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stackcatsI’m really confused by a lot of weight loss culture and also by aspects of fat acceptance. I’m trying to lose weight and I know I’m doing the right thing for me, but yesterday I saw an instagram post where a fat positive plus size fashion blogger stated that “before and after” weight loss photos are "toxic and an aspect of weight loss culture".
It made me question everything. I’ve been following r/progresspics and commenting on lots of people’s success stories because they’ve worked so hard and achieved so much, and the “after” photos feature more genuine smiling faces than the “befores”. I even posted my own first progress pic when I realised my face no longer looks bloated and tired (I’ve lost 11 kg so far).
I thought I was pro-fat acceptance, and I am indeed so. How much adipose tissue you possess, and how much space you occupy, and indeed any aspect of your appearance, is no indication of your personality, values, qualities, ethics, or anything else. If someone is happy with the way they are, that's no one else's concern.
But to call weight loss celebration/encouragement communities "toxic" by default seems... well, a little toxic to me. I can understand where this comes from, because there is a LOT of fat-shaming in the world, every other women's magazing contains slimming tips, slimming aids are promoted constantly, I know because I've dealt with it myself. I have been fat-shamed to my face, I have been judged unworthy because I'm not sleek and gorgeous, and I have a lot of self-loathing and anxiety because of that. However, none of that actually means that losing weight is a bad thing.
I want to lose weight because I want to be able to do things like sit comfrotably in an aeroplane seat, walk around a new city for hours, run up stairs, take my dog out for longer runs, fit in more styles of clothing, feel less hot in summer, not wear out shoes so quickly... lots of things that are more difficult when you're lugging around an extra 50kg you don't need. And to achieve that I'm going to have to put in a lot of hard work. I've been going to the gym (cardio & weight machines) and counting calories and fighting food cravings, and I've ached physically and mentally for these first 11kg. The next 40 or so are gonna be even tougher, especially since I'm adding muscle. I'm fighting to stay motivated, to get to the gym with unfavourable work shifts and study recommencing, to resist all the new vegan junk food that's coming out these days. It is, pure and simple, putting in the work to achieve a desired result. A result that affects nobody but myself. Just as staying overweight would affect nobody but myself.
Can we try and move towards a culture where we can accept other people's choices about how they physically present themselves, and what they value in their lives, to the extent that it doesn't affect others? People who value fitness and slimness should be happy to have that for themselves and accept that not everyone desires it, and people who are larger can love themselves and their lives without judging others for wanting something different.
It made me question everything. I’ve been following r/progresspics and commenting on lots of people’s success stories because they’ve worked so hard and achieved so much, and the “after” photos feature more genuine smiling faces than the “befores”. I even posted my own first progress pic when I realised my face no longer looks bloated and tired (I’ve lost 11 kg so far).
I thought I was pro-fat acceptance, and I am indeed so. How much adipose tissue you possess, and how much space you occupy, and indeed any aspect of your appearance, is no indication of your personality, values, qualities, ethics, or anything else. If someone is happy with the way they are, that's no one else's concern.
But to call weight loss celebration/encouragement communities "toxic" by default seems... well, a little toxic to me. I can understand where this comes from, because there is a LOT of fat-shaming in the world, every other women's magazing contains slimming tips, slimming aids are promoted constantly, I know because I've dealt with it myself. I have been fat-shamed to my face, I have been judged unworthy because I'm not sleek and gorgeous, and I have a lot of self-loathing and anxiety because of that. However, none of that actually means that losing weight is a bad thing.
I want to lose weight because I want to be able to do things like sit comfrotably in an aeroplane seat, walk around a new city for hours, run up stairs, take my dog out for longer runs, fit in more styles of clothing, feel less hot in summer, not wear out shoes so quickly... lots of things that are more difficult when you're lugging around an extra 50kg you don't need. And to achieve that I'm going to have to put in a lot of hard work. I've been going to the gym (cardio & weight machines) and counting calories and fighting food cravings, and I've ached physically and mentally for these first 11kg. The next 40 or so are gonna be even tougher, especially since I'm adding muscle. I'm fighting to stay motivated, to get to the gym with unfavourable work shifts and study recommencing, to resist all the new vegan junk food that's coming out these days. It is, pure and simple, putting in the work to achieve a desired result. A result that affects nobody but myself. Just as staying overweight would affect nobody but myself.
Can we try and move towards a culture where we can accept other people's choices about how they physically present themselves, and what they value in their lives, to the extent that it doesn't affect others? People who value fitness and slimness should be happy to have that for themselves and accept that not everyone desires it, and people who are larger can love themselves and their lives without judging others for wanting something different.
