S.U.
Something I worked on (then abandoned, but want to get back to) for a comic universe community my Internet buddies and I used to have. I'll explain more later.
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Wrestlemania 25
I have not finished my review of WM24 yet (Thanks for sending me things out-of-order, Netflix), so here is my premature review of 25.
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Wrestlemania 23
Wrestlemania 22
Posting a few things I have written recently. Hoping it inspires me to do more of it
The next few things are going to be Wrestlemania reviews I was doing for a wrestling website I frequent. Another guy had reviewed the first 21, but then just quit, so I picked up the ball and am finishing up the last few.
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The next few things are going to be Wrestlemania reviews I was doing for a wrestling website I frequent. Another guy had reviewed the first 21, but then just quit, so I picked up the ball and am finishing up the last few.
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(no subject)
I haven't checked into LJ for months (Depressionville), so imagine my surprise when I came to the Update page and it asked me if I wanted to restore a draft. Why, of course I do! What could I possibly have been writing last, and why did I walk away from it? Was it something important? Stunning? Embarrassing? Funny? Well, here is my restored draft, in its entirety:
"A few weeks ago, "
So...that was my letdown for the morning.
I have not updated my Journal here in 23 weeks, and that is, quite frankly, unacceptable. It is so sad for me to see all of my Ace Attorney icons that I worked so hard to acquire listed as "Inactive". I almost want to pay for LJ just for access to them again in case I do use it more often.
Oh, I like the way the Tags work now, opening up that drag-down menu. Very nice.
Anyway, I suppose the biggest news here is that I have been engaged for about 2-and-a-half weeks now. I proposed to Amanda three Mondays ago. It's weird--A few minutes before I did it, I got really nervous. Why is that weird? She knew it was coming; she even knew that I had a ring in my possession. Must just be natural to get nervous right before doing it.
Also, I got a job offer yesterday, so that's pretty sweet. I'm keeping it pretty hush-hush at the moment from my job, but I think I'm going to try to stay on there part-time so I can save up some spare money for the wedding. We are looking to having a destination wedding in the Bahamas! Neither of us want to have a huge wedding; she has a lot of friends and family that she doesn't necessarily all want to be there, and I don't have more than 3 dozen people I'd even bother inviting. So...Bahamas wedding, with maybe just 20-30 total guests. We figure by the time you get done feeding and getting drinks to well over 100 people, you're spending almost as much as you would traveling. But we shall see.
Anyway, my job offer is for a Caseworker position. It's not my dream or anything, but it's a full-time, mostly steady hours, and is pretty important. It will give me a glorious sense of self-righteousness. Huzzah!
Nothing much else for now, but hopefully I will be back soon. Within 23 weeks, at least.
"A few weeks ago, "
So...that was my letdown for the morning.
I have not updated my Journal here in 23 weeks, and that is, quite frankly, unacceptable. It is so sad for me to see all of my Ace Attorney icons that I worked so hard to acquire listed as "Inactive". I almost want to pay for LJ just for access to them again in case I do use it more often.
Oh, I like the way the Tags work now, opening up that drag-down menu. Very nice.
Anyway, I suppose the biggest news here is that I have been engaged for about 2-and-a-half weeks now. I proposed to Amanda three Mondays ago. It's weird--A few minutes before I did it, I got really nervous. Why is that weird? She knew it was coming; she even knew that I had a ring in my possession. Must just be natural to get nervous right before doing it.
Also, I got a job offer yesterday, so that's pretty sweet. I'm keeping it pretty hush-hush at the moment from my job, but I think I'm going to try to stay on there part-time so I can save up some spare money for the wedding. We are looking to having a destination wedding in the Bahamas! Neither of us want to have a huge wedding; she has a lot of friends and family that she doesn't necessarily all want to be there, and I don't have more than 3 dozen people I'd even bother inviting. So...Bahamas wedding, with maybe just 20-30 total guests. We figure by the time you get done feeding and getting drinks to well over 100 people, you're spending almost as much as you would traveling. But we shall see.
Anyway, my job offer is for a Caseworker position. It's not my dream or anything, but it's a full-time, mostly steady hours, and is pretty important. It will give me a glorious sense of self-righteousness. Huzzah!
Nothing much else for now, but hopefully I will be back soon. Within 23 weeks, at least.
In which I am watching soccer.
After weeks of bitching about soccer, I'm actually watching my first game of the World Cup: Spain vs Portugal.
Now, I've spent a lot of time LOLing about soccer and how wussy and glacially-paced it is, as well as how I've been sick of the media trying to convince us that we should care when we clearly don't. I know not one person who has watched a single minute of the World Cup--not a friend, co-worker, nor family member. So the media really needs to STFU and quit acting like it is relevant at all.
But due to how nothing else is on TV, and the game only had 20 minutes left, I turned on Spain/Portugal to kill time, and you know what?
I WAS SO FRICKING RIGHT I CAN'T EVEN STAND IT.
Who watches this game? Seriously? Who on Earth could POSSIBLY ever enjoy this? For starters, I have to have my bloody TV on mute because EVERYTHING I'VE HEARD ABOUT THE VUVUZELAS IS 100% RIGHT. They never end! And they're obnoxious! It's like an entire soccer game taking place while Gonzo from the Muppets blows his nose.
Past that....it's just MINUTES UPON MINUTES of the two teams middling about at mid-field. The field is 6 years long! Why not change the rules so each team doesn't get to play 74 guys at a time so they can take advantage of all that space. Portugal (I think....whoever is wearing red, anyway. IF I COULD TURN MY VOLUME ON, I MIGHT KNOW) spent upwards 4 straight minutes passing back-and-forth at the center line. The only time I've seen the ball leave the middle of the field has been one of the many times a player just kicked it REALLY HARD and it harmlessly rolled out of bounds because there was no one in the vicinity. Then someone throws it back in, and we go right back to middling around for a while.
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? The game just ended at, like, the 93:08 mark. WHAT THE HELL KIND OF TIME IS THAT? "How long is your game?" "Oh, we play all-out for ninety three minutes and eight seconds." "...." What sense does that make?
You know...in the entire time I watched, I don't think I saw a single shot on the goal. Why don't the goalies just get muscle cramps sitting on their hands all day? Then again, I think they do. Every time I've seen goalies in the World Cup highlights, they've either been botching a save and letting the ball roll into the net, or they've been diving in the COMPLETE OPPOSITE DIRECTION of a kick. I have a firm belief that soccer goalies are not actually athletes, but are, instead, the team owner's lazy nephew who can't hold down a real job. "Hey, bro. I know you've got this team to manage, but my kid Jeremy really needs a job." "Can he stand uselessly in front of a space roughly the size of the space station?" "Why yes. Yes he can."
The final score was 1-0, making in indistinguishable from ANY OTHER SOCCER GAME ANYWHERE EVER.
I never thought I'd find a sport that makes baseball look action-packed, but man. World Cup! Where the action never stops! If by "action", I mean "endlessly circling about the middle of the field, while occasionally falling down in temporary dire pain if someone in another color jersey comes within 3 feet of you".
Now, I've spent a lot of time LOLing about soccer and how wussy and glacially-paced it is, as well as how I've been sick of the media trying to convince us that we should care when we clearly don't. I know not one person who has watched a single minute of the World Cup--not a friend, co-worker, nor family member. So the media really needs to STFU and quit acting like it is relevant at all.
But due to how nothing else is on TV, and the game only had 20 minutes left, I turned on Spain/Portugal to kill time, and you know what?
I WAS SO FRICKING RIGHT I CAN'T EVEN STAND IT.
Who watches this game? Seriously? Who on Earth could POSSIBLY ever enjoy this? For starters, I have to have my bloody TV on mute because EVERYTHING I'VE HEARD ABOUT THE VUVUZELAS IS 100% RIGHT. They never end! And they're obnoxious! It's like an entire soccer game taking place while Gonzo from the Muppets blows his nose.
Past that....it's just MINUTES UPON MINUTES of the two teams middling about at mid-field. The field is 6 years long! Why not change the rules so each team doesn't get to play 74 guys at a time so they can take advantage of all that space. Portugal (I think....whoever is wearing red, anyway. IF I COULD TURN MY VOLUME ON, I MIGHT KNOW) spent upwards 4 straight minutes passing back-and-forth at the center line. The only time I've seen the ball leave the middle of the field has been one of the many times a player just kicked it REALLY HARD and it harmlessly rolled out of bounds because there was no one in the vicinity. Then someone throws it back in, and we go right back to middling around for a while.
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? The game just ended at, like, the 93:08 mark. WHAT THE HELL KIND OF TIME IS THAT? "How long is your game?" "Oh, we play all-out for ninety three minutes and eight seconds." "...." What sense does that make?
You know...in the entire time I watched, I don't think I saw a single shot on the goal. Why don't the goalies just get muscle cramps sitting on their hands all day? Then again, I think they do. Every time I've seen goalies in the World Cup highlights, they've either been botching a save and letting the ball roll into the net, or they've been diving in the COMPLETE OPPOSITE DIRECTION of a kick. I have a firm belief that soccer goalies are not actually athletes, but are, instead, the team owner's lazy nephew who can't hold down a real job. "Hey, bro. I know you've got this team to manage, but my kid Jeremy really needs a job." "Can he stand uselessly in front of a space roughly the size of the space station?" "Why yes. Yes he can."
The final score was 1-0, making in indistinguishable from ANY OTHER SOCCER GAME ANYWHERE EVER.
I never thought I'd find a sport that makes baseball look action-packed, but man. World Cup! Where the action never stops! If by "action", I mean "endlessly circling about the middle of the field, while occasionally falling down in temporary dire pain if someone in another color jersey comes within 3 feet of you".
In which I catch up!
It's been a long, long time.
Recent months have seen me meet a snazzy girl named Amanda, to the point where I am writing this from her living room because...we have moved in together. We've been seeing each other since last September, and around March of this year (obviously...that's king of a redundant tack on. If we started seeing each other in September, and it is currently June, there is not exactly a plethora of options for what year "March" could allude to. But, for the sake of absolute transparency, I add in "of this year". Clearly because I am expecting to get paid by the word for this journal experience, even though I am not getting paid at all. Free blogging for you top enjoy!, I say, as if expecting that anyone will even read this) she began asking me to move in. It has been a really slow process where I am essentially moving a few small carry-able items every time I go back home, but...it has been happening. I have a room! With a closet! Full of my clothes! So...that's, like, "belonging", yes? "Living here", as it were?
Amanda herself is a special girl; we have good times together and laugh constantly. We never find ourselves wanting for conversation when we go out to dinner, and we enjoy the company of each other. I am...not a very good gusher, it seems. Suffice to say, happiness abounds when we are together, and it is, as the hip kids say, all good.
She does, I find, have infinite patience for my geekiness; she has come with me to the Pittsburgh Comic Con and a Yugioh sneak peak event, without much complaining (well...moreso in the case of the Comic Con; she really did not love the Yugioh event that much, but I digress), and that's obviously a plus.
I am trying to find what else might be considered "news". I feel it would be awkward if--after all this time of ignoring LiveJournal--I were to come back and start editorializing or anecdote-izing away. I still work, and eat, and sleep. My life feel much unchanged; only now, I do more of it in a new apartment, and with a new person. I constantly feel as though my LiveJournal is some facet of a person I no longer quite am, and I am having a difficult time assimilating it into the new "me". I feel as though I do not "require" LiveJournal anymore as I once maybe did, if that makes sense. Not that LJ was some kind of emotional crutch, but I found it quite comforting to come here and meander on about my nonsense thoughts and feelings to people--only a few of whom did I know in the "real" world (I do quite love quotation marks, apparently; everything is said in a kind of disaffected way now. "News" and "require" and "real". I can't quite imagine any reason why that might be). Time was, I very much enjoyed sharing random thoughts and "feelings" (there it is again!) with others while simultaneously reading their own, but now I feel less...sharey. Which is weird, because I am quite an attention whore.
I have periodically considered abandoning this LiveJournal in the quest to start another, but I have had this since 2002 or so, and it would almost break my heart to "ditch" my former self. But I feel as though the LJ bar I set in 2007-2009 is just too high. I was too attentive and too witty and too amusing, and I feel like it is a terrible burden to live up to the amazing standards I have previously set. Clearly, modesty does not become me, but don't worry...I'm mostly being facetious.
You know...when I STARTED this, I was saying to myself "I am only going to talk about me and my life goings-on. I am not going to talk about my lack of LJ-ing". I am...not very good at this game. Heh.
Recent months have seen me meet a snazzy girl named Amanda, to the point where I am writing this from her living room because...we have moved in together. We've been seeing each other since last September, and around March of this year (obviously...that's king of a redundant tack on. If we started seeing each other in September, and it is currently June, there is not exactly a plethora of options for what year "March" could allude to. But, for the sake of absolute transparency, I add in "of this year". Clearly because I am expecting to get paid by the word for this journal experience, even though I am not getting paid at all. Free blogging for you top enjoy!, I say, as if expecting that anyone will even read this) she began asking me to move in. It has been a really slow process where I am essentially moving a few small carry-able items every time I go back home, but...it has been happening. I have a room! With a closet! Full of my clothes! So...that's, like, "belonging", yes? "Living here", as it were?
Amanda herself is a special girl; we have good times together and laugh constantly. We never find ourselves wanting for conversation when we go out to dinner, and we enjoy the company of each other. I am...not a very good gusher, it seems. Suffice to say, happiness abounds when we are together, and it is, as the hip kids say, all good.
She does, I find, have infinite patience for my geekiness; she has come with me to the Pittsburgh Comic Con and a Yugioh sneak peak event, without much complaining (well...moreso in the case of the Comic Con; she really did not love the Yugioh event that much, but I digress), and that's obviously a plus.
I am trying to find what else might be considered "news". I feel it would be awkward if--after all this time of ignoring LiveJournal--I were to come back and start editorializing or anecdote-izing away. I still work, and eat, and sleep. My life feel much unchanged; only now, I do more of it in a new apartment, and with a new person. I constantly feel as though my LiveJournal is some facet of a person I no longer quite am, and I am having a difficult time assimilating it into the new "me". I feel as though I do not "require" LiveJournal anymore as I once maybe did, if that makes sense. Not that LJ was some kind of emotional crutch, but I found it quite comforting to come here and meander on about my nonsense thoughts and feelings to people--only a few of whom did I know in the "real" world (I do quite love quotation marks, apparently; everything is said in a kind of disaffected way now. "News" and "require" and "real". I can't quite imagine any reason why that might be). Time was, I very much enjoyed sharing random thoughts and "feelings" (there it is again!) with others while simultaneously reading their own, but now I feel less...sharey. Which is weird, because I am quite an attention whore.
I have periodically considered abandoning this LiveJournal in the quest to start another, but I have had this since 2002 or so, and it would almost break my heart to "ditch" my former self. But I feel as though the LJ bar I set in 2007-2009 is just too high. I was too attentive and too witty and too amusing, and I feel like it is a terrible burden to live up to the amazing standards I have previously set. Clearly, modesty does not become me, but don't worry...I'm mostly being facetious.
You know...when I STARTED this, I was saying to myself "I am only going to talk about me and my life goings-on. I am not going to talk about my lack of LJ-ing". I am...not very good at this game. Heh.
Oh my god.
This is what LJ Plus is like now? I log in, go to look at something, and get this giant video ad that takes up my whole screen and says "HEY WATCH THIS AND YOU CAN LJ WHEN IT'S OVER, COOL?"
Weak. Sauce.
There wasn't even any way I could NOT watch it. I was stuck with some stupid Boxing On Showtime commercial for 30 seconds.
Weak. Sauce.
There wasn't even any way I could NOT watch it. I was stuck with some stupid Boxing On Showtime commercial for 30 seconds.
In which I am older but less mature? Or more. Or somewhere in-between.
I'm really curious about the guy who first discovered honey.
This is a real thing.
I don't know who it was.
Or if it even was a guy.
But I was looking at a book on bee-keeping earlier today, and I just started thinking: What kind of person was the first guy who looked at a beehive and thought "You know what? I want to get in there".
Seems like poor decision-making skills to me. But everything has a beginning. At some point in time, there totally had to be a guy who decided he just had to know what was going on inside of a bee hive. And, truly, bless his soul. Because his fortitude increased the delectability of graham crackers exponentially. But still...masochism. That's all I'm saying.
My LiveJournal is going to auto-renew in, like, 3 days for another year of subscription, and...I'm not entirely sure I want it to. I'm sure I can find a way to put a stop to this, but even that is vaguely sad. I'll really, deeply miss my Phoenix icons if I let my subscription lapse, but that's no matter because I still have all the links to where I got them.
But, I think, what I'd miss most is the significance of the act. Everyone knows I have LJ'ed substantially less for the past few months; no great mystery there. But letting my subscription lapse just puts this solid, meaningful stamp on how much less attention I pay to it.
It's not even like a....real thing. I have had LiveJournal since 2002, but I only REALLY paid huge amounts of attention to it from about the end of 2007 to the beginning of 2009. That's a small percent of the time that I owned it, but damn if I didn't absolutely adore LJ in that window. I was writing a jillion times a week. Why don't I anymore? Have I really lost the ability to spout inane shit like I always did? I dunno.
I am still waffling on whether or not to put a stop to the auto-renew. DILEMMA. I have some ideas. WHO KNOWS?
I have been re-reading Trinity's LJ a lot the past few days. Seems odd to me that she and I have been friends again for FOUR YEARS NOW. That is an incredibly long time, given what our relationship as two human beings had been up until that point. I read her LJ; I can't really read old entries of mine (except for ones written during the aforementioned 2007-2009 time frame when, really, my LiveJournal was one of the best unknown things on the web. I'M JUST SAYING). I'm really proud of Trinity, and that feels really gay to declare aloud, but...she's a terribly wonderful person. She has a kid and functioning life and everything; it's pretty wild.
My LiveJournal, though, does have a lot of history. A lot of DRAMA. Drama llama. I used to be such a magnet for that kind of stuff; so odd now when I am much more passive. Drama here. Drama on other journals. Drama on communities. Drama used to abound. I'm so much less of a jerk now. Or I'm not. You know, whichever.
Hm. Hmmmmmm. Seriously, though. That bee hive thing. Damn.
This is a real thing.
I don't know who it was.
Or if it even was a guy.
But I was looking at a book on bee-keeping earlier today, and I just started thinking: What kind of person was the first guy who looked at a beehive and thought "You know what? I want to get in there".
Seems like poor decision-making skills to me. But everything has a beginning. At some point in time, there totally had to be a guy who decided he just had to know what was going on inside of a bee hive. And, truly, bless his soul. Because his fortitude increased the delectability of graham crackers exponentially. But still...masochism. That's all I'm saying.
My LiveJournal is going to auto-renew in, like, 3 days for another year of subscription, and...I'm not entirely sure I want it to. I'm sure I can find a way to put a stop to this, but even that is vaguely sad. I'll really, deeply miss my Phoenix icons if I let my subscription lapse, but that's no matter because I still have all the links to where I got them.
But, I think, what I'd miss most is the significance of the act. Everyone knows I have LJ'ed substantially less for the past few months; no great mystery there. But letting my subscription lapse just puts this solid, meaningful stamp on how much less attention I pay to it.
It's not even like a....real thing. I have had LiveJournal since 2002, but I only REALLY paid huge amounts of attention to it from about the end of 2007 to the beginning of 2009. That's a small percent of the time that I owned it, but damn if I didn't absolutely adore LJ in that window. I was writing a jillion times a week. Why don't I anymore? Have I really lost the ability to spout inane shit like I always did? I dunno.
I am still waffling on whether or not to put a stop to the auto-renew. DILEMMA. I have some ideas. WHO KNOWS?
I have been re-reading Trinity's LJ a lot the past few days. Seems odd to me that she and I have been friends again for FOUR YEARS NOW. That is an incredibly long time, given what our relationship as two human beings had been up until that point. I read her LJ; I can't really read old entries of mine (except for ones written during the aforementioned 2007-2009 time frame when, really, my LiveJournal was one of the best unknown things on the web. I'M JUST SAYING). I'm really proud of Trinity, and that feels really gay to declare aloud, but...she's a terribly wonderful person. She has a kid and functioning life and everything; it's pretty wild.
My LiveJournal, though, does have a lot of history. A lot of DRAMA. Drama llama. I used to be such a magnet for that kind of stuff; so odd now when I am much more passive. Drama here. Drama on other journals. Drama on communities. Drama used to abound. I'm so much less of a jerk now. Or I'm not. You know, whichever.
Hm. Hmmmmmm. Seriously, though. That bee hive thing. Damn.
In which I hate my bank[s] so hard.
Let me explain to you my latest frustration.
Back last year when all the banks in America were all ZOMG TEH WURLD IZ ENDIGN!, two local Pittsburgh banks merged, or bought one another out or SOME SUCH. It actually led my dad to close his bank account because he was suddenly terrified the banks would all close, and he'd never see his $300 or whatever he had in his account again. It's somewhat frustrating because NOW I have to go cash his checks for him. Whatevs.
Anyway, I had both my checking account and my car loan account with Bank A, which was, in turn, bought out during the HUGE EPIC SUPER FAIL FINANCIAL CRISIS by Bank B. Over the course of the last few months, I got some notifications in the mail, including new check cards. Lovely. Everything was still gravy, however, and the official changeover did not kick in until 11-09-09.
November 9th came and went, and aside from having a new orange check card, my life changed not all. I registered with Bank B's website and loaded my account up and everything was working just fine (although, that took a MILD amount of doing because Bank A's website was supposed to AUTOMATICALLY kick me over to Bank B and help me set up my account, and it did not because they are terrible. I figured it out enough to do it myself. BFD).
Until the end of November when I tried to pay on my Installment loan.
If I logged in under my account at Bank A, I could see my loan on my car. And if I tried to pay it, it would tell me I couldn't, because I did not have an account. My checking account as at $0 and was no longer active. Well, that's right. It became part of Bank B.
So I would log in under Bank B to find...no installment loan at all. Not listed anywhere. I headed out to the bank and asked what was going on. After several minutes of messing around on his computer, the teller told me that he could SEE my loan account, but could not DO anything to it because it still belonged to Bank A, and he was now Bank B. There were now no more Bank A's in Pennsylvania. But! No matter! I could go home and set up and online bill pay to have my account take care of the payment.
So I did. I went home and I found all the info and all the account numbers I needed, and I set up an online Bill Pay from Bank B to my installment loan at Bank B (Bee Tee Dubs...don't you love how cryptic I'm being, like someone out there who hasn't de-friended me here yet is going to STEAL MY IDENTITY if I give away the simple NAMES OF MY BANKS. Online carefulness is usually not my style, but this is bank shit, yo). All settled.
Until 4 days later, when I came home from work and checked my mail.
Whereupon I had a check.
From me.
To me.
For my car loan.
Bank B's online bill pay SENT ME A CHECK FROM MY OWN ACCOUNT as a way of "paying" my installment loan.
(To be fair [fair-ish], the check was made out to Bank A Installment Loans Account [Number]. At my address. Because, CLEARLY, I AM A BANK)
So I took this check to Bank B and asked WTF it was.
The teller lady had no idea.
Her manager had no idea.
No idea why it was sent to me, or why a check had even been cut in the first place instead of a simple account credit. But there it was, plain as day. We all had a good laugh about the silliness of it all, and Bank B--still incapable of paying a loan they DID NOT inherit from Bank A with my checking account that they DID--told me to call Bank A and set up a payment by phone.
I called Bank A and explain the situation to them. Here is my mental recollection of what happened:
Lady: Hi, this is Unmemorable Name for Bank A. How may I fuck you in your colon today?
Me: Hi, yes, allow me to explain this whole situation to you.
Lady: Oh, that fills me with phony sympathy. Let's set up a pay-by-phone for you.
Me: Yes, let's.
Lady: There will be a $15 Western Union fee for paying by phone.
Me: ..............Yeah, but there won't.
Lady: Well, if you want to avoid the fee, you can pay by mail by sending in a check.
Me: I don't....I don't OWN checks. I haven't had a check in two years. I pay everything online. EXCEPT THIS ALL OF THE SUDDEN.
Lady: Well then you will have to pay the $15 fee.
Me: *hangs up*
The next day, I decided to try back. I called Bank A again and started into my spiel, whereupon Unhelpful Phone Man placed me "on hold" which was ACTUALLY transferring me to the automated Pay By Phone menu WHICH WANTED TO CHARGE ME A $15 FEE. I hung up AGAIN.
So I called back Monday night, and spoke to a MUCH MORE HELPFUL representative, who transferred me to his supervisor. They both agreed I should NOT be charged a fee for something I used to do for FREE until these two banks decided to split my accounts like Solomon splits babies. Here is the NEXT mental transcript:
Supervisor: Let's set up this fee-free payment for you. What are your Bank B account and routing numbers?
Me: I don't know that. I am in my car. I have my check card to read to you (I WAS PARKED, I WAS PARKED; don't give me any crap for this).
Supervisor: We need your account numbers; we can't use your card.
Me: OH MY GOD.
Supervisor: Call us back when you get the numbers!
SO. I called back Tuesday night. AT 6:30. THIS IS HIGHLY RELEVANT. And I spoke to a girl whom was filled with very realistic phony sympathy. And told me that she would be happy to take my payment sans fee, but she'd have to transfer me to the lending department, WHICH CLOSED AT 6:00PM SO PLEASE CALL BACK TOMORROW.
Believe it or not, I did--DID!--finally get everything taken care of yesterday. I called, talked to a person, and got transferred to the lending department. I didn't even mention the $15 fee, and neither did they, so if they charged me for it, I have no idea. And by this point, I didn't even WANT to bring up the daily late fee of x-amount of cents per day I had been accruing since the last week of November. Who cares? I paid off my car--I only had THREE MORE PAYMENTS TO GO when all this started--so hopefully, I will be done with them forever. You can bet I am keeping the confirmation number the very last person gave me.......I don't trust these people to do ANYTHING right.
Back last year when all the banks in America were all ZOMG TEH WURLD IZ ENDIGN!, two local Pittsburgh banks merged, or bought one another out or SOME SUCH. It actually led my dad to close his bank account because he was suddenly terrified the banks would all close, and he'd never see his $300 or whatever he had in his account again. It's somewhat frustrating because NOW I have to go cash his checks for him. Whatevs.
Anyway, I had both my checking account and my car loan account with Bank A, which was, in turn, bought out during the HUGE EPIC SUPER FAIL FINANCIAL CRISIS by Bank B. Over the course of the last few months, I got some notifications in the mail, including new check cards. Lovely. Everything was still gravy, however, and the official changeover did not kick in until 11-09-09.
November 9th came and went, and aside from having a new orange check card, my life changed not all. I registered with Bank B's website and loaded my account up and everything was working just fine (although, that took a MILD amount of doing because Bank A's website was supposed to AUTOMATICALLY kick me over to Bank B and help me set up my account, and it did not because they are terrible. I figured it out enough to do it myself. BFD).
Until the end of November when I tried to pay on my Installment loan.
If I logged in under my account at Bank A, I could see my loan on my car. And if I tried to pay it, it would tell me I couldn't, because I did not have an account. My checking account as at $0 and was no longer active. Well, that's right. It became part of Bank B.
So I would log in under Bank B to find...no installment loan at all. Not listed anywhere. I headed out to the bank and asked what was going on. After several minutes of messing around on his computer, the teller told me that he could SEE my loan account, but could not DO anything to it because it still belonged to Bank A, and he was now Bank B. There were now no more Bank A's in Pennsylvania. But! No matter! I could go home and set up and online bill pay to have my account take care of the payment.
So I did. I went home and I found all the info and all the account numbers I needed, and I set up an online Bill Pay from Bank B to my installment loan at Bank B (Bee Tee Dubs...don't you love how cryptic I'm being, like someone out there who hasn't de-friended me here yet is going to STEAL MY IDENTITY if I give away the simple NAMES OF MY BANKS. Online carefulness is usually not my style, but this is bank shit, yo). All settled.
Until 4 days later, when I came home from work and checked my mail.
Whereupon I had a check.
From me.
To me.
For my car loan.
Bank B's online bill pay SENT ME A CHECK FROM MY OWN ACCOUNT as a way of "paying" my installment loan.
(To be fair [fair-ish], the check was made out to Bank A Installment Loans Account [Number]. At my address. Because, CLEARLY, I AM A BANK)
So I took this check to Bank B and asked WTF it was.
The teller lady had no idea.
Her manager had no idea.
No idea why it was sent to me, or why a check had even been cut in the first place instead of a simple account credit. But there it was, plain as day. We all had a good laugh about the silliness of it all, and Bank B--still incapable of paying a loan they DID NOT inherit from Bank A with my checking account that they DID--told me to call Bank A and set up a payment by phone.
I called Bank A and explain the situation to them. Here is my mental recollection of what happened:
Lady: Hi, this is Unmemorable Name for Bank A. How may I fuck you in your colon today?
Me: Hi, yes, allow me to explain this whole situation to you.
Lady: Oh, that fills me with phony sympathy. Let's set up a pay-by-phone for you.
Me: Yes, let's.
Lady: There will be a $15 Western Union fee for paying by phone.
Me: ..............Yeah, but there won't.
Lady: Well, if you want to avoid the fee, you can pay by mail by sending in a check.
Me: I don't....I don't OWN checks. I haven't had a check in two years. I pay everything online. EXCEPT THIS ALL OF THE SUDDEN.
Lady: Well then you will have to pay the $15 fee.
Me: *hangs up*
The next day, I decided to try back. I called Bank A again and started into my spiel, whereupon Unhelpful Phone Man placed me "on hold" which was ACTUALLY transferring me to the automated Pay By Phone menu WHICH WANTED TO CHARGE ME A $15 FEE. I hung up AGAIN.
So I called back Monday night, and spoke to a MUCH MORE HELPFUL representative, who transferred me to his supervisor. They both agreed I should NOT be charged a fee for something I used to do for FREE until these two banks decided to split my accounts like Solomon splits babies. Here is the NEXT mental transcript:
Supervisor: Let's set up this fee-free payment for you. What are your Bank B account and routing numbers?
Me: I don't know that. I am in my car. I have my check card to read to you (I WAS PARKED, I WAS PARKED; don't give me any crap for this).
Supervisor: We need your account numbers; we can't use your card.
Me: OH MY GOD.
Supervisor: Call us back when you get the numbers!
SO. I called back Tuesday night. AT 6:30. THIS IS HIGHLY RELEVANT. And I spoke to a girl whom was filled with very realistic phony sympathy. And told me that she would be happy to take my payment sans fee, but she'd have to transfer me to the lending department, WHICH CLOSED AT 6:00PM SO PLEASE CALL BACK TOMORROW.
Believe it or not, I did--DID!--finally get everything taken care of yesterday. I called, talked to a person, and got transferred to the lending department. I didn't even mention the $15 fee, and neither did they, so if they charged me for it, I have no idea. And by this point, I didn't even WANT to bring up the daily late fee of x-amount of cents per day I had been accruing since the last week of November. Who cares? I paid off my car--I only had THREE MORE PAYMENTS TO GO when all this started--so hopefully, I will be done with them forever. You can bet I am keeping the confirmation number the very last person gave me.......I don't trust these people to do ANYTHING right.