hair

epitaph

This is for the girl with a lifetimes pain behind a timeless mask.
This is for the girl who screamed with every subtle cut and twist as her bloodied raw fingers plucked another shard from her heart.
This is for the tears welling up like like pools of rain flooding up through the green-hued moss-rainbow on the rainforest floor.

This is not a crush,
this is not a love poem,
this is just my words as I listen to your poetry,
listen to your music and
plagiarize your emotions.

I suppose this is some kind of tribute some kind of empathy some kind of... understanding.
This is for the selfishness that hides behind bottled up fears and emotional dysregulation,
As you weave your words like paintings masked in dust from centuries of raw wit and dirt I feel the rhythm beating in a heart that has moved on beyond the constellations and supernova's of its past. Of *course* it has; the present is always the past, life's greatest gift of eternal torment. The wounds that never heal but somehow cease to matter as the heart pumps stronger or the skin masks the gaping chasm with a fibrous armor like so many patches on the hull of a canoe struggling to stay above water.

I feel your courage, your strength like the fractured exoskeleton of a crushed insect that crunches between your fingers long after the life is stilled within it's shell. The sharp edges resisting, battling on in the afterlife, digging in and entrenching themselves in the flesh of your fingers for a second before giving way. On some microscopic scale this is the tympani in a flute-driven overture. As slowly and steadily as destruction happens hope begins to spring anew.

It's been a while.
hair

Innocence Shattered

False hopes and imperceptions
Leading friendship to fall
Broken windows tell the tale

Your friendship was real to me
Binary love defined
Innocence shattered in so few words

You were someone you're not
A sin I couldn't help
Still I pay the price of false love

Battered and bruised the ego falls
while the id cowers scorned
Goodbye my friend, my illusion.
hair

hate

so i only write in here when I'm not happy and I have nobody to talk to.
i've noticed that.
BLAH i hate you livejournal.
hair

stoned rant/standup jokes

Does anyone else besides me think that salesmen are getting just a tad bit scary these days? I know so many of theses slick salesmen types with 2 or 3 degrees that It makes me just try not to think about the question, Jesus lord, we're fighting psychologists, like what the fuck??? who's watching our backs??? Martha Fucking Stewart? "Now ladies, if you just plan ahead and use the Yellow chiffon instead of the Lavender, you can ward off vacuum cleaner salesmen, but beware the yellow attracts girl scouts, but we love those dear girls *whispered* goddamn them their youth those insolent brats stealing my money, taking my customers I'll crush them all* err nothing says america like girlscouts..."
oh yeah and corporate fraud...
The other day as i was walking past my bosses office i just about crapped my pants cause there was like this strangled scream like a big man sobbing, "I'll buy it just please god shut the fuck up."
I still don't ask about that day... Everytime I see him I can't look him in the eyes cause I keep thinking, oh god he knows i know... who knows what he's capable of? it's like he's a wild animal backed into a corner, he could strike at any moment... he's a ticking time bomb!!! he's arab, i dunno if bomb and arab are good words to use in a sentence you all know what i mean right words like, "my" and "boss" and "is" and "suicide" and "bomber" I'm sure someone in the audience's called 911 by now
someone wanna call 911 back and tell them it's a hoax (sorry boss)... and if they start giving you shit blame it on that guy, no not him the short guy behind... err actually not the short guy, nice muscles by the way frodo...
hair

And I did too!

2:00 AM ...
*zoom*... ...*zooom*...
*mike crackle* hey jonesy is he stoned again?
*crackle* yes mercredi and I think he thinks we don't notice
*crackl* na, more likely he just doesn't care and thinks we don't care...
*crackle* do we care?
*crackle* ...nah...not really.
*crackle* over and out.
  • Current Mood
    stressed stressed
hair

(no subject)

. says:
I want you to get better for my own selfish reasons
Patrick says:
oh yeah?
Patrick says:
why's that honeybunch?
. says:
So I can play more Guild Wars with you.
Patrick says:
you can anyway
. says:
Oh and *coughs* *mumbles*
Patrick says:
speak up
Patrick says:
what blasphemy is this unintelligible mumbling>
.. says:
*smirks*
. says:
I love you?
. says:
So you wanna?
. says:
Later tonight?
Patrick says:
which?
Patrick says:
*smirk*
. says:
Which what?
. says:
Ooo
. says:
BOTH
. says:
Can we do both at the same time?
Patrick says:
could be interesting
. says:
:D
Patrick says:
I've never combined vacuuming and online gaming before though
Patrick says:
might take both hands
. says:
LOL