Another addition to the Shane Hollander list of "do it scared, but DO IT" badassery is him standing in front of his parents less than 48 hours after Ilya and him have exchanged declarations of love and being like:
Yuna: "But you hate him"
Shane: "No, I get that, but no. I love him."
LIKEEE the way he just SAYS it. There are other things he could have said. "We're together" or "We're involved" but he goes for absolute clarity. I love him. (It's not up for discussion) Can we just sit down, please?
i’m in full on tears over this
A million people have already said this but the thing about "gremlin" as a fandom nickname for Armand is that it was affectionate, and was also heavily offset by the fact that all of the characters within the books are calling him a sweetie baby angel even while he is being actively evil.
And it was funny when they referenced it in the show. "Is it the gremlin or the good nurse tonight?" literally encapsulates Armand's character to a T while also being a fun little nod to the fandom nickname. But now the show has reduced him down to only that, and there's none of the swooning and woobifying of him by the rest of the characters to offset it.
Even if Armand was being played by a white actor it would still be a complete reduction and misrepresentation of his character and of the way his character is perceived by others, but when you add on the fact that this treatment is only being given to him when he's being portrayed by a brown man it adds a whole new layer to it.
he wouldn't admit it to shane until they'd been married like three years, but the first time they fucked was the best night of ilya's life. maybe excluding their wedding, or winning the Cup with shane. maybe. he felt like an actual god that night. didn't even matter that boston lost – he finally got to fuck shane hollander after literal years of chasing him. he could never stop thinking about:
- how hollander curled all around him and pulled his hair just a little while they were kissing and it made his entire body tingle like nobody else had ever done or would ever do.
- how he got hollander to make those insane breathless whimpery noises when he ate him out, all shocked and trying not to and then giving into it.
- that hollander really, really liked getting fucked. in the back of his mind ilya had worried that maybe hollander was like him and the idea of being fucked was better than the reality, or maybe it would only feel okay. but no, hollander absolutely melted even when ilya was just fingering him and it was a revelation for both of them. it was so easy to make him feel good.
- that hollander REALLY liked getting fucked. the way he pushed back for more and pressed his face into the pillows and moaned loud and shaky and clenched his fingers in the sheets and actually – actually! – came without either of them even touching him, that was the cherry on top of the most perfect cake. ilya did that to him. ilya did that for him.
and it wasn't just that ilya made him feel good, although obviously ilya was a guy who got off on making his partners feel amazing. it was that it was hollander: uptight, always annoyed at him, his perfectly perfect rival who was so strong and dominating and fun to play against on the ice and so desperate to submit to him in the bedroom. absolutely fucking perfect for ilya. he would look at hollander's stern, serious face on television or across from him during a faceoff and think nobody else knows what you like. nobody else knows how you get shy and overwhelmed and want to be told what to do so badly. i'm the only one who knows what you look like when you're being fucked so well and you can't get enough of it, it feels so good. and you can only get that from me.
for a while afterward he only felt – he thought he only felt – triumph. the desire to submit to someone he didn't even like, the fact that ilya fucked him until he was begging and whining and he loved it, had to be more than a little humiliating for hollander. but the more he thought about it, which was all the time, the more he remembered how unbearably sweet and soft hollander had been, how good it felt, how much he wanted to take care of hollander afterward. how he had wanted to stay and kiss him to sleep and listen to him make those happy little buzzing hums ilya only heard him make right after he came.
nothing else ever really touched that feeling, not even winning the Cup that year. when he thought about the 2013-2014 season he thought about that night with hollander first and then the Cup. terrifying. he could never, ever tell anyone.
(until one night several years married when shane abruptly says "do you ever think about our first time together?" and ilya says "no, hollander, i have forgotten. when was that?" and instead of throwing a pillow at him shane looks troubled and says "yeah, i guess it probably didn't mean as much to you as it did to me," and ilya has to correct him so shane knows exactly, exactly where it ranks in ilya's personal list of best days ever.)
One of the rookies on the Centaurs asking the guys on the team for advice on this girl he's been trying to date. He can't tell if she likes him and is just nervous about taking it to the next level, or if she's trying to let him down easy and he hasn't been able to pick up on it.
He doesn't get much useful advice and soon the guys are arguing about how long you can pursue someone before it starts getting pathetic. Holmberg is at one end of the spectrum at two weeks ("We're rich professional athletes, man, we shouldn't have to try that hard.") and Wyatt Hayes is on the other at three months ("Maybe she likes you but just doesn't want the WAG lifestyle. You need to prove to her that you see her as a person with her own goals separate from yours.")
Then someone notices that Ilya, despite his wealth of experience, hasn't chimed in yet and asks, "What do you think, Cap?"
"Two years."
The entire room goes still.
"What?"
"Two years," Ilya repeats, completely unashamed. "Is not pathetic to go for what you want. Not if you think they're worth it."
In sync, every person in the room turns to look at Shane, who's pretending to fiddle with the laces on his skates, looking pink-faced and vaguely pleased.
Finally, Holmberg turns to the rookie. "Okay, I guess two years is fine if it's Shane Hollander. Is your girl Shane Hollander?"
The poor rookie has no response to that. His girl is, indeed, not literally Shane Hollander.
"Man, gay people move different," LaPointe mutters.
"This is not a gay thing," Troy objects. "This is a Rozanov and Hollander thing."
Troy being like - I locked down Harris in a matter of months. We are NOT the same.
Ilya responding - you didn't have to convince him he was gay first.
straight white people making a romance movie: haha what if it was illegal to have sex? wait what's lawrence v texas. wait what's mclaughlin v florida. wait what's loving v virginia
imagine being one of daniel molloy’s daughters and finding out the deadbeat asshole you hate bagged the hottest guy you have ever seen in your life. and on top of that, the gorgeous man is rich, which means he’s not going after that old man’s book money. you can’t even make fun of your dickhead dad for being a fool falling for a sugar baby scheme. worst of all that gorgeous interesting rich guy seems to genuinely be deeply in love with your horrible dad and you have never seen your fuckass dad look happier. i would be so fucking mad. no amount of therapy would cure the bitterness in my heart. the old bastard doesn’t deserve all that, is just not fair, what the fuck man
I support the "fiction isn't real so nothing matters" mindset but tbf at a certain point it can tip over into "the curtains are just blue" territory
like yes actually there is a conversation to be had about how a characters actions are framed and how they thematically fit with the rest of the story and it can in fact reflect the author's beliefs. some authors are even trying to make a point
not all depiction is glorification but sometimes it is and you need to be able to tell the difference. not because your immortal soul will be tainted by reading The Bad One, but because you need to have reading comprehension skills
peer reviewed