Randominity

This is the story of a mesmer named Bleh.



It all started Saturday night when vandonovan and I were playing around with character creation on Guild Wars. I made mention of a particularly interesting character face I had seen in the options for Factions mesmers; mesmers being known for looking either aloof or disdainful, but always, always gorgeous, well-coiffed, and dressed to the nines. As an example, here is the mesmer I created for Nightfall:


She's supposed to be my doppleganger, but if I looked like that, I would BE A MODEL, HELLO.

Note the shiny, noble clothing, the beauty mark, the I'm-better-than-you expression. And this isn't even the most elaborate hairstyle or the most beautiful face. She looks downright average compared to some of the other options. So imagine my surprise when I saw this option among the Factions mesmers:


Oh, snap.

I mean, she's not wearing any makeup, her eyes are all dull and glazed over, and her ears stick out. She's not..... well, UGLY... exactly, but I'd say she's definitely on the homely side of plain. And considering the rest of the mesmer choices, she straight-up seems out of place. So I was saying to vandonovan that I could just see this poor girl growing up white trash, determined to be a mesmer like the cool rich girls, and everyone would be like "oh, sure you can, honey," all condescending. But she'd show them, she'd show them all! She'd go to mesmer school and all the cool girls would shun her but she would work her little butt off and become the best mesmer ever! And maybe she'd be a little slow, so it would be even more tragic/funny/poignant. And vandonovan pointed out that she'd be just like Princess Clara's "special" cousin Bleh, and we died laughing.

I realized that I would actually be interested in playing a character like this, with a story like this. I'd be rooting for her that much more! So I set about creating the ugliest mesmer possible. First with that atrocious hair color (what color is that? I don't know, but it doesn't appear in nature!), the least-flattering, just-rolled-out-of-bed hairstyle, the palest, most wan shade of skin, and an orange outfit, just to clash.


I loved her immediately.

For her name, we'd agreed it would have to be something with Bleh in it, as an homage, and we tossed around some options like Elizablehth... which made us think of Stargate Atlantis and toy around with the idea that she could be Weir's "special" long-lost cousin or something, ahahaha. It didn't click, though, until I came up with Blehthany as a first name, and vandonovan suggested her last name be Sheppard. Because, yes. Blehthany would TOTALLY be Sheppard's secret shameful slow-witted ugly cousin, who left home and her humble beginnings to go to the academy to train as a mesmer. And then she visits Atlantis and everyone's all "o_O ....John?" and John's like "hey, I'm proud of her, okay?" ♥

(also in my head, in whole 'nother AU, she maybe hooks up with Grant Jansky, who is a genius, sure, but not the most functional crayon in the box. Together they'd be a barely functional unit and would hug a lot!)

Favorite. Character. EVER. I'd always thought that as a mesmer I would spend tons of money on the sexiest, laciest, silkiest outfit for my super!hot character, but now with Blehthany I'm saving up my cash for the most absurd, tacky, ugly-colored mismatched mesmer armor, and I'm going to LOVE IT.