So yesterday was nicks 21 b-day. and i only talked to him once for 2 minutes yesterday. i just wanted to talk to him to wish him a happy b-day,and to tell him how happy i was that he came into my life but i found out that he went to his ex's brittany's house last night, ans i dont know if he stayed the night or not but that didnt make me to happy.I really wanted to cry but i think im done crying over him, he doesnt deserve for me to care for him as much as i do and he treats me like shit now. Im ready to be happy again.I'm ready to be treated like i deserve to be,and nick doesnt do that with me at all and im tired of it, im putting my foot down and i know sometimes i might want to give in and sometimes i might want to give up, but i have to remember to me right now i dont care if it sounds selfish but i have to be more concerned with my happiness before his.Right now im not even sure if i should be concerned with his.I'm so done with being treating like shit!!!
I took a home pregnancy test 2 nights ago and it came out postive,even though nick and i arent talking to eachother right now i decided to still let him know asap and he wouldnt pick up till the next day and the first thing he says when i told him was"get it aborted" i couldnt believe he had said that to me. i dont want one right now but i still wouldnt do that.it was MY choice why should MY baby have to suffer for it?? its been 3 days now and we still havent worked things out. i just want him to know i miss him and to come home.I really need him right now and i just want things to be better again.but the thing it i dont think he wants that.Where am i gonna live? if he wants me out of his moms house theres not much i can say to that.Oh and by the way i just found out today that i got fired from my job.so recap on past 3 days.i find out im pregnant,nick and i get into a fight,he leaves, he calls me a fucking bitch and to get my shit and leave,i tell him im pregnant,he tells me to get rid of it,the cops come by last night to file a report for the guy who broke in and has been following me and still no word from nick.i miss waking up to him,i miss laying down beside him.i miss laughin with him,dancing with him, i even miss how he has this really WEIRD way of giving me so many butterflies and getting me so excied i literally drool. But most of all i miss him.Im so afraid that he's gone back with brittany to get revenge at me. i want him to come back to me. i want him to be a part of me again. i miss so much taking showers with him.i dont know where to go from here to make things better between us.i hope he hasnt gone back to her and slept with her or any other girl because we're fighting.he gets off of work today at 8 and he supposto come over and we're gonna talk about things so hopefully all goes well. Love me, ~*Margo*~
WOW!!!! life is so crazy when u move out. some in good ways and some in bad ways. you really learn who your friends are.yesterday was horrible. nick and i got into a fight i guess and he called me yesterday morning from his dads house says for me to 'Pack all my shit and get out today.' so i had no choice the kid wants me out of his house im not gonna argue and try to stay i mean its not my house-u know? so i called out of work so i could move out and the fired me for it. I mean its not like i was one of those workers who always called out and slacked off at work. i busted my ass working there!!! i loved my job and i was always picking up extra shifts,going in early,staying late. whenever they needed me i was there. i've been working for them for 2 years now and they're gonna fire me for something so stupid?!?!?!?! and them last night the cops came and i had to file a report for the guy that keeps following me so even if i moved out yesterday and i had the night i still couldnt work night shift,but fileling the report was MUCH MORE important then working,that guy wont stop. and god forbid if something were to happen to me atleast i'd hav$e a report filed. that sucks ,now i dont know what to do,i mean obviously i have to go find a job and a apt. or some place to stay, you come to learn that when u get in a mess like i did yesterday that none of your friends are REALLY there for you like they say they are. thats a horrible thing to go though.but im trying to stay positive about all this. trying to think that before i know it this will all be over and ill have a steady job and a decient place and ill be happy and this will be just another story for my kids.5 months ago my life was so different,i never thought it would be like this. in cae your reading CHERIE:im sorry for everything. i wasnt a good friend to you when u needed me,even when u didn i still wasnt there for you like i should of been.and im getting my karma for it now,and i can say that i do really understand how you feel and im sorry for giving you those bad feeling and i hope you can forgive me.Hopefully one day we can get past this and be good friends again. I just hope i can fully recover from this mess with everything,my job, living situations, nick, and everything else. but i am determined to get through this and make the best out of it that i can. Love me, ~*Margo*~
wow,I havent done this in a really really,long time.im almost not sure what to say even though there's too much to say. So much has been goion on i dont know where to begin.For starters I moved out and im now living with my new boyfriend.that happened jan 2nd 2006.which was kinda soon for us ,but with the way it happened ,we were all we had left,him and i didnt really have anyone else.We're doing so well for moving so fast.but im kinda upset with him right now,he just doesnt know it cause he's sleeping in out room right now.I started Karate, and i love it.i can kick so much more ass now!!!And im so advanced in my belts.too much has happened for me to type it down right now.i just wanna type in here like i never stopped. its good to be back.hopefully i can keep up with this a little better now.well i have some things to do,ill be back in a little bit. Love Me, ~*Margo*~
determined
Its good to be back