i mentioned that
etoile_noir had sent me a postcard and the biggest thing that struck me was that she mentioned that my optimism was not without doubt. this is something of huge importance to my outlook on life and unfortunately may not be noticed if you just scratch the surface of what comes out here. i do make a point to strike out the negative things that i want to write about but not because i'm hiding from the negativity or because i want to pretend that negativity doesn't exist in my life. that would be irresponsible and would be detrimental to keeping and acknowledging the wonderful points in my life.
the problem isn't with the existence of negativity in and of itself but how we choose to acknowledge and deal with negativity. for the sake of relevance, you can just look at your friend's list for an example of this. how do people on their deal with negativity? it's amusing in it's own right that you hear people spouting off about how much they hate life and then the next entry, whether it's an hour later or three days, is "well things are better..." always! unfortunately, we seem to have short term memory loss when going through this because we forget the next time what happened the last time.
an old eastern proverb:
if it is not broken
do not fix it
if it is broken
and you cannot fix it
do not worry about it
it certainly presents a simplified view of how to deal with negativity and it's hardly ever that easy. the point however is relevant. if we can't fix something, then why do we hold onto it? why do we always expect to have everything fixed right this moment? do we need to be "okay" every moment of our lives?
we also have to realize that our negativity affects others. when i see someone going on a rant about how much the hate someone, something i usually just skip over the whole entry. now this is the important part, if you want to write about something that is going on in your life, something that makes you angry or sad or miserable, do it! however, please please do not release that negativity without clamping a giant steel ball around it's legs. the steel ball of course is countering negativity with reasoning. in my experience, things are honestly never as bad as they seem. things are never hopeless. there is always beauty and hope in every situation. don't just add negativity to our culture that feeds on it. tell us what pissed you off but also tell us how you plan to deal with it, tell us how you will fix it. or even on the very simple but important level, tell us that you know that it's bad but that it won't always be. sometimes when we are having horrible times, the last thing we want to do is dwell on it in ANY way, so just acknowledge that things always work out as they are supposed to. say it even if you don't immediately believe it. it will always lessen the blow of those dark forces that want to grasp your heart and squeeze the life out of it.
so when i say, be positive, you're goddamn right i mean in EVERYTHING. don't pretend, don't ignore.. but recognize the positive in anything. recognize what the negative will bring, what it can teach you and what you will be able to say of it when it sees only your back as you walk away from it.
in the end, negativity and pessimism is foolish, irresponsible and illogical. there is always hope, in everything, in the simplest of things that you ignore. every time the sun rises... that is hope.
love & hope (always)
benny
