Mos
Most spiritual cultures point to the world being an illusion. A dream.
Which parts.
Every evening, I try to figure pinpoint the moments I was not with myself. The moments the emotions took over. When I was lost in a waking dream. Bypassing my precious present moments.
I keep finding myself getting lost in things. Substances often helps with getting lost. They fragment the steady stream of consciousness. You look out the car window after being lost in the sound of the song.
You look out. immediately jump into another get lost in the lights and shapes that are not there. You notice they are not there but you go along with the stream of images.
The soul loves to get lost in experience. some like that experience as drama. some, emotional outbursts, romantic entanglements, etc.
A water sign dealing with the world plays very different from any other signs. If you know signs you will know.
My mother was a water sign. she taught me well. Two of my sisters are water signs. Only one niece of many. I have noticed they female Piscean works with the world differently. nuanced. Unlike the “barbaric” showboating male tends to do. Amazing to the world but a subordinate to the female because they employ the same tactics but with soother results.
𝔴𝔥𝔞𝔱 𝔞 𝔳𝔦𝔢𝔴
When will my experiencer stop. I realized a while back. Never.
Highs and low, no matter to the experiencer. It wants it all. It must be fed. All sacrificed to the God of experience.
It has tricked me into believing I want experiences.
I met it suck at a Vegas airport for 9 hours. We have been playing a cat and mouse game ever since….
I wonder how long it would take me to no longer register this view as spectacular. Are we built to get bored of things? Some suggest there is a way out of the boredom loop. Make sure to find someone who is also out of the boredom loop. Otherwise, All the grand gestures of love will end as soon a the boredom loop activates.
The solar eclipse itself is special and beautiful, but don't you ever forget to look for the shadows. When you stand underneath trees where the light filters through the leaves during a solar eclipse, the shadows become pieces of art, little crescent moons everywhere, creating their very own magic.
I was in a resort on the coast of Izmir when I realized the mental loops.
Repetitive actions on a loop. I caught multiple loops when I looked inside.
The dark energies wants you in lull. Dreaming while awake. In most dreams we are just witnessing what is happening. The only action we can take is to wake up.
If you sit with yourself long in enough, you begin to recognize the different voices. Some come from the body, some from the emotions, others fears / desires.
I haven’t figured out how to transcend loops. Knowing I have them is a good start…
What a moment it must be. To be free of the me, mine, I. I call it mmi.
If that moment is gifted to me, then, I can finally be there. All of me in attention to the other. No longer preoccupied by my mmi.
I am sure people would feel uncomfortable when they do not see any kind of manipulation coming from me. Until they realize I come in peace. imagine that…
This statement is the greatest wish one can give to fellow traveler. We all try to escape from our pains. The world is filled with humans escaping their pain.
The traveler uses self realization the end the pain.
Its a painful journey back to the self. We travelers, all have our battle scars to show for our work.
“it is a reality to be accepted”… I grew up not being prepared to accept what my future moments would bring. Everyone around me had shell shock. PDSD. I learned from them how to “solve” problems.
I try to share with friends and family, life has no problems. We only unacceptance of our moments.
The world taught me how to “solve Problems”. I learned to cheat, manipulate, intimidate, cajole, serenade…
That behavior hurt my soul.
Surrendering to what is.
Mary Oliver, from “Porcupine” in Devotions: Selected Poem.
They say to realize you do not know is the beginning of wisdom. Hope on the other hand is Divine gift. Never lose hope….
