The starting over

its the most beautiful day I've seen since this who disater started, and even though I'm sitting here quite hungry and weak, I feel like i've accomplished a lot today. the house is clean, my boys are happy, and baby is on his way...

- going through a divorce
- weight getting lower and lower
- going to the gym tonight
- eating more raw than not
- met the male version of me, except he is 90% muscle
- having lots of fun
- we work together
- sorry for such a crappy update
- love you, be back soon!

anyone else excited for Alice in wonderland?? I AM!

thanks you all who commented on my last post, I was feeling really horrible and alone, as per usual these days. I work so much that I haven't be able to post, and I really really miss it. my weight is starting to go down. 134 this morning. I'm trying to find some kind of balance between not eating too much or too little, but It is very hard for me right now. the good produce is becoming spars, but hopefully as it gets warmer, floods of my favorite foods will fill the markets soon. I'm struggling to quit smoking again, but I know if I really tried I could do without, I guess I just don't care enough yet. I haven't seen my friends in months, and have piles of books that I feel determined to get through even if that means that I loose sleep. I already have to end this post and get back to the children. miss reading your posts, love you.

I haven't weighed myself in weeks, and haven't been eating very well. I got into a car accident a few days ago and have been eating junk not even realizing with all the pain meds. Today I woke feeling really slugish and decided to weigh myself. Even though I always doubt my scale no matter what it reads I'm losing my mind after seeing 138.4. I've already changed the food in the cubbords, but that isn't going to change my weight too much because I cannot exercise anyway. Bright side is I'm off work, so lots of time for reading. Still sad though.

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xo

finally finished Eclipse last night at midnight, way past my bedtime, but it was worth it. Started reading Breaking Dawn, but I passed out on the first page. I finally received the call last night that I was waiting for all day, and didn't make it to the phone in time, they left a message, which I could barely hear. I apparently got the job, but the only thing he said was that there were a few more things he wanted to go over with and to call him on Wednesday? I have some really important bank business to take care of today, a few appointments to make, and then my main focus will be sleeping until I start my job, whenever that may be.

if anyone here has read ECLIPSE, I am at the part where Bella and Jacob share that passionate kiss during the war. I'm freaking out at how turned on these books have made me, and totally pissed that right in the middle of this kiss my Itouch dies. mother fucker.

Saw lovely bones this weekend, and I loved it, it really did justice to the book. just did a some commenting, but I have to get back to reading Eclipse hopefully I can fall back to sleep, or get a good nap in later. I'm really surprised and happy at how good I feel after only a few days with no pot cigarettes or cooked food. I knew if I was patient that I would see results fast, but I forgot how fast and drastic the changes are. I wonder how much of a difference the skin brushing makes, either way I'm addicted to the feeling so its already become a part of my daily grooming. feeling like a bit of a shut in lately but I'm not really bothered about as much as I feel guilty for not spending time with my friends. honestly I need this time to kind of recoup from last year. I already started this one off pretty bad, not as bad as last year but bad enough. enough about thinking about the past, I'm so very much ready to just keep moving on. have a great day ladies.

wow I have so much commenting to do when I get back...