these paws are rated e for everyone

1.5M ratings
277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
elodieunderglass
derinthescarletpescatarian

Cozy farming sim but with realistic crop growth times. Just. Just fucking ruin everyone's day with the endless patience required.

derinthescarletpescatarian

And none of this "one crop per year but a year is only 50 days" shit. Full 365 day year. Your guy's gotta eat every day. Actually this would be good in survival sims too. Survival sim where plants and animals (cultivated and noncultivated) replenish at a realistic rate. Work for your food, you stranded fuck.

elodieunderglass

Really make the player question why they’re doing it on a screen at all and not just having a mildly productive outdoor hobby by doing it in real life

alexseanchai
abigail-rytel

Reading articles about MrBeast's dominance of YouTube is fucking bizarre because, from my perspective, the dude isn't even on YouTube. I've never watched one of his videos. YouTube has, to the best of my knowledge, never recommended one of his videos to me. Every thumbnail screenshot of his looks like something you could tell me was a photoshopped parody of YouTube culture, and I'd believe you. No one I follow on YouTube ever mentions him, even negatively or in passing. The first time I ever heard his name was in regards to the quality of his ghost kitchens. The only way I know he isn't a mass, shared hallucination is that I've witnessed the thoroughly mid-looking chocolate bars he sells at Walmart for some reason

abigail-rytel

Given the apparent eleventeen ongoing scandals it feels appropriate to bring this one back

akela-nakamura
ihaveatypeanditstrickstergods

One of my favorite D&D gags that I ever came up with is part of a oneshot I've run a few times where the party is hired by a young wizard to help clear out a few active security measures in a tower that the wizard inherited from her old teacher.

The first obstacle to be cleared is the re-animated skeletons that the old wizard was using for gardening help. It's a pretty straightforward fight, but during the encounter, players may notice one particular raised bed of herbs that is set back in a corner of the garden by itself.

Upon further investigation, this one raised bed is absolutely shining with magical protections. There are runes carved into the wood of the bed, gemstones inlaid in the top of it, this bed is absolutely protected out the ass... and an arcana check shows that the protections are all pointed inward, attempting to keep what's in there from getting out.

What's growing in that raised bed, you may ask? What is so dangerous that the old wizard felt the need to place all these protections?

Mint.

alexseanchai
apod:
“2024 November 5 Milky Way over Easter Island
Credit & Copyright: Josh Dury
Explanation: Why were the statues on Easter Island built? No one is sure. What is sure is that over 900 large stone statues called moais exist there. The Rapa Nui...
apod

2024 November 5

Milky Way over Easter Island
Credit & Copyright: Josh Dury

Explanation: Why were the statues on Easter Island built? No one is sure. What is sure is that over 900 large stone statues called moais exist there. The Rapa Nui (Easter Island) moais stand, on average, over twice as tall as a person and have over 200 times as much mass. It is thought that the unusual statues were created about 600 years ago in the images of local leaders of a vibrant and ancient civilization. Rapa Nui has been declared by UNESCO to a World Heritage Site. Pictured here, some of the stone giants were imaged last month under the central band of our Milky Way galaxy. Previously unknown moais are still being discovered.

∞ Source: apod.nasa.gov/apod/ap241105.html

alexseanchai
vampire-connoisseur

TIP:

This holiday season, if you know someone who likes house plants,

DON'T

get them a houseplant. DO NOT.

instead, get them a NICE, MEDIUM-LARGE, AESTHETIC, BOTTOM-DRAINING, INDOOR

POT.

that is what they want. that is what they dream of. ok? thats what will be most useful and appreciated. in fact, if you can, get them a CUTE MATCHING SET. OF POTS!!!! NOT PLANTS, POTS!!!!!!!!

they may be more excited initially about the plant. that is true. but a pot is a gift that they will go home and use to upsize one of their already beloved houseplants, and every time they look at it they will remember how much they appreciate you.

HOUSEPLANT:

- they already have so many

- needs to be watered

- takes up window space

- comes in a pot thats already too small, needs to be upsized, costing money

- can die

AESTHETIC POT

- lets them care for an existing plant they own

- they will be grateful every time they see it in their home

- does not take up window space not already occupied by a plant

- can be wrapped without dying or spilling dirt everywhere

ms-demeanor

- does not need to be quarantined/cannot bring in pests that will threaten their current plants

alexseanchai
oleander-teacup

image

and with your help it can rack up 700k notes on tumblr in 2024


no tumblr this doesnt need tags im releasing it into the wild as god intended

magic-and-moonlit-wings

[tweet from Zizou [red dice emoji] Wishlist GIMMIKO!]

Watching kitchen nightmares when I'm suddenly met with a screencap that would've racked up 700k notes on tumblr in 2014

[embedded photo of the screencap in question - a yellow dog stands in the foreground, the background is blurred, and the text "Executive Producer KENT WEED" is on the lower part of the screen, overlapping the dog's forelegs and implying this is the dog's name.]

[/end tweet]