I don't get why they think that this sort of action will get them anywhere. Haven't they learned from 9/11 that nothing changes on our stance on terrorism?! For feck's sake!
True, i have been meaning to ask you about the Bjork DVD i burnt for you and sent with your b-day package...did you already have it and can you view it ok on your DVD player?
My husband has successfully downloaded Bjork's new album in advance. We will of course, be buying it when it comes out. I can't wait to hear it! Does anyone want an advance copy?
Also, have you heard of the NY based band Stellastar*? If not, make it your life's ambition to get their album! Ok, so that's just how I feel about them. But their quirky pop anthems are a mix of many great 80's bands, with the perfect updated sound for the naughties (00's). In a time when the British charts are flooded with boybands and crap pop music, this is the best new album we have listened to in what seems like ages.
Maybe some day i'll update my journal with stuff about the rest of my life....
i know i don't call often, and don't often reply to your posts. but you should know that i am always here and i always care...and i will...always.
i am deeply sorry for your situation, for your gran's illness, for your family's inconceivable behavior...and for the burden you have to bear all the time because of it.
you are a pillar of strength and an asset to this planet and all the people on it. don't ever for one minute doubt that you are a wonderful person and think that you deserve any of the treatment you get from your family and from your own body.
your gran knows who she can trust. i'm sure she knows that you are fighting for her, fighting to keep things how they should be.
i'm glad your mom came home. if she didn't though, you would have know that you did your best to convince her that she should have, and that the guilt would no longer be on your shoulders because it was her decision.
sometimes, the good people in the world have the hardest shite to deal with. sometimes things go right but most of the time, we have to slog our guts out just to get through the day. one day there will be a reckoning. i only hope that you aren't too jaded when that day comes.
keep your chin up. you have so much love around you...so many people who want the best for you. everyone is pulling for your gran and for you to get through your health problems. i know you will because you're fighter and you don't give up. deep down you'd rather roll over. but you won't. i know also that you put on a brave face for us all but you have a heavy heart...and it's weighing you down with each passing day.
you are my best friend...equal only to that of my husband (but hey, i have to count him in because it's only fair) and i love you. you have always been my guiding light when i needed you most. i think now you need some guiding of your own. let us all who love you help you, even if it's just by listening/reading, learning and replying to your posts. you matter to us all. we all wish you the best. though you are filled with sadness, you are not alone at all.
firstly, congrats to true and her fam! you will be fine.
n and i spent a long weekend in wales. we took day trips to Hay-on-Wye (a must for any booker lover...ahem, lindsay!!!) & Brecon and Aberystwyth and Devil's Bridge...an amazing water fall that you have to climb down forever to get to but boy was it worth it.
Hay was a fantastically enchanting village full of bookshops. they're everywhere...so many that you'd spend all day just seeing books. it was so pretty there. unfortunately n isn't a big book lover, so i'll have to go back either on my own, or with his dad, who shares my love for browsing through old books.
it was also nice to see the welsh seaside. the country is fantastic as a whole, and driving anywhere is a pleasure, not a chore. i felt so at peace and was amazed round every bend in the road. what a treat it was to be priviledged to see all that beauty. what i love the most, is the way the sun peeks out from the clouds and lights up portions of the hills, and makes them glow. we could have spent all day taking photos!
true, you must come visit us next spring when you're settled!!!
Autumn is my favourite season. the colours are absolutely awe-inspiring. the leaves are just starting to fall, which makes for truly enchanting moments when driving through a tree covered lane. and it's starting to get cold again. we used our central heating this morning, and i had to break out my slippers last night. and the car windows need to be defrosted before leaving for work. i can't wait for Bonfire Night!
it's raining, and it hasn't rained in awhile. i'm sure my car is enjoying the "wash".
i did nothing much of any significance this weekend, except drive to wolverhampton with n. we went into Etam, to try and find me some new trousers for work, you know, ones that fit and don't hang so baggy that they're practically falling down? but instead of trying things on then, we decided to look in other 'larger sizes' shops, and come back to Etam later. well, it turns out that 'later' meant the shop was closed! grr, i hate sundays because everything closes early here. so, i didn't get any new trousers and the ones i'm currently wearing are dragging on the floor. but if i keep up the way i ate this weekend, they won't stay that way! i had waaaaayyy too much chocolate! it's cadbury's fault! they had to go and put crunchie mint bits in their choccie, and i just can't keep my fingers off it! it's like cruchie andes mints only with better chocolate! mmmmmmmm
but, we did get something in wolves. we got new pillows (triangle ones that were designed by a dr to help breathing, snoring, headaches and tension), new work shoes for n, and the new singles from Unkle (An Eye for an Eye) and Longview (the name escapes me). We heard Unkle on Radio 1 whilst down in Bristol over the bank holiday. n liked it a lot and has been raving about it...funnily, we only now got round to buying it. we heard Longview on Radio 1 while driving home from work. there hasn't been much new music that either of us has liked, and really feel that britain's pop music scene is destroying good music. so this was a nice change. i would highly recommend these to anyone. the video for eye for an eye is wicked too.
oh, and we also stopped in a pub and watched Man Utd take on Arsenal...and had our hopes dashed when Nistleroy missed his penalty in injury time....double ouch. Arsenal players were bang out of order after the final whistle though and i hope the FA takes action.
i've also started to crochet a blanket for winter. it gets so cold in our lounge so i thought a wool blanket would do nicely whilst cuddling on the setee. but it's been so long since i've crocheted that i've forgotten how to do it! argh. it's coming back to me slowly but the pattern is suffering for it. i'm sure it will take shape soon enough, after i've done enough rows. fingers crossed.
oh yeah, and i heard on the news yesterday that petrol prices are set to go up even higher than they already are! it's not fair that in the US, people pay an equivalent to 29p a litre for gas, and we pay 75p! now it's set to go up near enough 2p a litre! talk about fleecing the nation...this country's priorities are whacked! they don't call it Rip Off Britain for nothing!
and so that ends my whinging session. true, has dh found out yet about the job??
i passed my driving test and now have my independence back. we can go where we please, when we please, and we can get soda, beer, milk and washing detergent all at once in the supermarket and not have to worry about carrying it. it's such a wonderful feeling...once i get past the nervousness of passing parked cars on narrow roads.
i have driven to work the past two days. i drop n off at work, then for the first time, i drove on my own. scary, but a wonderful feeling. the main problem i have is that i don't know the area like the back of my hand...not like living in OC. that's what makes me nervous on top of narrow roads. it's one thing knowing how to drive, but another entirely when you don't know where you're going! i'll get there in the end...it just takes time and practise! too bad it took about $40 to fill my tank. i can't remember off the top of my head how many litres of petrol it was, but i would imagine that it was about 8 gallons in all. the average car in the states is what, about 12-15. so, that's twice as much money for less fuel. grrr.
then again, this is rip-off britain. ahhh, but the scenery is great. we drove to wales after i passed my test. it's a confidence booster to drive to another country on your first day as a licensed driver! ok, so wales isn't THAT far away...but hey, country lanes and the sun going down, and not being familiar with the area...i think i did good!
we went walking up the sound of music hill, and picked blackberries on the way down. MIL made apple and blackberry crumble, and a pie for us to take home. i got a lesson on how to wash them (looking out for grubs in the berries), and will try my hand at making my own pie next time! mmmm, yum. wild berries are gorgeous! i can't wait for chestnut season...and bonfire night...and christmas!
my favourite time of year is coming up and we are beginning to feel like a real couple now that we have a car. it's wonderful, and life is looking up. now, i only need a full-time job. the agency is on to two jobs for me, so hopefully i'll get some interviews shortly. fingers crossed.
i hope everyone is well...i'll try to update more often!
i was wrong....very wrong...about that job. i didn't get the interview. instead, i came home friday to a short letter saying thanks but no thanks....candidates were of an extremely high calibur...tough decision...yadda yadda, i can't remember because i tossed it away from me, ran upstairs to the bathroom and had a good cry.
so now i must rebuild my confidence and find something else. i've just had a look at www.cangteach.gov.uk that may be my saving grace. if i'm ever going to do this teaching lark, now's the time. no more excuses.
in other news...had a good weekend. n spent most of it rebuilding his dad's pc. his bro gave him a pc, but dear lord, it was filthy. he had burned a candle on top of the monitor, and wax got in the inside! wt?? who does that?!?!
i have been eating more than i should, and treating myself to things, but i don't care. i deserve a mini break. i'll get back on track next week. i'm in this for the long haul, and this is the first time in nearly 4 months that i've felt the need to go off the rails a bit. that's pretty darn good for staying motivated! this from an extremely lazy individual.
my neck hurts. i'm leaving in 5 mins to go pick up a packet from the post office. i've no idea who it's from, but i'm thinking it's either concert tickets or something from Walkers. i apparently won some stickers or promo items from a bag of crisp i bought awhile back. whoopie. it's probably crap. shame it couldn't have been one of the entertainment packs they had going. or money. but i never win anything.
i'm in a blah/whinging/pity me mood. can you tell?? mental note: must GET OVER IT!!
