reasons nightcrawler is just like me:
1. three apples tall
2. loves his big sister so much
3. loves his big sister and her goofy ahh boyfriend and is their #1 hype man
4. existential guilt
5. spirituality focused on trying to see how there is beauty and love everywhere if you look for it but damn folks make it hard sometime
6. weirdly successful at poker historically
7. existential guilt
8. pacifist until someone says something about my family and im ready to die defending them
9. suspect that my sister's more important to me than i am to her but i'm not really bothered by that because i'm just happy to be her little sibling
10. existential guilt
I will create a beautiful life no matter what
dearest nerds of the depths of online, i seek a deeply meaningful favor
TL;DR - where do i start reading xmen comics with the most sense of chronology/release order as a lifelong fan whose autism does not like comic format but thru the power of public libraries were recently made accessible
Context cause my brain always deems it abivr mandatory:
☆probs autistic, years of peer review under the belt but yet to grow the balls to request an actual assessment
☆deeply and lowk problamatically possessive of my interests cause im scared of having to explain/perform/validate how i feel about them so sharing this feels vulnerable especially cause im very scared what im about to say will confirm that i dont like it "enough" or correctly or anything
☆I FREAKIMG LOVE THE XMEN YUM YUM YUM MUNCH CRUNCH CHOMP i grew up on the movies and have had an emotional support nightcrawler action figure since elementary school and kurt wagner is my pookielicious
ALL OF THE ABOVE LEAD TO MY CURRENT PREDICAMENT:
i have tried soooooooooo many times to read comics. truly believe me i have and every time i end up feeling confused and overwhelmed and atupid and like my brain is going to explode because i cant follow the formatting and there are random full page inserts and sometimes multiple stories in one book and i cant tell where they begin and end, and i can never identify a chronological order so i always feel like im reading them wrong because i want chronology (even with the irony of xmens timeline craziness, i know) like i shit you not i have cried before just from the baffling headache of trying to follow a comic book.
BUT‼️ dear reader. PUBLIC LIBRARIES ARE A TREASURE. if you know me you know i will never pass an opportunity to hype up public libraries and all their glory so allow me to glaze this beautiful service called HOOPLA, where you can sign in to your library with your card number and digitally borrow any e-books, dvds, tv show episodes (my library has dr who, so no fretting about hopping between streamers!) from wherever you are on your device. and recently i learned that Hoopla has comic books, including xmen comics, WHICH YOU CAN DOUBLE TAP TO MOVE FROM PANEL TO PANEL INSTEAD OF A FULL PAGE AT A TIME 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 Hoopla and public libraries single handedly resolved some 90% of my comics crisis and finally made one of my greatest and earliest loves fully accessible to me!!!!!!!
however, the problem of chronology remains. i started with a big collection of the uncanny xmen, which id assumed were the first original comics and therefore earliest chronology, but 3-4 stories in i now know im wrong on that front and need yalls help!!!
‼️‼️‼️WHERE DO I START READING X-MEN?? WHAT ORDER DO I READ THEM IN WITH LEAST RISK OF MELTDOWN?? ANY ADVICE IS APPRECIATED‼️‼️‼️
and please dont doubt that i know xmen characters and lore because ive been doing my best to consume everything i can around the barrier of the actual comics and i twas raised on xmen but im so scared this is somehow exposing me as an inferior fan or newbie or something.
new ask game of the modern era
🪓 chops you up with my awesome axe into So many pieces. what dish Do you want to be
🕳️ are you afraid of anything i can do to you
💌 im crushing on you and i cant come off anon but i want you to Feel my affection. no comment necessary but you can respond if you want. idk. sorry.
📣 WHAT ARE YOU THINKING ABOUT RIGHT NOW? HUH? HUH?
📸 send me a random picture from your computer or camera roll or some thing and i'll be yours forever
‼️ increases intensity of previous emoji x10
📀 tell me a story that may or may not be true
😴 basically Whats a dream you remember OK? and the significance ?
🫡 give me orders please miss im on my knees or can get on them
👅 im thinking about your sweat
🔗 i trust you enough that whatever you link or name in your response to this ill play/watch/read it without looking anything up
🌀 brainwashes you brainwashes you brainwashes you brainwashes you
🐣 is this the first baby born in the askbox of a beautiful woman? 🥹
🥹 oh dont mind me im just in love with the beauty of the world. and your joy and whimsy
🥺 PLEASE CALL ME SOMETHING MEAN OR NOT NICE!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!
incredibly bizarre and confusing seeing ppl call themselves "chuds" all the sudden b/c like
thats what we call neo nazis and shitty conservative bros? or at least its what we used to call them? why are ppl calling themselves "chuds" affectionately now
what is happening
yall know chud means fascist right like please tell me yall know that
im hoping this is a case of "younger folks on the internet adopting Silly Word b/c its Silly and not realizing it actually means something"
so here's me educating! you're calling yourselves fascists! thats what you're doing! maybe don't do that and use your head before you start using every goofy word you see!
let me be agonizingly clear
when you call yourself and your friends "chuds"
YOU
ARE
CALLING
YOURSELF
A
NAZI
Wikipedia screenshots for those unwilling or unable to look it up to verify. Article link here(link). Transcriptions are in alt text.
A reminder: "TND" is a Nazi dogwhistle, originating from the phrase "total (n slur) death."
(girl who's been thinking about The Character nonstop for two months voice) you'll never guess what this song reminds me of
literally had a dream last night about my dumbass gunslinger and, within my dream where i was watching omnitiently, went wow you know who this is just like. my dumbass gunslinger.
alexithymia is so strange its like
you know?
its like when you have a tune stuck in your head but cant for the life of you place what it is or where you know it from and you cant confer with anyone else because theres no way to explain or describe it because thats what youre trying to remember. you can name the notes, think of other songs that sounds a little similar to it, ans people go oh is it this other song and you have to say no, thats not at all what it is, but no one can hear what youre hearing and you feel a little insane. that feeling, constantly, your whole life, but with your thoughts and feelings. and no one ever fucking knows what the hell you mean so eventually you just give up trying.