Long week is long
Tomorrow's Friday. It's all over.
In more than one way.
Fifteen months are gone, in one way.
The longest week of my life is over, in another.
My reason for living is fading, but not quite gone. Not quite, eh.
Long week is long. Today is the second longest day, just behind... Monday? When I woke up at 4 AM and didn't sleep until eleven or midnight or something. It's been a terrible week.
Strangely happy today.
When it's the worst day of all.
I can't help but think that if I didn't go to Amber's livejournal, if her account didn't autosignin and if I didn't read that entry, either none of this would have happened (as in I blew it all out of proportion when I read the entry), or I'd be completely oblivious as to why it was happening (though I suppose she'd've told me eventually. Yeah).
So here I am. I don't know what to think. I just got off the phone with Amber, same as normal; we spent the evening on AIM, same as normal. We even did a sortof cyber thing, but only sort of because we didn't want to devalue things by cybering when we were broken up. Then we had a pantsless party on the phone...
...so confused at what to think. We love each other still, I don't know why we're broken up. Well, I do. It's just not a good reason to me. Still, who am I to judge? I only think it's not a good reason because I personally wouldn't do it. Maybe I would if I had four or five girls who wanted me. I can't say. I think I'm loyal enough... but am I really that strong-willed? It must be hard to force yourself to stay with me.
I'm going to try to take this as slowly as I can. Gonna go like I always do, take it slowly...
/*All along [still] it was the geto, nothing but the geto
Takin short steps one foot at a time and keep my head low
And never let go
cause if I let go, then I'll be spineless
I'm goin' INSANE!*/
I'll be spinless, I'm going INSANE.
In more than one way.
Fifteen months are gone, in one way.
The longest week of my life is over, in another.
My reason for living is fading, but not quite gone. Not quite, eh.
Long week is long. Today is the second longest day, just behind... Monday? When I woke up at 4 AM and didn't sleep until eleven or midnight or something. It's been a terrible week.
Strangely happy today.
When it's the worst day of all.
I can't help but think that if I didn't go to Amber's livejournal, if her account didn't autosignin and if I didn't read that entry, either none of this would have happened (as in I blew it all out of proportion when I read the entry), or I'd be completely oblivious as to why it was happening (though I suppose she'd've told me eventually. Yeah).
So here I am. I don't know what to think. I just got off the phone with Amber, same as normal; we spent the evening on AIM, same as normal. We even did a sortof cyber thing, but only sort of because we didn't want to devalue things by cybering when we were broken up. Then we had a pantsless party on the phone...
...so confused at what to think. We love each other still, I don't know why we're broken up. Well, I do. It's just not a good reason to me. Still, who am I to judge? I only think it's not a good reason because I personally wouldn't do it. Maybe I would if I had four or five girls who wanted me. I can't say. I think I'm loyal enough... but am I really that strong-willed? It must be hard to force yourself to stay with me.
I'm going to try to take this as slowly as I can. Gonna go like I always do, take it slowly...
/*All along [still] it was the geto, nothing but the geto
Takin short steps one foot at a time and keep my head low
And never let go
cause if I let go, then I'll be spineless
I'm goin' INSANE!*/
I'll be spinless, I'm going INSANE.