I think basically it would be really pleasant to find a bug type pokemon, like, a Wurmple, eating up your garden and say hey excuse me, these plants are really important to me and I would prefer you didn't eat them, do you want to come with me to the garden center and we can pick out something just for you? And you'd offer your hand and it would sniff and go wurm wurm! And crawl up onto your shoulder and you'd look at plants together and then when you go to the checkout a lady says you and your partner Wurmple make quite a cute pair and you start to say oh I don't really know this Wurmple we just met today and then you and the Wurmple look at each other and decide you both had a lot of fun together and that it would love to be your friend.

And then basically just this happens with different puppies and kitties and teacups and stuff like every few days.

when we started talking about getting a small-breed dog I was like, "I will NEVER turn into one of those people who treats their little dog like a doll or an accessory by forcing them to dress up in ridiculous outfits. Dogs HATE that. They should get to be DOGS, and that means not having to wear anything but a HARNESS and being FREE to ROLL in the MUD." and then I adopted a dog who throws a fit if you try to take him for a walk without letting him pick out a bow tie first. a dog who loves wearing pajamas so much that I'm about to spend a disgusting amount of money on several sets of linen ones for summer. a dog who watches me wave at him to follow me through a mud puddle and just stands there blinking up at me like, "are you fucking serious? and get my paws wet?"

me: I will raise him no differently than the two 80-lb labs I had growing up. absolutely no hoity-toity frou frou little yapyap dog stuff. he's gonna be a good ol' fashioned, rough-and-tumble, capital D-O-G—

—never mind. the boy yearns to be ensweatered

while I'm at it we really do need to be nicer to fat trans girls

Especially fat black trans girls.

pet play but its with insects

oh yeah baby youre my sexy little deer fly

Whatever. Cum my scarab.

Actual image of me fighting for my fucking life on discord

Them: WHAT ELSE

Me, crying, broken: the suckers can leave hickies also they taste with their suckers 😭😭😭😭

How August kinda feels to me

im literally in tears what the fuck

If you wanna know the state of Yugioh TCG collecting in the wake of Overframes in the core game…

The situation is so funny man

Basically, Mr grifter announced that he might be getting into the collecting side of yugioh, which would lead to the scalping hell that now plagues the Pokémon and One Piece TCGs

As a joke, MBTYugioh gave them pointers on what to “invest in”, recommending some of the WORST shit products that this game released in the years

He then followed up with a tongue-in-cheek, clearly trolling video recommending shit like Legendary Duelists sets, Duelist of Deep and Synchro Storm, and the Platinum cards, and exclusive COINS before ending the video with “Don’t invest in yugioh. You will lose money due to this game’s reprint policies”

Like, it was very obvious for anyone with half-a-brain cell and is familiar with Yugioh that the video is a joke

BUT a bunch of scalping bots took the video at face value and bought out these doodoo, worthless products immediately after his fuckass video came out

Now they’re sitting on unsellable trash. 100% deserved, I hope everyone whose trying to grift this game like Pokémon loses their money

Yu-Gi-Oh fans really saw the scalpers coming and said "You've activated my trap card".

Having a really long-term hyperfixation that has since faded is terrifying yes but it's also so embarrassing. Hi I used to think about Scrimblo Splungus 25/7. Yeah, for 2 years straight. Nah, I don't think about them anymore except for with a vague sense of melancholy as I recall how they used to make me feel. Anyways this new one, Blimpkins McGee? I'm gonna think about them forever and the cycle will NOT repeat in 2 years. Trust me guys.

(To the tune of Rasputin): BLEH BLEH DRACULA, KING OF TRANSYLVANIA, HE IS A BAT AND ALSO A MAN

I Saw The TV Show

That’s his emotional support bug

ishmael birthday doodles posted by the official account.. :]

potentially controversial but i don't think "male sexuality is inherently predatory (and so if you don't want to be predatory, you're probably a girl)" is a winning feminist take. i actually think it's exactly the opposite and we should really be avoiding the implication that predatory misogynistic behavior is biological and not social in nature

every time someone reduces outis to “dante glazer” or implies that she’s flattering dante because she wants them (usually in conjunction with misgendering them) i kill another innocent index proselyte