Hermann

A little of both really. Newt is a bit of an outcast in that social world, so we have that in common, but Newt does sometimes get carried away with his own generosity and forgets how things can look, when you don’t have so many millions. The hardest part has been feeling that I’m still being of use, in Newton’s company, and not simply a piece of- arm candy, as you say. I value my talents, and it feels wrong to be in a position where I don’t have to use them/

Newt

Hermann… well, yeah he has, but not because he’s not rich. I wasn’t always this rich anyway, so I remember. But Hermann’s done so much, particularly with, y’know, bedroom stuff; it’s no big deal with him, or with his friends and that- I’ve never had that before. Like it was normal or just- no big deal. Sometimes it’s hard to get out of my own head, and Hermann comes in and is sarcastic at me until I snap out of it. I don’t know how I ever managed without him.

After the wedding night, yes. Knowing I can’t be gotten rid of, and can trust on staying does make things a lot more secure. It would have been a lot harder without Newt, but he has been- so sweet, so very supportive. I keep waiting for him to say he’s had enough of me, and leave me but… I think by this point, he won’t.

Hermann: It feels like my life has had three parts. Before Newt disappeared, when he was gone, and now. I sometimes forget which one I’m in, and the change is- difficult. The relief that Newt is alive is almost painful, and the reminder that he has been through… all this pain, is…

It’s hard to cope.

Newt: I get angry. I mean, it was okay when I was still there. Being angry kept me alive, kept me thinking and not just- giving up. But it’s like I can’t stop being angry now. I wish I could hit the gym or go running or something but I’m still too wrecked. I just get short-tempted and pissed off and it’s hard not to taking it out on Hermann- and that would be awful.

Hermann: You never told me.

Newt: Dude, you have way too much to worry about already.

Hermann: Have you spoken to your therapist-

Newt: Yeah, she’s gonna try and get me cleared for swimming physical therapy. I need to channel it out and it’ll get better.

Um… honestly? He’s hot. Just reallly, really really hot. I’m a moron who gets really turned on by sexy confident assholes. I mean, that’s why I decided to even try this… arguing ideological enemies with benefits thing?

But he’s very cool too, and smart and brilliant and funny and… he does care, though you really have to know him to realise that’s what it is. It’s not easy, definitely and… I admit I’ve done as much to make it hard as Hermann has.

But things are getting better, we are… closer. I want to see where this goes, okay?

It hasn’t been the easiest. Strangely, the dragons have been the easiest part. I have always been terrified of dragons, so being in a kingdom where I never have to fight one is a relief. They are a lot less frightening when following courtly ettiquete.

And Newt… I wish I could have met him in a different situation. He is friendly and kind and- all I can think of is that I have to sleep with him. I can’t relax or rest with that. If not, if we had more time- I would like us to be friends.

Runaway Princess Yarila: Hermine always seemed rather strange. She is utterly helpless at some things, yet… I would never have escaped with my eggs without her. She barely knows how to do anything by herself, but she never complained, always tried. She bore her share of our burdens and… I am glad she is with us. I am glad to have her as man-sister.

Dragon of the South Yarila: I worried at first. We had escaped the South, only to find a Southern ruler in what was to be our refuge. I thought Hermann was a fellow refugee at first, someone who had been hurt like we had, and when we found the truth… it was a relief. He understood, and like us- he was alone. I am glad to help. 

I am also rather glad Brelin is growing up with excellent prospects for the future.

Hermann: No. In fact, it was the very opposite. Those I thought might be friends, who might care- it just became clearer that they did not. 

I thought the young boy who begged I was allowed to live might have cared but… no. He just wanted a pet, and the moment I made it clear I was not.. some kind of dog, he no longer cared what happened to me. He was not a friend, he was a spoiled child who wanted a pet no one else had.

Those who wanted me to be beaten less- they still thought of me as an animal, a… thing. And when I showed myself to be more than that… they were usually happy to see me beaten.

I am glad they told me I was to be sent to the North so early on. It would have been… hard to bear otherwise.

Chris: Alison.

Tendo: Alison.

Alison: Alison.

Chris: She has the ideas. We try and be the ones with the common sense.

Alison: Unless we’re talking about people making snap judgements and wrecking perfectly nice dates.

Chris: *sigh* You’ll never let me forget that, will you?

Alison: Never.