“Toymaker” as a job description in fairy tale fiction is one of my favourite bullshit occupations. “Dollmaker” is fine, “carpenter who makes wooden toys as a side hustle between jobs” is fine, but so many stories have a character whose entire occupation is described as “toymaker” and is heavily implied if not explicitly confirmed to have made all of the toys in their shop, from wood boats to plush animals to porcelain dolls to music boxes to tin soldiers, all made under the tiny hammer of one person.

And it’s not impossible for one person to be at once a highly talented seamstress and tinsmith and carpenter and clockwork engineer and every other talent in the world that would allow you to build everything from china dolls to rocking horses, but to be all that and then single-handedly supply the whole stock of an entire toy store? In a rural whimsical little fairy tale village?? By themselves???

It's disturbing (yet unsurprising) that as restrictions of internet usage and anonymity for children ramp up worldwide, it's crickets over adults making "Content" of their children. It's also wildly upsetting that forcing kids to be more and more within their parents' control is only going to make the latter problem far worse. Hand-wringing over "protecting the children" is such a fucking farce.

ive gotten really into making wax seals over the past few months as a low-wrist-impact creative activity but the problem is that now i have 1 million wax seals. And i do not be writing that many letters

art trend im sick of there is nary a wide neck nor a double chin to be seen in anything these days (COUGH COUGH ESPECIALLY IF ITS A WOMAN)

I got together a group of nerds and we all worked on a Batman movie script. We tried to pitch it to James Gunn and he said no without even looking at it. 

fwiw nothing in the world annoys me as much as people who are expressing a religious worldview but refuse to admit it. "nature designed us for" you mean your god "the cosmic balance will" youre free to believe that but don't make me playact with you "it's objectively good and moral" according to your belief system yes. i however worship a single cthonic glass frog (cochranella euknemos to be precise) who showed up well after humans had evolved and is ambivalent to us at best. xe operates a reincarnation system for our souls completely at random because there was no system when xe arrived here and the disorganisation stressed xem out. xe does have favourite colours and will prejudicially hand out better next lives if you spent your last one increasing the proliferation of those colours in the world, however, we have no idea which colour pleases xem most and as such the only moral way to live is to make everything as polychromatic as possible in increase your chances of delighting the frog. so none of that other stuff applies to me thank you

jerking off is gay because you’re the same gender as yourself

The Ojibwe nailed it. Wawa is exactly the right name for a goose.

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This is The Boy From Venus #5! WOW!!

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Nothing beats the experience of seeing some true tumblr discourse float by and reading like two paragraphs into a post and suddenly realizing “oh wait. I don’t care” and scrolling right past

idk i would personally rather give up access to certain products seasonally or locally than have people enslaved to give me the ability to have any product any place any time. i think i can go without tomatoes in january.

The “bats can do calculus” thing is funny, because if you play around with synths for a while, you realize a lot of what humans perceive as “natural” sounds are just us directly perceiving certain complex mathematical things as big gestalt gestures. Like recognizing a multiplied wave as sounding like a woodwind. Hearing individual notes within a chord is basically Fourier analysis. Feeling how naturally a note decays is perceiving how linear or exponential the curve is. The fact that a sine wave sounds smooth but a sawtooth wave sounds nasally, and a square wave has a certain hollow fuzz to it. Is someone doing “math” there? Once you get the flavor of what each of those qualities are like, listening to the world becomes like directly perceiving math. Also, listening to birds becomes very strange. Because you realize some goofy easy weird sound you can squelch out of an analog synth is the same thing a bird is doing. Then sometimes they make a sound you can’t make. What kind of math is that bird on? Makes you wonder.