THE CHILD REVIVALIST

15 GREAT LESSONS LIFE HAS TAUGHT ME!

It’s great delight to write to you today being a special day, I didn’t plan to do this until I felt led two days ago. Today makes it my twenty-something years on mother Earth… You want to know my age? Kindly read on.

I’ll be sharing *fifteen* lessons life has taught me as I have journeyed through it.

✨Never underestimate the power of networking. If you desire to go far in life, try as much as possible to build your network. It’d help you in no small way, there’s a saying “your network is your networth”: there are actually no truer words than the statement I quoted. Even as parents, know that the network you build today will most likely have effect on your children. Build a strong network, that is what will keep you at the top. You can achieve this by attending conferences and seminars, and rub minds with fellow attendees, exchange contact and keep in touch. Someone once said “to thrive in Lagos, have a police officer, a lawyer, a pastor, an ‘agbero’ i.e area boy as friends.” By doing this, you will have those who can come to your rescue when the need arises, mind you, you don’t only reach out when you need their help, try to keep in touch with them and ‘tip’ them where necessary. Yes, it is not bribery, it is a well-done for what you will do for me.

✨People will come and go. Of course, you don’t expect twenty friends to play together for twenty years. As humans, that is the way we are created to be, we move on in life and to better places. You don’t expect me to remain in a place when there is a better offer waiting for me else where or when I have fulfilled my purpose for coming there in the first place. So, quit being angry when your closest friend is relocating/doing well and pray them well.

✨Your life’s a book. Whether you take it or not, your life is an open book before people’s eyes and they are reading you daily. As a person, you are indirectly affecting those around you, so you have got to be intentionally about your life 8f you have not been before. I have received countless messages in my DM of how someone was affected because of something I did, not something bad though. You might not receive such reports, but be mindful. Time will tell!

✨ Communicate your feelings. This is something that if not done will affect you one way or another. When you keep bottling your feelings, you will have to explode one day. I remember in my early years in life, I was so good and holding everything to myself and once I had anything against you, I will hate you to the core. I lie not, I might not talk to you again just because I couldn’t communicate well. Thanks to God and counsels, I have outgrown it a long time ago.

✨Be there when you can. You can only do something when you have the power to and if not, you just let go. Again, no one is omnipresence except God. Show up, stand by and help others when you can; if you cannot at any moment, do not beat yourself up about it. As far as there isn’t any hard feeling, just take it a step at a time. Don’t try to please everyone, because you cannot in the first place, you will end up hurting yourself. You will be just fine!

✨ Appreciate your cycle in public, not just in private. Don’t beat me just yet, come with me. I have seen people who only appreciate their friends in private but will not say a word for them out there. How do we reconcile this? Is this what we call friendship? Where did we miss it? Friends are to have each others ‘ back at any day, anytime and anywhere. So, quit being a friend by mouth and show it. Your friend is about to launch a brand, you don’t have to necessarily fund it, noise it. They need be to announced, then do it wholeheartedly, after all, that’s what friends are for. I value my friends and what they do. Shout out to you guys, you’re the real MVPs. This will lead to the next important lesson.

✨Be mindful of those you call friends. Not all that glitters is gold and yes, not all who surrounds you mean well for you. That is why I strongly support the motion that says prayerfully choose your friends. Everyone reading this must have heard a sad story of how a so-called friend betrayed the other. It is worthy to have just one person to have your back than have twenty unfaithful friends.

✨Know your place in people’s lives. To avoid stories of woe, know your place. Try to define that friendship before you’re served breakfast, lunch and dinner all in a sitting. You may think the other person takes you as their best friend and you divulge all your life’s history while they only see you as an acquaintance. Oh! It can be so heart-rending and devastating: before you try to be intimate with anyone, test the waters. At least, before you put your leg into any river, you first check the depth? That’s what you should do before you commit to anybody.

✨Not everyone one is meant to be your friend. This point is totally different from the one I stated up there. I repeat, not everyone you come across is meant to have that title called “friendship”. Some just came as colleagues, acquaintances and helpers. While some came for a purpose and will leave after that, some came to stay, while some will come for a stipulated period of time, some will come and be there till death. The sooner you understood this, the better for you.

✨Cherish family. All others will desert you, but family still remains. Friends will go, in fact, best of friends will leave at a point, but family will be. It is true that we don’t have the privilege to choose the one we belong, but we sure have the wherewithal to make it better. Family comes after God, but comes before ministry. Growing up, I have learnt something from my daddy’s lips and it is “where am I going if I don’t carry my family along?” You cannot change your family, but you can make it sweeter.

✨ Expect less from humans. If you can sail through life with this, you do not have problem. Even the Bible says it is vain to put your trust in man. Man will fail you again and again without apology, so why go through these pains when you can simply lift your expectations from them and hand it over to God. It makes life easy after all.

✨Life will not always go as you plan. Many a times, people tend to map out their lives outside God’s plan and when things don’t go as they want, they begin to blame God; they fail to understand that He wasn’t initially in the plan. As I type this, I am vividly playing the sceneries of my early years where I said to myself that “by 25, I must be married…” Look at me today, 25 and counting, not married, happy and living life.

✨Never compare yourself with others. For your wellness, don’t do it. I did this a lot and it took a negative turn on me. I started being inferior, I had low self-esteem, I was angry at myself and at a point, God. It took lot of self-help and external contributions to break free. I am here today, I haven’t arrived, but God is leading me and backing me up. Choose to do life a free person, the onus lies on you.

✨Always appreciate yourself. No matter how little, appreciate yourself, cheer yourself on, you will discover that this singular act has an effect on your output. You have just finished a milestone, treat yourself to a nice meal, gift yourself what others won’t give you. I read a book recently and the writer talked about paying yourself monthly after receiving your salary or after you hit a business deal, you did the work and should be appreciated. Here’s to being more intentional about yourself.

✨ Always put God first. Above all else, honour God. This should have come first, but I chose to put it last. He’s God and will not share His glory with anybody, in whatever you do or say, acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.

I hope these lessons were worthwhile?
You’ve got comments, contributions and reactions, let me know in the comment session.
SimplyRuth

THE GIRL CHILD

The word “girl” means endearment. She should be cherished, nurtured and not treated like a slave or piece of trash. She is the joy of a mother and the pride of a father. She is a pillar and a home builder.

The girl child should not be underestimated, she might be looking weak, but she is not in anyway weak. She was made to stand by the boy child as an “helpmeet”, therefore she is not a weak vessel.

It is said that “behind every successful man, there is a praying woman”, this implies she is not and should not be regarded as an inferior.

The girl child is the FEMALE; the boy child, MALE is coined from “FEmale”.

She is the Forerunner of the male. She goes ahead of the man in every journey of life through prayers. This cannot be overemphasized. She is also the Encourager. She is a source of encouragement and inspiration to all around her.

We are celebrating the girl child today, but do we really appreciate her? The choice of words used on her (abasing or soul lifting), the way we raise her (to be fearful or fearless). Have we instilled timidity in her instead of discipline? Have we killed her self esteem and self worth instead of help her be a better asset to the society at large?

Have we broken her instead of building her? Are we luring her into premature marriage instead of loving her? Have we written her off instead of rewriting the story of her life? Have we given up on her instead of giving her what it takes to rise again? Have we really celebrated her or segregated her?

The Girl Child- Give her what it takes to live again. She is not less of a being, she is not a slave. Let her have a say in the family. She is not a baby making factory neither is her end product in the kitchen. She is not trash. Treat her like a queen, she is one!

SimplyRuth, a girl child.

Unscripted and Unstoppable!

PS: The boy child is not left out either. Treat him with respect too.

Children are the heritage of the Lord and the fruit of the womb is His reward.

#OnceAChild #LoverOfChildren

CHILDREN AND DEPRESSION

Children too can be depressed as far as they are humans too. In this article, we will be looking at causes of, reasons for and solutions to depression in children. Come with me…

In my almost a decade of dealing with children, I have seen them slide bits by bits till they finally slip into depression and it takes divine intervention and a very observant care giver to notice them.

One major cause is improper handling of children whether they are yours or another’s. Children are delicate and should be treated as such. They deserve to be respected and well treated too.

If they are not properly taken care of mentally, physically, spiritually, socially, and all other aspects: they have a very high tendency to be depressed.

As a caregiver, if you have other children in your custody, treat them as you would yours. Treating children in an unfair manner affects their self-esteem on the long run which will in turn tell on their future except such a child is refined; and this cannot make the child become who they were before the harm.

Frederick Douglass said that “It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.” And it’s true. You cannot give a child back their childhood. You cannot undo trauma once it is experienced, you can only alleviate the harm which will still a footprint in the sand of time.

As caregivers, the best we can give to our “gem” is to build them up and not break them up. Tomorrow, they will be whatever we make them to be now. Let us love them and show it, if we do not show them love inside, they would go out to look for it and get it in an uncultured way.

Ask them questions, how they spent their day in school, how their classes went, how they were able to cope in class, if there is anyone bullying them in class. Some of them will not spill all these out until you ask them, they are waiting for you to ask.

Press further by asking how they are dealing with the issus on ground, let them know you are always there for them. Now, I am not saying you should make them too dependent on you, but give them a sense of belonging. After a stressful day outside, do not stress them further inside. Let them have this inward peace that they are coming home to relax and not enter into another feat of arguments or punishments with you.

As for our toddlers, tweens and teens, tell them no one can love them the way you do. Assure them that you will always be there for them. Give them reasons why they have to confide in you.

For young adults, place your hands around their necks and speak those comforting words. Let your children be able to run to you for succour when there is a lot of pressure on the outside. Try as much as possible not to push them out.

Depression is a monster and a killer, kick it far away from your children and watch them grow and glow. Even an adult who experiences depression knows how it feels and kills, let aline our young minds. Let us say “NO” to depression.

May depression be far from our beautiful gifts.
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#NeverBreakThem

MODESTY: Looking Good Without Loosing Your Identity!

To be moderate means bringing something from the extreme in a way that it benefits us.

*Our topic for today is “Modesty: looking good without loosing your identity.”*

Modesty applies to every aspect of human life, but I will be handling the dressing aspect.

In our dispensation, some thought looking good will cost you a fortune, you do not have to necessarily spend your all on dressing. This is called moderation.

Your identity lies in what you portray and how you portray it—- your dressing, how you look, what you wear, how you combine colours and so on.

Do you know when you meet someone for the first time, before you even speak, what you appear on already tells a lot about you. Before you say a word, your dressing determines the way you will be addressed.

You cannot say you are modest, and be showcasing what is meant to be covered. The main purpose of dressing is to cover your nakedness, to glorify God and any other thing follows.

Have it in front of your mind today that you do not and should not dress for the purpose of pleasing man… NO!!

God is not pleased if we uncover what is meant to be covered. Why do you think He made coats for our first father and mother, cos they discovered their nakedness and HE didn’t want it opened. He therefore made them covering.

Dear CIN family, showing your sensitive body parts will not add a cubit to your statue, neither will it add to your achievements. It will not devalue your worth.

Philippians 4:5 Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand.

Let be known that you, sis Tolu and bro Sanya, are modest in the way to appear. You do not have to be the richest man in Babylon to look good. With the little you have, you can look gorgeous and be admired by people.

If you can’t afford a boutique, you don’t have to beat yourself up about it. There is second hand clothes you can buy, wash them, iron them and march on to victory. They will even look new on you as if they are from classic boutique. It won’t even be known till you say it is second hand.☺☺

As a sister, you don’t wear flay top on flay skirts, it looks somehow.

You don’t wear red, green, blue, yellow all together in the name of dressing. Who are you rioting with abeg?

You don’t wear different pattern of top on another pattern of skirt… Ahnahn!

Let the people of the world see Jesus in you. Our Jesus is not a shabby Jesus. Let them see your outlook and glorify God, let them want to be like you.

Still on sisters, you don’t wear slippers when going out especially to a program or event. Get beautiful sandals and shoes. Someone will say slippers is free and fine in my legs Let people not identify them with you.

Don’t always go around with your hair covered except to church. This act even makes your hair smell, when it is always covered. Keep it opened except you want to pray.

Sisters, wash your hair, make it or style it beautifully when going out. Let it not be said among us that our hair smells. That smell repels.

Look neat, make your face look clean and free of acne. If you can, get oil control products and use instead of going about with oily face. It isn’t presentable.

Sistersssss, we are home keepers. If we can keep ourselves, how do we intend to keep our homes?

Ponder this!

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Away from sisters, to our beloved brothers.

Learn to polish those shoes, let them not be looking like you’re just coming from farm when actually you just left home.

Learn to combine colours, please shave/comb those hairs and beards.

In fact, a popular saying is “cleanliness is next to godliness”. You can’t say you’re godly and be portraying dirtiness. It’s a NO NO!

As we dress modestly, let us also be neatly dressed. Smell nice, don’t let people be covering their noses when they come close to you.

As a lady, when you are all dressed up, do people refer to you as “slay queen, pa won, kill them…” Ah! If positive is the case, there’s fire on the mountain. Check yourself.

Who are you slaying? Who do want to kill? You shouldn’t dress to kill anyone, but to glorify God.

1 Corinthians 6:20 says For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.

Let your body glorify God, let your dressing glorify God, let your all glorify God. All that you are and have are God’s. Therefore, let His glory be seen all around you.

*Remember, your identity lies in your dressing.*

Let modesty be written over you,
Think modesty!
Wear modesty!
Carry modesty!
Work modesty!
Walk modesty!
Talk modesty!
Breathe modesty!
Everything modesty, let it be written all over you.

See, it gives you a sense of humour and confidence. You don’t have to feel among; others may, I cannot. Stand out, my people.

When you stand for Christ, you fall for nothing… Know this and know peace.

PATIENCE!

*PATIENCE.*

“Patience” is gotten from the compound word “patient”. And to be patient means to be willing to wait where necessary and not loosing one’s temper while waiting, according to the dictionary.

There are two ways to this, it is one thing to *wait* without loosing your temper, it is another thing to wait and end up being angry for waiting so long. The former is what is termed as being patient, the latter is not patience at all.

You see, we are made to understand that no matter how long we wait, if we end up being angry, then we are not patient enough.

Our waiting period can be so tiring, frustrating and may seem unending, but it pays to wait patiently for the appointed time.

Waiting period encapsulates all spheres of life: it may be in seeking for a job, trusting God to conceive, seriously seeking admission, maybe waiting for Mr or Mrs right, applying for scholarships but none seem to be in the light, it might be that you are hoping for a promotion in your place of work, maybe even waiting for a credit alert… Anything you maybe waiting patiently for, I implore you to keep waiting and trusting God for the best.

*The wait maybe so long, but your reward will be worth the wait.*

Maybe you are at the verge of giving up; do not give up, my dear. The best is yet to come. It may tarry, but it will surely come.

Even the Holy Writ asks us to add *patience* to our Christian virtues. The vision God has for you is for an appointed time, it shall speak; though it may tarry, wait for it for it will surely come to fulfilment.

If you’re finding it hard to wait, why don’t you wait upon the Lord? He shall renew your strength, strength like that of the eagle.

Hello, while you wait, get busy!
By the time your waiting period ends, you won’t be so bothered to enjoy your blessings.

*Patience is a virtue. It takes grace to be patient. Ask God for such grace today.*

… IN THE WAY HE SHOULD GO!

Babies do not always remain babies forever. They grow to become adults and as they grow, they are influenced by what they see you do and what they hear you say.

The Holy Writ (Bible) says “train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old, he would not depart from it.” This implies that a child should be trained in his own way, not in his parents’ way not in his brother’s way.

Every child is unique in his own way and should be treated uniquely. No two children can be raised the same way, even twin can not.

As parents, when next it seems difficult correcting your lovelies; try to study them and see how they want to be taught and corrected. By so doing, you will find it easy raising them.

For instance, a child wants to be called and corrected in love, but if as a parent, you use the rod or call the child abusive names, it would produce next to no results.

For positive results in correcting our little ones, let us help them grow in their own way. It remains the best way in training them. They would love you for coming down to their level. And who a child loves, he obeys.

This is another way to earn a child’s love, and keep it. Children also deserve some freedom, let us not choke them with our rules, principles and regulations.

There are some instances where you ask a child to do somethings, but he questions your instructions. In such situations, you should not beat or abuse the child, but make him see reasons why he should do what he is asked to do.

To training our children well, I say cheers. 🥂🥂

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#TrainThem #BearThemUp #DontTearThemDown

CHILDREN AND DISCIPLINE!

Children are humans too, they are not dolls neither are they mannequins.

They have emotions, they have feelings and they are entitled to it. Sometimes, they know when they have done wrong and they expect us as parents/guardians/care givers to correct them in love.

As a parent, you should be proud that your child(ren) is/are outspoken. If you try to scream at them all in the name of correcting them, you would end up destroying their self esteem. You would chase them back to their shell, which is unhealthy for them as well as you.

When they have done wrong, you call them to order, not by shouting at them. No! It is very wrong. Especially for toddlers and youngsters.

Rather, sit down with them, tell them what they have done wrong, why it is not good and why they should not do so again. By do doing, when next they intend doing something wrong, they would remember how you corrected them. “The rod” should not always be used on them. No! Do not always flog them. It is even unhealthy for them.

But there are exceptions, when a child has been corrected time and time again, but chooses to remain adamant, spanking can be introduced. But should still be done in a loving way. Like spanking the child this minute and the next, you explain to them that you love them and that is why you did what you did.

Also, in loving them, try as much as possible not to indulge them. No, do not take nonsense from them neither should you pamper them.

As parents, we need to be firm in our discipline. In the few years I have spent around children, I don’t condone bad habits, but I play a lot with them. Children are lovely and loving, but it takes grace to deal with them (winks).

Children, God’s heritage!

Do not spare the rod and spoil the child. Do not spoil the child with the rod.

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#ChildLover #DisciplineAChild

~~Do not batter child,~~ rather better them!

CHILDREN, GOD’S HERITAGE.

Behold, they are heritage of the Lord and the fruit of the womb, His reward.

God gave us children as gifts from Him and He expects us to nurture and culture them. Not to leave them to the hurts of the enemy. He gave them to us, He would ask of us how we cared for them. He will require them from us.

Parents/guardians/care givers, take care of them as you would yourself. They are our future, they are our tomorrow.

They are our foundation and if the foundation be destroyed, what can the righteous do.