locked。
old fic is open, for the most part (all new writing can be found over at
liquivores, ftr). everything else is locked.» currently adding.
old fic is open, for the most part (all new writing can be found over at
liquivores, ftr). everything else is locked.» currently adding.
and we'd left our love in our summer skin.
[notes: narutaru, bungo/satomi. wrote it in around half an hour? idk it was mostly just getting something out for the sake of it because fic-wise i've been in kind of a funk lately. might actually add capitals later. and i really wish i knew someone who was actually familiar with this canon, haha.]
he calls, the night before she starts at Banda. she answers half by reflex and half by weakness, although in the end they are maybe the same things, here in the quiet smallness of her mother's house and in the awful enormity of her Banda uniform—she meets his voice alight with static like she had met the pieces of his breath in her mouth last year. the taste of them is almost still there, lying under her tongue, in the foam of the spit that collects behind her teeth.
"is this really what you want?" he says to her, slow and soft, like the beginning to a sigh. it is almost the tone he had used for her on that day they'd shed their miseries together: the two of them, pitiful humans making each other into the shape of one another's unhappiness. satomi smooths out the creases in her skirt over and over again and feels frighteningly pitiful. she feels as though she had never grown up.
"yes," she says, and resists the urge to fall where amapola is flying. she bites back his name in her mouth. "i—," she starts, and stops, because she realises that she had no idea what she was going to say. she suddenly feels inexplicably breathless.
"bungo," she says, giving in. amapola surges into the sky, and when she closes her eyes there is a sea of stars behind them. bungo makes some small noise that could almost be her name. she traces her jawbone with her fingernail and tries to imagine the feel of it against her mouth, one last time. (you could have it again, if you wanted. it could be the last piece of selfishness you let yourself have, or maybe the first. you could tell him "let's start over, let's try again" and he would never say no. but then, isn't that the last difference between you? he is content with his pitiful life and selfish human wants and he is content to settle for what he has.)
"—i don't need you anymore," satomi says, and falls-through, falls forever. there is silence for a long time before the dial tone sounds in her ear and immediately afterwards she almost considers calling him back but doesn't. there would be nothing at all to say.
(you are not.)
he calls, the night before she starts at Banda. she answers half by reflex and half by weakness, although in the end they are maybe the same things, here in the quiet smallness of her mother's house and in the awful enormity of her Banda uniform—she meets his voice alight with static like she had met the pieces of his breath in her mouth last year. the taste of them is almost still there, lying under her tongue, in the foam of the spit that collects behind her teeth.
"is this really what you want?" he says to her, slow and soft, like the beginning to a sigh. it is almost the tone he had used for her on that day they'd shed their miseries together: the two of them, pitiful humans making each other into the shape of one another's unhappiness. satomi smooths out the creases in her skirt over and over again and feels frighteningly pitiful. she feels as though she had never grown up.
"yes," she says, and resists the urge to fall where amapola is flying. she bites back his name in her mouth. "i—," she starts, and stops, because she realises that she had no idea what she was going to say. she suddenly feels inexplicably breathless.
"bungo," she says, giving in. amapola surges into the sky, and when she closes her eyes there is a sea of stars behind them. bungo makes some small noise that could almost be her name. she traces her jawbone with her fingernail and tries to imagine the feel of it against her mouth, one last time. (you could have it again, if you wanted. it could be the last piece of selfishness you let yourself have, or maybe the first. you could tell him "let's start over, let's try again" and he would never say no. but then, isn't that the last difference between you? he is content with his pitiful life and selfish human wants and he is content to settle for what he has.)
"—i don't need you anymore," satomi says, and falls-through, falls forever. there is silence for a long time before the dial tone sounds in her ear and immediately afterwards she almost considers calling him back but doesn't. there would be nothing at all to say.
(you are not.)
europe it easy 2011 edition -- now with soundtrack
oh hai erin sup gurl
you know what to do
siren song (homestuck fic; mindfang/redglare)
title: siren song
fandom: homestuck (spoilers for recent updates!)
pairing: mindfang♠redglare (hinted to be mutual, but more obvious on mindfang's side)
rating: T, for vague descriptions of violence and implied sex.
words: 2213
notes: i...don't actually know whether i like this or not? my feelings on it change every re-read, pffft. i will say that it was genuinely pretty fun to write, though! man do i love dem ancestors. love.
summary: She is the Marquise, and she will always win.
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fandom: homestuck (spoilers for recent updates!)
pairing: mindfang♠redglare (hinted to be mutual, but more obvious on mindfang's side)
rating: T, for vague descriptions of violence and implied sex.
words: 2213
notes: i...don't actually know whether i like this or not? my feelings on it change every re-read, pffft. i will say that it was genuinely pretty fun to write, though! man do i love dem ancestors. love.
summary: She is the Marquise, and she will always win.
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four drabbles; various
fandoms: persona 4, hourou musuko, narutaru, pokémon b/w.
wordcount: altogether, 698.
rating: i don't think there's anything in here above a PG? the narutaru bit has slight mentions of murder but it's not graphic at all.
notes: um. i have absolutely no idea why elesa/skyla is so popular with the fanartists and what basis it even has, but for some reason i'm off writing fic for it. yup. and
carmentakoshi, i'm really sorry but your kanji/souji fic will likely take a lot longer than i thought it would and will probably not even be the fic i want to write. i am trying, but i'm having a lot of trouble even getting it started, so...apologies? i hope that teeny-tiny k/s thing here will be enough for you in the meantime!
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wordcount: altogether, 698.
rating: i don't think there's anything in here above a PG? the narutaru bit has slight mentions of murder but it's not graphic at all.
notes: um. i have absolutely no idea why elesa/skyla is so popular with the fanartists and what basis it even has, but for some reason i'm off writing fic for it. yup. and
carmentakoshi, i'm really sorry but your kanji/souji fic will likely take a lot longer than i thought it would and will probably not even be the fic i want to write. i am trying, but i'm having a lot of trouble even getting it started, so...apologies? i hope that teeny-tiny k/s thing here will be enough for you in the meantime!( Collapse )
hey hallelujah (P3 fic; takaya/jin)
title: hey hallelujah
fandom: persona 3
rating: T for some disturbing themes (emotional manipulation/abuse, murder).
wordcount: 1354
pairing: manipulative!takaya/jin
notes: but like what the fuck is this? it's takaya being a giant douche, that's what.
also i think that piece of headcanon about jin having takaya's evoker came from gwen but i'm not sure. to explain that bit: takaya gives jin his evoker because, well, it's comforting. it doesn't have the same memories that jin associates with his evoker - although any evoker would make him remember being at kirijo, his represents some particularly awful stuff to him because it's the one he was given for the experiments. he kind of "imprinted" on it, i guess.
and can i just say that thinking up summaries is literally the hardest part of writing, for me? because seriously. i've been sitting here for like half an hour and NOTHING. oh whatever have some awful fic already.
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fandom: persona 3
rating: T for some disturbing themes (emotional manipulation/abuse, murder).
wordcount: 1354
pairing: manipulative!takaya/jin
notes: but like what the fuck is this? it's takaya being a giant douche, that's what.
also i think that piece of headcanon about jin having takaya's evoker came from gwen but i'm not sure. to explain that bit: takaya gives jin his evoker because, well, it's comforting. it doesn't have the same memories that jin associates with his evoker - although any evoker would make him remember being at kirijo, his represents some particularly awful stuff to him because it's the one he was given for the experiments. he kind of "imprinted" on it, i guess.
and can i just say that thinking up summaries is literally the hardest part of writing, for me? because seriously. i've been sitting here for like half an hour and NOTHING. oh whatever have some awful fic already.
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brothers on a hotel bed (P3 fic; trans!akihiko; shinji/aki)
title: brothers on a hotel bed
fandom: persona 3
rating: M, for language and...well, i kind of chickened out when it came to the smut buuut i guess there's still some kind of explicit stuff in there?
wordcount: 1608
pairing: akihiko/shinjiro
summary: Akihiko knows that he's lucky—nobody dares to give you shit for these things when you can hit as hard as he does. (ftm!Akihiko)
notes:
>write fic that you're really proud of
>re-read it for errors
>realise that it only barely follows canon
DOUSHIO
did akihiko and mitsuru (and shinji too i guess) even go into tartarus before minato and the rest showed up? why the fuck did i think minato and yukari were supposed to arrive at the dorms together (but minato couldn't for whatever reason and showed up a week or two after yukari)? no seriously it's turning out that most of what i remember from P3 is completely made up and this is kind of freaking me out
whatever, idgaf if i messed everything up, i really do like how this fic turned out. and i'm honestly not up for re-writing the whole thing, because there are just too many parts i feel turned out exactly how i wanted and i don't want to ruin it. so let's just call it an AU that's really close to canon except everything's in like...the wrong order, i guess.
and for some reason, my headcanon for Akihiko is that he was a total deliquent before he met Mitsuru—and even then, he still took a really long time with her to mellow the fuck out. i...seriously have no idea where this came from.
okay rambling over. LET'S GO
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fandom: persona 3
rating: M, for language and...well, i kind of chickened out when it came to the smut buuut i guess there's still some kind of explicit stuff in there?
wordcount: 1608
pairing: akihiko/shinjiro
summary: Akihiko knows that he's lucky—nobody dares to give you shit for these things when you can hit as hard as he does. (ftm!Akihiko)
notes:
>write fic that you're really proud of
>re-read it for errors
>realise that it only barely follows canon
DOUSHIO
did akihiko and mitsuru (and shinji too i guess) even go into tartarus before minato and the rest showed up? why the fuck did i think minato and yukari were supposed to arrive at the dorms together (but minato couldn't for whatever reason and showed up a week or two after yukari)? no seriously it's turning out that most of what i remember from P3 is completely made up and this is kind of freaking me out
whatever, idgaf if i messed everything up, i really do like how this fic turned out. and i'm honestly not up for re-writing the whole thing, because there are just too many parts i feel turned out exactly how i wanted and i don't want to ruin it. so let's just call it an AU that's really close to canon except everything's in like...the wrong order, i guess.
and for some reason, my headcanon for Akihiko is that he was a total deliquent before he met Mitsuru—and even then, he still took a really long time with her to mellow the fuck out. i...seriously have no idea where this came from.
okay rambling over. LET'S GO
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kh fic; my body is a cage
fandom: kingdom hearts
pairing: axel/sora, with very very slight sora/riku.
a/n: this is forshesayslove, who is wonderful and amazing and wrote me something incredibly beautiful ♥ and i hope that this is good enough, and that i will do your (and my) favourite pairing justice.
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pairing: axel/sora, with very very slight sora/riku.
a/n: this is for
shesayslove, who is wonderful and amazing and wrote me something incredibly beautiful ♥ and i hope that this is good enough, and that i will do your (and my) favourite pairing justice.pokémon black & white - four and twenty blackbirds
fandom: pokémon black & white
pairing: n x touya
rated: i'm going to err on the side of caution and say maybe a 15 or whatever the american equivalent is. pg-14 or something. also, warning for pretty dubious consent. and…possible shota? i actually don't know how old either n or touya are supposed to be. i always thought they were both around 18, but there are some who think they're younger.
a/n: i actually don't have a summary for this. pffft. i'm sure i'll think of one by the time i get around to posting this on AO3 + ff.net. or maybe i won't actually post this outside of here. whatever, we'll see. oh and btw the title has nothing to do with the fic. it just doesn't okay
tbh, i'm a little apprehensive about this. it's not really porn or smut at all, but it does have some vaguely sexual stuff in it and idk if everyone in fandom feels okay with underage ficcers writing about sex at all :\ honestly, i'm not all that sure i'm comfortable with me writing about sex. but i finished something. this is actually finished, and regardless of whatever hang-ups i may have about it, that's enough to make me want to post it.
although, i must say: i feel like this could be better. a lot better. there are parts i'm not happy with at all, and tbh the overall feeling is completely different from what i wanted. it's a lot more...disjointed, than i'd like. but you know what? i don't even care. i've finished something, and that's all i wanted. ( Collapse )
pairing: n x touya
rated: i'm going to err on the side of caution and say maybe a 15 or whatever the american equivalent is. pg-14 or something. also, warning for pretty dubious consent. and…possible shota? i actually don't know how old either n or touya are supposed to be. i always thought they were both around 18, but there are some who think they're younger.
a/n: i actually don't have a summary for this. pffft. i'm sure i'll think of one by the time i get around to posting this on AO3 + ff.net. or maybe i won't actually post this outside of here. whatever, we'll see. oh and btw the title has nothing to do with the fic. it just doesn't okay
tbh, i'm a little apprehensive about this. it's not really porn or smut at all, but it does have some vaguely sexual stuff in it and idk if everyone in fandom feels okay with underage ficcers writing about sex at all :\ honestly, i'm not all that sure i'm comfortable with me writing about sex. but i finished something. this is actually finished, and regardless of whatever hang-ups i may have about it, that's enough to make me want to post it.
although, i must say: i feel like this could be better. a lot better. there are parts i'm not happy with at all, and tbh the overall feeling is completely different from what i wanted. it's a lot more...disjointed, than i'd like. but you know what? i don't even care. i've finished something, and that's all i wanted.