LMFAO. This HAS to be the funniest official statement I've ever heard from a football club.
Basically, Craig Bellamy (Newcastle player on loan at Celtic) sent "threatening" text messages to Alan Shearer, who replied (and I never thought I'd say this, but good on him!) "in no uncertain terms" telling Bellamy he wouldn't be welcome back at St James' Park.
Newcastle's official statement?
"Following media reports this morning the chairman wishes to make it clear that Alan Shearer has never said to him that he would knock seven bells out of anyone."
I kid thee not.
http://www.nufc.premiumtv.co.uk/page/NewsDetail/0,,10278~658224,00.html
Basically, Craig Bellamy (Newcastle player on loan at Celtic) sent "threatening" text messages to Alan Shearer, who replied (and I never thought I'd say this, but good on him!) "in no uncertain terms" telling Bellamy he wouldn't be welcome back at St James' Park.
Newcastle's official statement?
"Following media reports this morning the chairman wishes to make it clear that Alan Shearer has never said to him that he would knock seven bells out of anyone."
I kid thee not.
http://www.nufc.premiumtv.co.uk/page/NewsDetail/0,,10278~658224,00.html