masssterchief

I know I have taken a long, long break from here.

These past two years were rough. I was a fish out of water, desperately trying to breathe.
I know I tend to isolate myself far away from what I love when things go hard. As a punishment, as a test.

Although I know it's sabotaging my life, it's my way to properly face myself. With all the demons inside.

I took a long break from here. From all the warmth, from all the love.

Subaru.

I heard the news when I was watching Chronicle I downloaded god knows when. I miss Eito. I miss Subaru. I was slowly going on my feet again.
I thought it was a cruel prank. It was not funny at all. I remember feeling irritated, like, what are you talking about?!

Again I am a fish out of water. It looks like all these people are living and breathing different air than me.
This is Subaru we're talking about..

And then everything stated to make sense. Like the air barging in to my lungs all at once. It was an eureka moment with a pang in the heart. "Ah, so he will stop being an idol."

All the feelings started to rush in, uncontrolably. But this is Subaru we're talking about!
The Subaru that loves Eito so much!
You have got to be kidding me!
There've got to be some kind of mistake!
Is it Johnny? Is there some kind of scandal?

Indeed, denial is easier than acceptance. I can preserve the idea of Subaru that I love into one coherent reality.
Which I know, will be scattered by reality.
Maybe this is why we do not want reality.
It hurts and it scatters things you wish to keep as something certain in your life.

But I'm still here, somehow. For some unknown reason.

Eito is my joy.
Unlike anything that I love, I can clearly say what and why and how I love them. And Subaru. Always Eito and Subaru, and Subaru and Eito.

I know, I'm expected to support his decision to leave. I know. I know but..

Won't you let me grief?

I'll probably going to be on my own feet again eventually, but I will go there at my own pace.

Subaru, I love your passion. I fell in love with your voice. Most of all, I love how you love Eito. But I also love your rebeliousness and how un-idol-like you can be. I love your courage.
And that courage is what breaks my heart. Life is cruel that way.

For now, I think I will never forgive you if I don't hear you singing somewhere or that you stop pursuing music.

Today, between sadness and anger, I choose anger.

Dear lovely fellow eighters...

HAPPY EITO DAY!!! *throws confetti*

GOD I CAN'T BELIEVE I MADE IT.
Did you all forget me yet? I'm such a bratty ignorant smart-ass that I want to slap in the face when I thought I can somewhat manage to work and sub at the same time.
It. was. nearly. impossible.
Maybe because I can't seem to separate my job and my private time.. It's like I take this job as my life.

But I made it to make a tribute to this lovely day.
Here you go, This is KANPANI DVD SP Disc 2 part 1!

[BY CLICKING THIS, I TAKE THAT YOU ARE WILLING AND PREPARED TO NOT ABUSE MY WORK!]HQ Hardsub (175 MB)
Gdrive
Mega thanks to lou_rules♥

As usual, MIRRORS ARE LOVED♥


Credit:
Translation/Timing/Typesetting/QC/Encoding: pikaCHII
RAW: dozchan

I intent to sub much larger (and longer) file than this. but............... well........... I can't. I simply can't.
I will manage to keep up to translate and sub more.
Because last month was a crucial month for me. Spartan hell and crucial. Because last month was my last month as a prob worker. Now I'm a full time worker. So, it means either I can relax a bit or I can never relax again lol. (I laugh, but I cry....)
But I love doing this. I love subaru *cough* eito so much.
It sadden me when there's nothing new in the fandom to droll about.
So I hope I can give you doses of eito love to make you stick to the fandom. Wish me luck.

I'll leave this open, but there's a chance that I'll lock it if I find something suspicious :s
So please don't abuse my work!

As usual..
Any feedbacks will be loved. ♥♥♥
Hope I can find more motivation and experiences to do better in the future!
Have a good day!

PS: I f-ing missed subaru. Like hell. It's been a long time since I sit down and drown myself in his almighty-ness. But since it's Eito Day, have a dose of ER2! (that I'm not so crazy about... sorry dearests.)

Japanese JWEB Credit: Subaru922, coria1984♥

Ookaay, this month is full of fan-service entries from Subaru.
It started from deep-encouraging Subaru, YokoxBaru, SubaruxRyo, and now it's SubaruxMaru♥
(You won't see me complaining about that xD)
Subaru is really compatible with Maru, the one that can keep up with his high tension.
And I also suspect that when Subaru had a mood-swing, he came close to Maru so he can raise his mood :)
I mean, their interaction in Janiben explains it all!♥♥♥
I'm glad Subaru and Maru discover each other early in their life, right when they had an interview to enter Johnny's actually. So that at the earliest stage of his stressful path, he had someone to make him laugh :')

A little explanation about this entry, other than the hilariously adorable "My brother" remark, Subaru also add some cheesy joke that I (unfortunately) can't translate to english literally. Because it was a pun.
at the (*) part, Subaru wrote that he had a 素敵なステーキ (wonderful steak; but you read it in romaji as "suteki na sute-ki" *sigh* Subaru....... stop........)
And a "My Brassiere" remark.......... I think it's about Maru's Johnny's Countdown "annual surprise". This two hopeless old men is killing me......♥♥♥

PS: Have a SubaruxMaru dose and hope you have a good day! :D

Japanese JWEB Credit: Subaru922, coria1984♥
I'm sorry for being able to translated this only now. orz
I'll translate this week's jweb now............

Oh, tomato and mustard♥
Why are you torturing us with our irrational imagination?♥
Please don't give your cold to Subaru, dear Ryo.
Because as we all know, this little yakuza has surprisingly weak body xD

PS: I really love this moment I can't even............................♥♥♥♥

Japanese JWEB Credit: Subaru922, coria1984, and baru_world♥

Ah, how much Subaru adores Yoko♥
I love them so much♥
Almost forgot! Subaru used これ instead of 彼 in the (*) sentence. That's why I translate it as "this" not "he".
As usual, often Subaru's word choice made me rethinking his rebellious nature.

PS: Got a lot of things to do, so just enjoy how absurdly adorable Subaru and Yoko can be♥
God, they're perfect for each other. They're like real brothers♥ :')

Japanese JWEB Credit: coria1984

I'm on the roll!
And he's back! Deep-Encouraging-Subaru!
I can say that in this kind of topic, his logic and mine are similar.
Something that your head can understand but quite hard to actually do.
Well, but only you can change yourself, right?

Have a nice Sunday!

PS: Suba dose that will blow your mind~♥

Japanese JWEB Credit: Subaru922, coria1984, and baru_world♥

FINALLY. I manage to squeeze some time to translate this.
While we're at it, shall we talk about JUKEBOX? Since subaru kindly opened up the subject anyway.

LIVE TOUR JUKEBOX DVD was one emotional roller coaster DVD consist of 4 discs full of out-blown-epicness♥
Even in the first few songs I watch in the first disc manage made me cry a river. From disc one to disc four, it started out emotional for about 5 continuous tear jerker songs+the MC, then it was fun, then it was hilarious, then it went serious and back to emotional (with a punch in the gut that will made you stop doing anything but to crawl into a ball full of tears. The goddamnit All is Well was the peak of it) and then it was hilariously fun again, then it went precious (*cough*Otokogi taiketsu batsu Game*cough*), then it went serious, then fun, then......... okay you get my point.
Take all the tissues you have when you watch this. It'll be exactly like this:


PS: Because I'm still celebrating Yoko's birthday, here, have a YokoXBaru dose in JUKEBOX♥

Requested by yunfa46♥

Hi! I'm bringing you today, the group talk for Subaru & Yasu's Birthday!
It's on Potato Magazine (November 2010)
Let me warn you, the talk are quite long.. I'm dividing it into two parts, because there are two theme in this talk.
Each theme is long. so don't be surprised by it~♥


Scan Credit: yunfa46♥

[Explosure of the two September born men that are going through the road to become a small old-man!?]





[Classic pattern of birthda party in Kanjani8]




Just like the title, the talk focused on birthdays. Especially Yasuba's, but not all about them.
It's cute how you can know more about their preference about things and presents..
They really are different from one another. Rainbow colored personalities♥
Hope you enjoyed this as much as I do.

PS: Two cute small old-men♥ I have nothing to complain about♥