Happily Ever After Depends On Where You Stop The Story

Merry Christmas everybody! Have a happy and safe holiday!

Dear All,

My thanks to all those who have sent me emails this past year...

I must send my thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat shit in the
glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet towel with every
envelope that needs sealing.

Also, I now have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same
reason.

I no longer have any savings because I gave everything to a sick girl
(Penny Brown); who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time.

I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive
the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for
participating in their special e-mail program...

Or from the senior bank clerk in Nigeria who wants to split $70 million with
me for pretending to be a long lost relative of a customer who died intestate.

I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out
for me and St. Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like
a water buffalo on a hot day.

Thanks to you,

I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward e-mails
to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.

Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca-Cola because it can
remove toilet stains.

I can no longer buy petrol without taking a friend along to watch the
car so a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a
aftershave sample and rob me.

I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a
number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda,
Singapore and Uzbekistan.

Thanks to you, I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown
African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when
it bites my bum.

And thanks to your great advice,

I can't even pick up the $50.00 I found dropped in the car park
because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting
underneath my car to grab my leg.

If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next
70 minutes, a large dove with diarrhoea will land on your head at
5:00pm this afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your
back, causing you to grow a hairy hump.

I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my
next door neighbour's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's
beautician's relative once removed.

By the way... a South American scientist after a lengthy study has
discovered that people with low IQ who have infrequent sexual activity
always read their e-mails with their hand on the mouse.

Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late!

Can anyone point me to some FREE online SLASH/YAOI comics? Preferably LONG and, if not complete, REGULARLY UPDATED. I DON'T WANT FANCOMICS, please: i.e. no Spiderman, Batman, Harry Potter, Superman, Xmen, etc. fanfiction. I want ORIGINAL MATERIAL.

Here's a list of some SUPERB comics I've already discovered:

Vampirates

Missing Pieces

Honeydew Syndrome

Guests in Purgatory

I C DED PPLE (Possibly not Slash, but brilliant anyway)

PLEASE help, I don't know how to FIND any others, I've tried Googling 'Slash/Yaoi comics online' but it doesn't really get me very far. So if someone can PLEASE tell be how to find these things (or rec me a few) I'll be eternally grateful.

Mirror

I've been having a sweet-deprived week and CRAVED dessert tonight... unfortunately there was nothing sweet in the house! Then I remembered a carton of custard in the fridge and rejoiced! I grabbed it, checked the use-by date (20 September), fetched a bowl and poured... then nearly had a panic attack because this stream of whitish liquid came out instead of the gloopy yellowish stuff I'd been expecting!
I looked at the label on the carton, said, "Oh look: Buttermilk," then sighed and put the stuff back in the fridge.

Did I miss something or did JKR not answer a few things she was supposed to?

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I've finished.

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Man, I'm going to finish this when I'm more coherent.

Seeya later!

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ETA: Lol, I've just learned how to do a lj-cut (thanks Jan-aq). Sorry about the spoilers...

I just saw OotP yesterday!
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I loved it! Wonderful effects and Luna was perfect! I cried when Sirius died... again. But the one thing I'm weirded out by is that they didn't say the whole prophesy! Why the fuck not?! It's not THAT long! They added in a bit where Harry's battling Voldemort in his head after Sirius' death and I thought that was a nice touch, and the duel b/w Dumbledore and Voldemort was spectacular!
Umbridge was perfect too! The only real concern I have is about the prophesy... *sigh*. You can't win.

"Finishing the book is a relief. I can't think of anyone who could know how I felt. Actually finishing it was the most remarkable feeling I've ever had... [I felt] euphoria, devastated, when I finished one chapter near the end I absolutely howled, it had been planned for so long."
- JKR on Deathly Hallows

I just saw this on MuggleNet and had to give my 2cents: Oh. No. This is the most ominous comment I've seen to date. Something wicked this way comes and I mean that in the worst possible way. Who's going to join me in reading the last page 1st? Come on, I want a show of hands here.

PotC SPOILER!!!
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OMG! At World's End is A.M.A.Z.I.N.G. I do believe that this is one of the very few fandoms where Slash isn't the go for me. I cried when Will got stabbed... I confess, I did :(!
This is my theory: Will is now immortal (well dah!) but Elizabeth, as Keeper of the Heart, is immortal too because what's Will got to live for otherwise? He'll only see her a total of 4 times if she's mortal (that's if she lives to 70) and that's just so not cool! Their son is also immortal: he was obviously conceived AFTER the whole Will-stabs-Davy-Jones'-heart ordeal. Boot-strap's immortal too, he's living on the Flying Dutchman. Jack and co. are going to find the Fountain of Youth, making sure THEY never die either. So it's all going to be one big happy family!

THE END

P.S. If Will can only set foot on land every 10 years, why the heck doesn't he meet with Elizabeth at sea? I mean WTF? Take her onto the Flying Dutchman for Chrissake!

Here's something that really pisses me off about the Harry Potter movies: they constantly make Harry out to be dumber than he is!
In PS Canon, it's Harry who suggests that the Dursleys don't know he can't do magic but in the movie it's Hagrid! I don't understand why they'd do this?
In PoA Canon, Harry is the one to figure out that Dumbledore wanted them to save Buckbeak. In the movie it's Hermione who gets that honour! Why? What the bloody hell does this achieve? They're making Harry out to be a bit of a drop-kick and I really don't understand the purpose because it's not as if it would cause the movie to go overtime! If anything, it'd SAVE time! Gah! I don't think I'll ever understand the minds of script-writers.

ETA: Ok... well I managed to somehow post this twice then deleted the one with actual replies... *headdesk* Gah! Today is just not my day.