im gonna tell you a secret. one time me and my best friend and her loser coworker went to a rave in santa clara, california. i was the designated driver and my friends loser coworker spent the entire drive talking about a rare tf2 hat he got one time and about how shit my music was (it was gojira and not shit). he also brought shrooms and my bestie tried them with him despite her being near enough to straightedge usually. anyway we kick rocks at the beach (you know the one with the rich people houses overlooking it) then get to the rave. by this time loser coworker is chilling but my bestie is starting to get shroomzoned. a real ego death spiral. i forgot to mention before this but i went in ill fitting slacks and a waffle knit polo and a bright red hat that said "practice safe sex" in white lettering across the front. so basically like a fucking narc. and my bestie and coworker were in a cardigan and a nickelback shirt respectively. like I cannot stress how dogshit we all looked. anyway so we get in and the music starts and it's bad. like, god, it's real bad. coworker is big chillin but my bestie spends the entire rave sitting on a bench experiencing complete ego death while a cute dyke tries desperately to get her to dance. i stand in the back and dance and let a drunk lady spray rose water in my face. during all of this the room is getting absolutely inundated with vape smoke, and water is $5 a bottle cash only eat shit and die. so it's real dire. there was a really nice stoner twink who very clearly wanted me but about 10min before kicking everyone out I started feeling so lightheaded that i legit fled the building and went to get a bunch of water from a gas station. i picked up my charges nearby and we drove home in almost complete silence. i wish i had the smoker lung necessary to last long enough to get that twinks number. i thought you'd want to know.
you’re really awesome i wish my life were this eventful
