i want you to notice...at the same time i dont

i cry myself to sleep
almost every night,
its not because im scared
or overheard another fight.
i want you to notice
that there's something wrong with me,
that im truely not as happy
as i pretend to be.
i want someone's attention
i want somebody's love,
God where is my angel
sent from up above?
she's sitting in her room
draining her own pain,
she doesn't need my problems
added to her brain.
im screaming inside
but nobody's listening,
so now on my cheeks
its tears that are glistening.
don't you understand
that im not just "trying",
this is how i really feel
this is why im dying.
im so fucking alone
always by myself,
much like a kids old toy
that just sits up on the shelf.
all i do is sit here
with noone by myself,
but i guess if noone's around
then i dont have to hide.
-me