Angela's Sanctuary

You Are 50% Weird

Normal enough to know that you're weird... But too damn weird to do anything about it!

(To Someone who has my Heart Always)



Goodnight, sleep tight
No more Tears
In the morning I'll be here
And when we say goodnight,
Dry your eyes
Because we said goodnight,
And not goodbye
We said goodnight,
And not goodbye

(Evanescence)



I will Love you 4 ever Dont ever fucking doubt that

Love You, Love Me

I am in such a low point menatlly , I should be rejoicing at all the good that has happened over the summer but I guess in some ways I am selfish. I want My friend Here !!! She lives 3 hrs away and I feel like At Times I cant even breathe w/o her. We Are very close and I dont know what I would do w/o her . She is there for me daily and has never failed me. She came this past wknd and we had so much fun and when she leaves each time its like a part of me dies inside....Plus I Cut Again this week , its been a while since my last incident, I felt so much better after, but then morning came and reality set in and I was like what the hell did I do!!!!! I feel so on the edge! I have also have a secret that I cant tell to anyone and I am forced to keep bottled inside,it is a good one but too much is at risk if I tell a soul, and its not exactley something I want anyone knowing anyways , its personal and my buisness wouldnt care if was ever able to tell anyone its just something that as long as its there I am ok . Its just so hard bc I am use to telling at least one person and LOL not this time. Anyways I am gonna go and Download more of My Chemical Romance Songs and talk to my dearest Friend take a few tylenol PMs and go to bed ...Tomorrow is yet another day.....I guess.

Despite the fact I had to visit my friend on her B-day who died back in March at her gravesite Sunday instead of her home , We are happily moved Although we have no couch we are content...and still trying to catch up from all the moving expenses etc.. living month to month literally, We are really Thanking God each day that he was able to bring us to a better place...I had a dear friend over the one i mentioned last i posted of her husband here this past weekend it was so good to have my best friend here with me to be there for me as i visited my friends grave Sunday and to just be able to have her here for the weekend was great.Still waiting on DD's Back CS to come in but all these things are minor compared to things going on elsewhere and I thank God that I am truley blessed with what I have here with me now , although LOL a couch would be nice , Just kidding , Huggs & loves Angela

Ps the other friend who is pregnant is fine all was ok she is 3 mo's now

Where do I start? One of my closest and dearest friends found out about a week ann a 1/2 that she is pregnant, she went to her ultra sound today and she is 5 1/2 weeks but they have scheduled her for another one next week which has us concerned b/c they said they wanted to see if they could see anymore bc all they are seeing now is sac , which i am not sure what all that means but I praying like mad woman that is nothing and that since she is so early that just are not able to see anything..She wants this baby sooooo bad and I am not sure she could handle it if anything happened....

Then Another Closest and dearest friend of mine is going through some crazy stuff her husband about a year and a half ago cheated on her well she caught him and they have sinced been reconciled , but the woman he was cheating w/ her husband which goes byond saying is crazy off his rocker just plain nuts was arrested the other day for trying to pay a undercover S.L.E.D. Agent thinking he was gonna accept 2500 dollars to kill her husband!
I mean he had every detail planned from what times him and my friend went to work came home , layout of there house/yard even down to intricate details of how he wanted him killed! He was Arrested last Monday i think and then on Tuesday was set w a no bond at his bond hearing ....My friend has been through sheer hell the whole time all of this has went on and I told her I would have been very p^%^%^ed bc of something that he did that has put not only him but her and their 2 boys lives in jeapordy . Someone had called in a anonymous tip that led to the S.L.E.D Agent , so Thank Goodness for that, someone was definatly watching over him that day.

Then the rest is drama here with trying to pack and getting ready to move by the 3rd omgoodness I never knew how much crap you could acquire in 7 yrs, I am so worried that things are gonna fall apart on me at last minute or something ...I went to Docs Yesterday and he upped my Lamictal from 175 mg a day to 300 mg a day so maybe that will help . I have just really been in a bad depression here lately and have no idea why this should be a happy time we are starting another Chapter in our lives. Anyways Also on a sadder and more depressing note , I saw my cousin The Hubby of the dear friend that Died in March came down and was talking the other day and i asked him if they had ever got the final autopsy report and he said that her mom got it back in May and didnt even tell them til now (but I cannot say anything about that is not my place after all that was her daughter and he and she at the time had been seperated not that long but seperated all the same) and it said that it was a lethal about of Seroquil & Cocaine in her body at the time of her death and ruled it as a suicide....I really cant believe that , answer me this why would anyone who is gonna commit suicide have there clothes and towels ready for theierself to get out of bath (which is where she was found)Accidental overdosage maybe but suicide I just cant accept that now I dont know if I ever will but thats what was decided. So with all said I will write more later when i have packed more , so I guess bye 4 now.

Well I am so Impatient! We are waiting on my grandmother to receive the
title to the car. She told my brother to mail it to her so we could all go
to tag office together so she can put a lien on the title since we still owe
her from the other car Grrrr ...Which thats fine but we need a legal car ,
we have the car but has no legal tag or Inspection Sticker and we cant do
anything until she gets title and we go to tagg office .So its like we are
sitting here twindling our fingers,Its so aggravating, and I am sooo
frustrated ...I need to get off my butt and start packing also, its like I
cant get motivated. I cannot wait until all this is over and we are settled,
the only good thing is that hubbys dad said today he got us a way to move
our stuff so that relieves us of having to rent a U-haul . Anyways I am just
so mentally tired and so afraid we wont get everything done in time ,
praying we do...Also Praying for all those In The UK That are suffering or
suffered from the horrible tragedy that happened Last week..So I will leave
tonight on that note.
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-------Original Message-------


Subject: (No Offense Intended Just a share from a email I received)

"Cute blonde jokes"

FIRST DEGREE
A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning.
The wife (undoubtedly blonde), picked up the phone, listened a moment and
said, "How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!" and hung up.
The husband said, "Who was that?"
The wife said, "I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is
clear."
SECOND DEGREE
Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the
sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and
says, "Hmm, this person looks familiar."
The second blonde says, "Here, let me see!" So the first blonde hands her
the compact.
The second one looks in the mirror and says, "You dummy, it's me!"
THIRD DEGREE
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys
a gun.
She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds
him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens
her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with
grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head.
The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!!"
The blonde replies, "Shut up, you're next!"
FOURTH DEGREE
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals.
She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them."
A friend says, "OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin ?"
The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy: W."
FIFTH DEGREE
What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?
"Is it mine?"
SIXTH DEGREE
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA freshman, sat in her U. S.
government class. The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade
was about?
Bambi pondered the question then finally said, "That was the decision George
Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware."
SEVENTH DEGREE
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked
and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.
The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit,
patrolling nearby was the first to respond. As the K-9 officer approached
the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch,
shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps.
Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, "I come home to find all my
possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They
send me a BLIND policeman."
OK. Now forward this to someone else who needs a laugh today! :)

to explain what it was like all weekend I think i was in one of my manic
depressive states . Usually I will go to my friends(neighbors) house and we
will hang out and watch movies or whatever , since she only has her client
that lives with her on every other weekend ...Well its like I was soooooo at
my bottom . I didnt want to even get out of this dang PC Chair.I think she
got upset with me even though she says she didnt and said she just doesnt
like seeing me cooped up in house all day.With all the mess w the car, then
My SIL calls and Cusses me out ..LONG STORY , not even gonna try to explain
that one, and my nephew who was just recently diagnosed with Epilepsy, The
docs are now saying they see something on his brain and they think possibly
could be a tumor. I have wanted to cut sooooooo bad , its like all my
emotions have been thrown up into a cyclone and whichever one happens to
land is the one I am at the moment. Its not a good feeling at all. I am
just gonna focus on packing and getting ready to move and getting things
with this other car my dad let us have straight. I have to call my insurance
tomorrow and get it switched over to this other one and we have to go file
for a lost title also. Its the little things like that that drive me up the
wall.I am saving as much money as I can so we can afford all our transfers
of our utilities, and in case we run into any problems along the way.And
packing this apt , even though its is a small apt is gonna be a job DD and I
alone have collected at least 7 yrs worth of stuff(thats how long we have
lived here) and hubby I would say at least 4 and DS 3 LOL so its not gonna
be a easy task but dang if it wont get done ....Eventually LOL. I am so
wanting to learn how to do some of this modfying in my journal, but have no
clue as to some of it , Anyone willing to help LOL , I did good to get the
Evanescence Background there BTW How's it look , ok Now I know its bedtime I
am talking to myself LMAO! More Later

Angela
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Fairy In Waiting A psp thing I whipped up really quick for right size to see if the pic thing worked LOL Trust me I Can Do Loads Better