Tags: life

harry potter - ron ron ron weasley

Writer's Block: Coast Range

If you had to choose, would you rather live in the mountains or by the ocean?

I grew up by the ocean. Grand Bank is a fishing village. The Atlantic surrounds it from one end to the other, on several beaches and in the harbour mouth. When I was six we moved to a house that was right next to one of those beaches. When there were storms, or when it was really windy, you could hear the water sloshing and crashing and rolling, and eventually the sounds became incredibly comforting. When we moved again, when I was 12, I really missed the sounds. The wind would come right off the water and the entire cul-de-sac would hear their windows rattle and feel their houses shake. You could go down on the rocks in your rubbers watch the whitecaps roll, making the buoys dance. The sky was always the most beautiful colours in the springtime, red, grey, purple, orange... it seemed even more amazing on calm days when the horizon blended between the water and the skyline and you couldn't tell where either started or began. You'd see the fishing boats heading out in the morning, see the seagulls circling and diving, and best of all, you'd smell the salt water. God do I ever miss that wonderful smell.

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The first time I left Newfoundland (that I can remember), I went to Ontario, where the air smells like feet because of all the pollution. Ottawa wasn't so bad--Toronto is most definitely the worst. Paris smelled like... sweet. The French countryside was intoxicating, and at the time it was raining, which made the scent and taste even more delicious. It had nothing on saltwater, though. Every time I get off of a plane in St. John's, as soon as I'm outside, I just take a deep breath and drink it in.

There's a lake here in Kelowna, but it just smells like wet dog. There are lakes much prettier than the Okanagan around the area, but none of them are the ocean. It's much easier to breathe in than Ontario ever was, though, and on every side of the city there are the Okanagan mountains; these magnificent, towering things, enclose Kelowna in it's little valley and almost... watch over us. The feel like a security blanket. I didn't notice the first time I left, when Robyn and I went to Seattle, Vancouver and Victoria, but when we went again in September for the Hanson shows, it kind of hit me how strange it was not to be surrounded on all sides. I felt weirdly exposed. I guess I've really adjusted to the feeling of the city.

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I dipped my fingers in the Pacific ocean when we went to Victoria. It's a beautiful city. Someday I'd really like to live there, even if it's only for a little while. Vancouver Island is very similar to Newfoundland in terms of weather (as it's often raining), except it's warm and comfortable instead of cold and stupid. There were harbours and beaches and seagulls there too, and fishing boats. We never got to see the waves roll, but I still couldn't help but look out there, with the fog settled around the surface of the water, and remember how much I'd enjoyed growing up where I did. The only thing missing was that smell, the one that tells stories of my mother's youth, when Grand Bank was a prosperous place, when the fishplant bell told you it was time to go home for dinner, of my grandfather's time as a fisherman, of my grandmother and great-grandmother spreading and salting fish on the beaches, of my great-grandfather--a fishing boat captain--who built what's now my grandfather's home for his wife because she wanted something with that 'Victorian' style, and for always being told that Grand Bank was a cornerstone in Newfoundland's history. Which it is.

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I guess the truth of all this is (or the answer to the question, anyway) that the ocean means so much to me, I'd love to be near it again, even if it's only for a short amount of time. I haven't been home in two years. In the meantime, however, I do have the mountains, and I love them, I really do. They are not some second-rate eye candy. I know that if I do leave Kelowna, I'll really miss them.

I think that what the ocean and the mountains have in common, for me, is how beautiful they are to be around, and how nice it is to be somewhere where you can look out your windows and see a real 'force' of nature.

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heroes - that's gross claire

I love the whole world, it's such a brilliant place

... I do not like the change in my userinfo. It is strange and unwelcome, livejournal. Speaking of strange and unwelcome, I logged onto Facebook this morning to find that it had broken Tyler and I up; we were both no longer listed as 'in a relationship', which was... very weird. I didn't know it could random alter your information, unless someone got into mine or Tyler's profile, but that seems unlikely, given... why alter our relationship status, of all things? Very odd, that.

I am tired. I have been working much and sleeping not enough. Tomorrow, however, is my last day at Tim Horton's. I'm going to miss aspects of it, of course--mainly the people I work with. I have some excellent co-workers. But I am very happy for the change I will be experiencing, and I like the atmosphere of Chevron... I feel like Wally really goes out of his way to make sure that his employees are happy and that they know what they're doing and what's expected of them. I think that's important, you know? If you're working for someone, you shouldn't have to guess and suppose your limitations and permissables.

We'll see, of course. Give me a few weeks and I could be in complete hate with this job and regretting ever taking it. I have my doubts, but you never know with my brain. It's a weird and unpredictable thing, and it likes to make shit up as it goes along.
the office - damn dementors

1800 square feet

My cellphone started working again! HOORAY! Now I don't have to buy a new one that I really REALLY can't afford!

I handed in my resignation and it went quite well. Kristy completely understood about my knees and didn't make a fuss, just changed the schedule so that after this weeked I work until the 7th and that's it, I am a done duck. I start full-time at Chevron (which is a gas station for those who don't know) on the 11th, the Tuesday, so I get some of the long weekend with Tyler and some time to enjoy mine and Robyn's new apartment. I'm starting some basic training at Chevron tomorrow so that once I go into fulltime I'm familiar with the til and etc. :) Plus it's a little extra money for the two weeks I'm still at Tim's, which is a nice bonus for any number of reasons.

I've got a good portion of the kitchen packed up. I left the basics for Robyn and I to use in the meantime, but packed up most all of the dishes, glasses and mugs. I've also got our movies and CDs packed up. Robyn's mom and grandmother are coming over to help her tomorrow and Wednesday (her days off), so we should be pretty well set to go, 100%, by Friday. Here's hoping. Moving is such a stupid headache of a thing.
juno - whoa!  dream big!

5th floor against the back wall

Here's the thing about potential new jobs: Potential pay cuts.

I was under the impression that the pay rate was the same, for multiple reasons. Turns out there's a big "NO" on that front. I would drop down 75cents from what I'm currently making OR, providing I finish the training that would see me promoted to a full-blown 'Supervisor', it would be a $1.25 loss in pay.

That would probably be a bad move, wouldn't it, given the crapshoot my finances are stuck in at the moment?

Here's the weighing in, as well. Would I be any happier in a similar job, for less money? Would I really learn or accomplish anything more? Should I sacrifice the flexibility and seniority I currently have, when I know it's something to rely on, when I have medical and dental benefits, and when I might be going to school in January?

And I don't hate Tim Horton's. (Hate is a pretty strong word, anyway.) I mean, well, I do get very frustrated with it, but I don't hate it. Usually it's during the antagonizing periods, when something happens that throws my schedule out of wack or something equally annoying... that's when I want to throw in the towel and quit. It's like... when the evening shifts get frustratingly monotonous. It's when I live in Black Mountain and have to leave my house THREE HOURS before my shift starts in order to get to work on time, because the buses are RIDICULOUSLY infrequent.

That last problem should be rectified on November 1st, at least, when Robyn and I are living in town. Other things, well... they're in and out. And I'm almost always bouncing back and forth between whether I'm willing to stay or whether I'm desperate to get out.

I haven't been made a job offer at the other place, regardless. But if they do call, I think I may have to turn it down. My rent will be going up. I may be going back to school. I can't afford to take a slice to my paycheck. Especially not when they only do pay raises every six months, based on performance. In the last nine months I've gone from $9 to $11, and by the time I hit one year there, I'll be at $12. It's just... stability versus something new? I don't know.
harry potter - the truth about DH

timeless and infectious

I hate apartment hunting, seriously. Every place I call, I get an answering machine, and 3/4 of the listings I'm combing through don't allow pets. Not even small pets with a deposit. I am getting very, very frustrated. It should not be this hard to find a two-bedroom place in Kelowna that allows small animals, availabe for November 1st. And if people could either call me back or BE AT HOME WHEN I CALL that would be AWESOME and a very nice change of pace.

Also, I hate having my days off in the middle of the week. This is absolutely ridiculous. I'm sure that Kristy could've arranged this better, so that I could have at least had Wednesday and Thursday instead of Tuesday and Wednesday. What on God's green Earth can I do with myself on Tuesday and Wednesday? I went to OC today and paid my application processing fee, zomg, and then mailed off my transcript request for Ryerson (equally exciting, as you can well imagine). I ate A&W, went to the bank, VOTED (did the rest of legal Canada, I wonder?), bought some chips, and then came home. That was at 4. Since then I have been sitting here amongst the newspaper that's strewn everywhere, with the computer open, alternating between househunting and reading Vanity Fair. And you know why? Because all of my friends are either working or going to school on the weekdays. I am spending the evening with my cats, and Uncle Bob, who is happy with me today because I gave him some macaroni and some toast with apricot jam on it.

It is crap. BUT. Tomorrow I have a job interview! It is my call-back interview for this place; it may or may not be my escape from Tim Horton's to an equally if not more challenging job that pays just as much (if not more), sees me working mornings and early afternoons, and offers me better benefits. I am crossing my fingers and fairly determined to impress their bums right off, because I am in dire need of a positive change. We'll see tomorrow, I suppose.

With any luck Tyler will call soon and save me from myself and this relocating mess; It's just going to be such an overwhelming pain in the ass from start to finish, once we find a place, put down a damage deposit, pay the first month's rent, pack up all of our shit, and go. I need to master telekenisis so I can just transport things with my mind. Curse my lack of genetic evolution.
the office - damn dementors

sad

My cats destroyed pieces of styrofoam and littered it all over the living room. It distresses me greatly, but it is really hard to be mad at Finn because it's his birthday tomorrow and he's going to be one and that makes me really sad. He's my little baby kitty and now he's a cat. He's still insane, and will be frolicking in kittenhood for quite a bit longer since Georgie's still got a ways to go before she's an adult, but still. He's a big boy now, but he's still my sucky little orange Finnigan.

I'm such a mush.
the office - damn dementors

oooOOooo

Holy CRAP it's MARCH.

Wtf.

Where is the time going, seriously? In two weeks I'll have been in Kelowna for THREE MONTHS. It feels like madness. Because it IS madness. The passing of time is a weird phenomenon. Sometimes it's fast, sometimes it's slow, but no matter what speed it goes at you wake up one morning and realize that you've been alive for these many years and these many months and these many days... and if you're like me you struggle to figure out just WHAT the HELL you're doing with your life.

Which at the moment appears to be:

- Working at Tim Horton's full-time
- Sleeping
- Eating
- Getting paid and dividing up said money practically (rent, bills, bus fare, food, etc)
- Going out occasionally, doing things
- Reading books
- Writing
- Anticipating summer
- Cooking (when there's food)
- Wasting hours online
- Procrastinating cleaning

... And that sums it up fairly well. I feel like somewhere in among it all I should be doing something monumental. But such a situation has yet to materialize.

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the office - damn dementors

if you say so

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So when I feel like taking a long right through Kelowna, I take the 8, which goes into the Mission (I think) and out to Okanagan College, then back to the mall, then up Enterprise Way (which is the street I work on). It kills about 40 minutes, gets me to TH's on time, and usually, shortly after lunch, is not that full. Well the other day about 3/4 of the 14 year old population of Kelowna got on the bus and took the damn thing over. QUESTION! I know I was loud and indifferent when I was 14, but was I the only person my age who wasn't rude as shit?

This one chick, she's flat as a board and looks like she wants to eat everyone's soul, she makes a loud comment about how one of her girlfriend's is fishing in her non-existent cleavage, and then DROPS her DAMN BOOKBAG right on my FEET. And looks at me like, "Whatcha gonna do, BITCH?" In an awesome show of maturity, I kicked it across the bus.

And I think teenagers text more than they have actual conversations, nowadays. I swear that their cellphones are just an extention of their hands. Like go-go-gadget Samsung! ... Or something.

/Random
the office - damn dementors

INVISIBLE SANDWICH

Portfolio is down to short story excerpt, novel excerpt and two poems. It amazing how quickly you can hit 15 pages. I also figured out how to get my high school transcripts sent off. Now I have to get Rob to review my submission, get a letter of intent typed up, and then borrow Rob's parents' printer for a short period of time to sort it out. My online application is excellent and just needs to be paid for.

Not bad, not bad.

I made really yummy meat sauce and pasta today. I wanted spaghetti but we only had enough noodles left for one person. Lame. Still tasted really good, however. I want to make some scallopped potatoes, but we don't have enough potatoes at the moment. Maybe ham? Seems feasible for one day next week. I also want to cook a chicken, but I want to do it for multiple people so it won't just end up sitting around in our fridge and forgotten about. Chicken, mashed potatoes, peas, carrots, gravy... the whole nine yards. And a dessert. Fruit flan, I feel like. I've never made one of those before.

Looks like we're going to be getting cable on Wednesday. And a landline, and our own internetz instead of bumming off the landlords.

... I'm hungry.
the office - damn dementors

that's the night that the lights went out in Georgia

I don't like AdSpace. My stupid paid account expired and there are little digital people stalking me wherever I am. And I'm down to 15 icons. LAMEPANTS.

My thumb is throbbing like a mofo. And it looks GROSS. I took the banadage off today, as instructed, and it's all while and bloody and like. Pulsing. Isn't that a sweet image? Throw in the stitches a some purple discolouration, and my Hot or Not rating is like, through the roof. (If we were standing on the roof.)

I fell asleep on the bus today. I woke up downtown and was all WTF and ended up late for work, go me, as I had to take the other 10 in the opposite direction and then like, sprint across the highway. Getting hit by a car, now THAT would've been a real cap on the last week. Ha.

I'm grim and melodramatic tonight, apparently.