of lesson time.
it just feels fucked to me. i wasn’t doing well. i was really shitty to be around and i was shut down for 80% of every day, i refuse to believe no one noticed that. it’s just that i still kept scoring 7s and 8s on tests so “surely it wasn’t that bad”.
When they want to feel powerful, they perceive you as incompetent in order to justify bossing you around.
When they want something from you, they perceive you as competent in order to justify expecting things of you with complete disregard for whether the expectations are reasonable.
They flip-flop between seeing you as competent and incompetent as many times as they want.
When you're a child and/or disabled, this happens to you a lot.
SRS POST CUZ IM PISSED THE HELL OFF ACTUALLY
I JUST FOUND OUT TODAY, LIKE RIGHT NOW, THAT THE LEGAL ADULT AGE IN BRITISH COLOMBIA IS 19, BROUGHT DOWN FROM 21 BUT NOT TO 18 LIKE THE REST OF THE WORLD (AND THE REST OF CANADA?????) BECAUSE, AND I QUOTE FROM WHAT I WAS TOLD, "TO KEEP HIGH SCHOOLERS OUT OF ADULT SPACES"
I CAN'T EVEN. FUCKING. IM ALMOST OUT OF STEAM TO EVEN ARGUE ABOUT THIS AT THIS POINT. AND AS MUCH AS I COULD JOKE ABOUT "GUYZ WE STILL HAVE A CHANCE IN BC🙏🙏🙏" TILL THE COWS COME HOME, I JUST CAN'T. WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE DOING.
HIGH SCHOOLERS CAN DRIVE CARS. HIGH SCHOOLERS CAN HAVE FULL TIME JOBS. HIGH SCHOOLERS ARE HAVING SEX WITH EACH OTHER. HIGH SCHOOLERS ARE RAISING ACTUAL REAL LIFE CHILDREN. AND WE'RE CONSIDERING THEM KIDS THEMSELVES BECAUSE... YOU WANT YOUR PRECIOUS SPACES WHERE YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THOSE UNCOMFORTABLE TOPICS AND PEOPLE TRYING TO INTEGRATE THEMSELVES INTO THE WORLD THEY'RE GOING TO BE MERCILESSLY THROWN INTO HEADFIRST VERY SOON? YOU DONT WANT TO HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THESE PEOPLE NOT KNOWING ANYTHING IN YOUR SPACE WHERE YOU KNOW EVERYTHING AND INSTEAD WANT TO PROLONG THEIR OPPRESSION JUST ONE MORE YEAR SO THEY CAN WORRY ABOUT IT ALL THEMSELVES A DIFFERENT TIME?
BUT 19 YEAR OLDS ARE FINE. BECAUSE 18 AND 19 IS SUCH A BIG JUMP, AND THEY MUST HAVE LEARNED MATURITY AND EARNED THEIR PLACE IN "THE REAL WORLD" NOW, RIGHT? JUST LIKE 17 AND 18, AND 16 AND 17, AND SO ON. YOU EARN YOUR RIGHTS WHEN YOU TURN THE AGE YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO HAVE LEARNED AT ALL BEFORE. AND IF YOU DON'T, WE PUSH YOU DOWN MORE, OR WE MOVE ON WITHOUT YOU.
JESUS EVER FUCKING CHRIST. I ALMOST WISH I COULD STILL BE AS BLINDLY IGNORANT AS WE ONCE WERE SO I DIDNT HAVE TO KEEP REALIZING, OVER AND OVER AGAIN, THAT CONSERVATISM IS STILL RAMPANTLY OVERSEEING ALL AND THAT WE STILL NEED TO DO SO MUCH ABOUT IT.