Reblogged
i just really wanted to draw a wizard i don’t know what to tell you
Reblogged bafflednpc
So thinking of my AU with LBH pretending to be SQH (Link here) only Moshang.
LBH after returning from abyss decides to bridenap/steal away SQQ. Only he needs to make sure no one notices so decides he's going to use artifact to glamor MBJ to pretend to be SQQ.
LBH: It's fine just stay in the bamboo house and hide behind a fan and look annoyed at everyone they'll think he's maybe qi deviated back to whoever he was before... maybe it'll stop LQG hanging around.
MBJ isn't happy but LBH isn't giving him much choice, he just tells SQH he's pout on a mission and to take care of the North.
MBJ is sitting around sulking in this boring house and annoyed cause he wanted to spend time with Qinghua... only for SQH to walk in calling him 'bro' and MBJ is mad at how close SQH is to SQQ until SQH instantly starts talking about his king.
MBJ just sitting face blank as Qinghua gushes about him, how handsome his king, and how much of a brat he is leaving him to do all the work while out a mission he's lucky he's handsome enough to get away with it ect ect. Qinghua is equal parts complaining and praising him.
Apparently not realizing he's been courting him??
It isn't until SQH gets a good look at SQQ without fan and.... that isn't his bro's bitchy look... Oh gods he knows that bitchy look....
Bonus: MBJ calls in a favor from SHL and now she's stuck pretending to be SQQ while MBJ bridenaps his human.
Reblogged mega-phauna
shen jiu with weird arms for my friend 🥰
i'm getting the sense some of you are not actually forklift certified.
well damn . egg on my face
THE PLOT THICKENS @averagejoey2000 explain yourself
I can't believe this is how I'm finding out that I got a scam forklift cert.
I took the cargo ops class at school but my teacher explained that it doesn't give a certification and I'd only be okay for ship's crane and the school forklifts. she said I could take an online exam and get my cert. I paid 60 bucks.
I'm googling and I'm seeing a lot of resources saying that the online programs cover the classroom part of the exam but not the in person practical aspect.
29 CFR 1910.178 (l)(2)(ii)
but I did the in person practical shit at school.
the back of the card even had fancy numbers on it. I couldn't have known that this isn't the one. this website sounded more official than certifyme.net, and there wasn't one with a .gov address.
so, I emailed OSHA, and they said that so long as I live and work in California, there's no such thing as forklift certification. I have to be told how to do it every time I get the job.
Update: I took a certification class in shipboard Material Handling Equipment at my federal job. *now* I'm forklift certified, but only on ships and piers and only for this company, but also rated to forklift explosives and hazardous materials. Also I'm a woman now.
Reblogged dick-hardboiled
tenmillionpoundsofsludge-deacti
I hate when I drink all of my drink and there's no drink left. What the fuckkkkkkk. #sickandtwisted
Reblogged
Moshang AU/fic prompt where either due to his uncles schemes and plot deviations MBJ loses power or when LBH comes back he completely takes over North and ousts MBJ and fully takes over.
MBJ ends up on An Ding with SQH and staying there full time.
SQH finding artifact that allows MBJ to pass as human since he'll be here for extended stay and probably won't stay in house the whole time. Plus he can put it back for protagonist to find artifact his is done.
MBJ ends up on peak and all the disciples see 2 together and OH that must be Shizun's husband/wife... I thought they were a demon oh well.
Him spending months with SQH and spending time with him and not having to fight able to actually relax just being with Qinghua.
SQH also finding lots of weapons and treasures and books for his king, he must be hating being stuck here and having to rely on him for everything. MBJ is loving it
MBJ loves being Qinghua's doted upon wife just lounging around and watching Qinghua run his peak listening to him insult and complain about his fellow peak lords.
He is getting rid of or vetoing all SQH plans to get North back.
LBH finding out about SQH's new mystery spouse and....is that MBJ? He's suddenly throwing all plans out and interrogating MBJ HOW? How did you get to be a peak lords wife? TELL ME EVERYTHING!
Bonus: LGJ in North hating this, how is there so much paperwork? Who was doing this before?Fuck he's going to call off the attempts on MBJs life he wants his nephew to move home so his nephew in law will do all this bureaucracy PLEASE.
Reblogged dick-hardboiled
in the pale moonlight I stand lone and bloodied. I look sick as fuck and you wish you were me
Reblogged pangur-and-grim
Things that actually happen in hunchback of notre dame, in no particular order
- The book mostly is told from the POV of Pierre, a self-insert who is failed author and, I cannot stress this enough, utterly pathetic
- Quasimodo damaged his hearing as a teenager from years of bell ringing and now uses sign language whenever he can
- There is a scene where Quasimodo and a fellow deaf guy have to have a conversation without using sign language because they’re in a courtroom and the jury doesn’t know sign. It goes about as well as you’d expect
- Frollo has a little brother, Jehan, who he raised after their parents died. Jehan is now a frat bro in college whose hobbies consist of getting drunk and being mean to Quasimodo. In his first scene Jehan complains about college DEI because an Italian guy got a scholarship he wanted.
- Esmeralda is accused of witchcraft because she taught her pet goat Djali how to do math
- Djali may or may not be sapient. He can and does imitate human mannerisms to make fun of people on purpose. He does this while on trial.
- Yes. They tried the goat for witchcraft, too.
- Pierre writes a whole play riding on the pun of dolphin/Dauphin. Nobody likes it.
- Frollo is an alchemist and has a secret mad science lab where he writes on the walls
- Jehan literally pulls a “buy my silence” and frollo gives him money to make him shut up
- There’s a trio of catty girls who bully Esmeralda like it’s Mean Girls
- Quasimodo and Frollo literally have Cryptid Status— Parisians circulate rumors that Quasimodo is either a familiar, a homunculus, or the result of demonic mpreg, and that Frollo is a wizard with wizard powers and/or a ghost
- There is a little old woman who lives in a hole and shouts slurs at people. She has a tragic backstory.
- There is a homicidal con man/king of thieves named Clopin Troillefou (surname translation: The Fool of Fear) who deserves tumblr sexymanhood.
- Pierre learns how to carry chairs with his teeth
- There’s an entire chapter dedicated to the layout of the streets of Paris in painstaking detail
- There’s another chapter that is a rant about interior design
- Esmeralda and Pierre get platonically married due to Clopin’s murderous shenanigans. Pierre tries to make a move in her but ends up being more emotionally attached to Djali the goat than to her. I think that should be grounds for divorce
- There is a scene where Pierre has to choose between helping Esmeralda escape or helping Djali. He picks Djali.
- Frollo hides from his own brother by laying face down in mud and playing dead. Somehow this works
- There is a Plot Significant Tiny Shoe. A Tiny Shoe Chekhov’s Gun. And Victor Hugo will not stop telling you just how Tiny this shoe is.
- There’s a soap opera style plot twist that involves a false accusation of cannibalism and the woman in the hole who shouts slurs
- Quasimodo makes up a stupid little song that doesn’t even rhyme to confess his love to Esmeralda, who remains oblivious
- He then attempts to demonstrate his affection via convoluted metaphors that involve props. She doesn’t get it. Boy please say what you mean
- Frollo pulls the classic discord groomer tactic of threatening self-harm if Esmeralda doesn’t give in.
- Jehan rolls up to a party/rescue mission scheming session in Clopin’s secret hideout in full plate armor (how did he get that???), drunk off his ass, and acts like he owns the place. Everyone finds this so ridiculous that they just let him
- Hugo goes on and on about how innocent and naive Esmeralda is but then casually reveals that Esmeralda carries a dagger on her person at all times to fend off assault. When Frollo attacks her and Quasi intervenes, she takes Quasi’s knife and almost kills Frollo (fair!) but he flees. She contains multitudes?
- Frollo has a psychotic breakdown in the middle of a field surrounded by chickens and hallucinates skeletons everywhere
- For the first half of the book Esmeralda is like 70% sure Frollo is a ghost, not helped by his aforementioned Cryptid Status
- Jehan eats a moldy piece of cheese off the ground
- Frollo tries to send Pierre on a suicide mission in drag. Pierre objects to the suicide part but not the drag part
- Clopin’s preferred weapon is a scythe, he’s very good at using it, and he sings when he fights. Again: sexyman potential.
- Victor Hugo has a foot fetish. I initially dismissed it as Frollo having a foot fetish until Victor Hugo included a foot fetish torture scene without any Frollo in it. So I can only conclude that the foot fetish is authorial in nature. Unfortunately the foot scenes are important to the plot.
- Frollo is canonically 36, he just aged like shit and is bald. The narrator will not stop telling you just how bald he is.
- Despite being in full plate armor, Jehan gets splatted like a bug
- Almost every named character dies. Djali the goat lives.
Reblogged
[ENG] Mo Dao Zu Shi second stage play - subtitle file
Good time of day to you all!
The subtitle file for the second MDZS stage play is finally here! I'm thrilled to announce that this time, the subtitles are a collaboration with the lovely Peony, who reached out to me and was kind enough to send me the Yi City arc subs she had previously done for personal use. Many many thanks to Peony, they've been super lovely to talk to and collab with!
Subtitles for the first MDZS stage play can be found here.
Disclaimers and subtitle file for the second one can be found after the cut.
Thank you!
Reblogged horsegirlwarcrimes
Impressionable mind 🥄🐇 (2020)