Relevance of Truth And Lies

Right now, it's definitely been Witches of East End. I'm really addicted right now and am so upset that there've already cancelled it! Such a good show.

I always love witches in TV series especially, but also movies. And this one had great lore and mythology tied in, plus there was such a rich history, because they did different times, not just the present... And no one is one hundred percent the good or bad guy. I really like complex characters.

So, I guess I'm an angry feminist for posting this (since there appears to be no other kind since the word feminist seems synonymous with "crazy angry man-hating irrational lesbian bitch"... can you already see where this post is going?), but I'll give it a try anyway.

A feminist is not a crazy angry man-hating irrational lesbian bitch. Actually, a feminist is someone (or is supposed to be) who believes that men and women (notice how both genders are being included in this definition? Cool, now stay with me) should be treated equally, in the same sense that a nerdy man and a construction working man should be treated equally. Can they do the same jobs? If one sits in front of a computer all day and the other spends all day doing hard labor (these are both men, remember?) then probably they are not equipped to do the same job. But if they wanted to try, they should have the opportunity to do so.

Still following? Great.

So if a man who is not as physically strong as another man should have the chance to do the same job (either by just trying or by working out and making his body physically capable of doing said job), then why is it strange to say that a woman wants that same courtesy?

Before you start going all crazy and ranting at me about how I'm a liberal nut, an angry butch lesbian, or clearly out of my mind (not that I'm necessarily denying any of those that except for the angry butch lesbian part - I'm an equal opportunity lover, thank you very much), let me finish what I'm trying to say.

Women tend to be the physically weaker of the species (have I given all you anti-feminists out there something akin to prosaic? Good, now keep reading); however, as in the example above with the weaker/stronger men, we, as a gender, are CAPABLE (know what this word means? It's something close to the Little Engine that Could) of being as strong as a man. Now, if I'm 5'7'' (give or take half an inch) at 135lbs and am going up against my 6'2'' 175lbs boyfriend, do I have much chance of ever physically being stronger than him? No, probably not. But, I can work hard to reach the point where I can do many of the same things that a man OF MY SIZE could do.

Probably, I'm not going to. I've got my own goals and I don't need to get into a pissing contest with a 5'7'' man over whether or not I can bench press as much.

I'd like to take a moment to point out that there are female body builders in the world, and I've seen a lady that is 5'11'' and I'll tell you what, there ain't nothin' that lady can't do. (And she's gorgeous to boot.)

Okay, so, from this standpoint in my argument, we have men who are not as physically strong as other men, and women who are capable of being comparatively as strong as a man of their size. And in the end, all those crazy, angry women want, is to be treated equally.

Wanna know how you give someone equality? You give them choice.

Because there are women out there who don't WANT to be construction workers (obviously), just like there are men out there who don't want to be construction workers. But there are also women who don't just want to be baby-makers. There are men who want to be stay-at-home dads. There are male manicurist, female business executives, there are hairdressers who ARE NOT GAY. I know this is a strange concept for many of you, but face facts: people just want the right to choose to do something they love or to choose not to do something they don't.

Are you really going to bash the people who say that that's how it should be? And you call me the crazy one.

Sincerely,
Missi. The Equal Opportunity Feminist

Disclaimer: I'm not saying there are NO angry feminists - that really would be insanity. There are crazy, angry, man-hating women out there who go under the guise of feminist. But to label all of them as such is unfair, just like it would be unfair for me to say all Christian are racist, over-zealous, homophobic pigs. I know for a fact that that isn't true, because I've met Christians who are awesome and very accepting of people. But I've met the crazy ones, too. Moral of the story? Don't lump everyone together just because you had A bad experience. Grow up and realize that there is nothing in this world that is black and white (not even old movies; they've got some gray going on, too).

Dear the Commenter of Tattoo Pictures;

First, I just really need to point out the most obvious thing that always makes me head-smack myself everytime I think about it: you are commenting on a tattoo picture posted on a website that is dedicated to tattoos for THOSE WHO LOVE TATTOOS. So either you're a troll (read: asshole) or an idiot. I don't care which you choose to subscribe to, but there's really no alternative explanation (I suppose you could be playing devil's advocate, but c'mon, we all know you aren't smart enough for that, so we'll move on).

Now that we've gotten that glaring contradiction out of the way, we can get to the good stuff.

Like, the ever popular supposed to be rhetorical question that everyone loves to make a stink about, "But what will she look like in twenty years?" Please note, there are several variations of this question, including but not limited to, "What will she look like when she's seventy?" "How sexy will that tattoo be when she's old and wrinkly?" and my personal favorite, "Eww! She look so gross wen 50!1!!" (Okay, not a question, but you get the point.) I'd just like to respond to these deep, philosophical rhetorical questions with a couple of my own: "How will a non-tattooed person look when they're seventy?" "Do you think non-tattooed grannies are sexy?" and, of course, "Who gives a fuck?"

My point being this: In forty or fifty years we will all be old, wrinkled, sagging, and probably fat (not necessarily, but it's likely we're going to be heavier than we are now). Our hair will be gray, our ears will look like they're sprouting rabbit tails, our faces will look like someone's been pinching our cheeks and tugging as far as they will go, and we will have cellulite where once there was none. Sure, tattoos aren't going to look as beautiful and striking as they once were when we were younger, but neither will we. Fact of the matter is, growing old is a part of growing up and that's a part of life, so you'd better consider that before you go shooting your mouth off. 'Cause we're all in the same boat. Tattoos are just going to be a collection of memories - like an old scar, a favorite freckle, or a laugh line - that mean something to the person sporting them. And not liking the way that looks on someone else sounds an awful lot like a YOU problem than anything else.

Moving on to my next pet-peeve when it comes to those responding to posted tattoo pictures: "One baby later is all withered" or "Hope she don't get preg lmao" (actual comments). Here's the thing about this one, I partially agree. Certain tattoos can go pretty bad once your stomach blows up to the size of a watermelon and you pop out a Bundle of Joy. Stretching can be a real problem for tattoos, and it's pretty hard to avoid. But this kind of goes along with the one above, in that life and time are going to affect your entire body, so you shouldn't be so judgy about things as personal as tattoos. Getting pregnant can mess up ANYONE'S body. Some can get their old body back, some can't, and either way, it shouldn't really make someone look at them in a different way. If you've been brave and strong enough to pop out a kid (or more) then power to you. I sure as hell am not going to be a douchebag and call you fat. And if you've gotten a tattoo, awesome, love 'em, then you get pregnant? That's cool, too. Doing one awesome thing and then another, does not negate the previous awesome thing. That's like saying "I was an amazing athlete for ten years, but I blew out my knee and can't do the things I used to, so now I'm getting a little heavier and older, so those ten years don't mean anything now." I'll bet you ten bucks that most athletes and sports aficionados will tell you you're out of your goddamn mind if you think that's the case. Life is the act of change, folks. Best just accept that and let people do what they do (as long as it's not hurting you, what do you care?).

And I suppose my last one is personally offending to me, because I may be able to see where it comes from, but I still think it's wrong and a lousy excuse for having a problem: "Tattoos are just trashy on girls. What a whore."

I can't even express how much this kind of comment pisses me off. And there are so many reasons why. Shall I start with the part that makes it girl-specific? So, what, if I were a dude having a tattoo would be fine and I could still be a respectable person? It's just 'cause I've got the balls to sit through pain for three hours, while the rest of you whine about getting shots from the doctor that makes me trashy? Or maybe I should head over to the "whore" part, where tattoos are equated with not just being trashy, but being cheap and easy. Gotta love that part. Not only because it gets a boost from the previous statement (tattoos = trashy, and trashy = whore, and whore = only female, obviously), but also because it's a biased, stereotyped generalization that basically says if you deviate from the norms of society (in this case, have a tattoo), then you are automatically sexually deviant, particularly in the sense of being slutty, skanky, and overall easy.

Not only do I have a problem with the whole "whore" terminology* (see note below) but that you can so freely judge a person by a single attribute of their physical body, is ridiculous. Whatever happened to don't judge a book by it's cover? Whatever happened to appearances aren't everything? Whatever happened to love people for who they are? Did we just decide it was a load of bull and toss it out the nearest open window? 'Cause I'd like to believe we still live in a place where the inside counts for something. And I'd also like to point out that I've met a fair amount of asshole college boys who have looked clean, charming, sweet, etc. the whole package, and ended up being the biggest jerks I've ever had the misfortune of knowing. My boyfriend on the other hand has hair longer than mine, about the same number of tattoos, doesn't shave his face every day, stands at about 6'2'' and has a voice that makes more than one person nervous over the phone. He also will do just about anything for his family, treats dogs like family, and loves me unconditionally. So think about that the next time you want to be an asshole and not look past the surface.

And you know, mostly, when it comes right down to it, all my bitching about stupid people commenting on tattoo pictures, is my own fault. Because I can always choose to simply not read them, just like they can choose to not look at pictures of tattooed people. See how that works? But since I can't resist an idiot commenting, I just have to share my spiel about it.

I get that it's an opinion, really, I do. And I don't require you to like tattoos, to date tattooed women/men, or even to approve. But you don't get to pass judgement on people just because they do something you would never do yourself. Keep an open eye, folks. I don't go into your favorite things and post how stupid they are, so I'd appreciate it if you could return the favor.

Sincerely,
 Me, the Girl With The Not-Dragon Tattoo

Note:
*enjoying sex, being sexually active, or to have had sex with more than one partner at different points in your life does not make you a whore (though, obviously, there are appropriate contexts for whore, ie actually being a prostitute, or sleeping around in the sense of cheating, or sleeping around with a rather large number of people in quick succession of one another might construe you as "slutty." Which doesn't necessarily make you a bad person, but I'd recommend that you give potential suitors a heads up as to what you're about and get yourself checked regularly if this is you. Better to be safe than sorry, be healthy, and don't hurt other people. And for the record, guys, if you do this, too? Yeah, you're a whore. You don't get an exemption just cause you have a penis. I don't play that bullshit game anymore.)